Extremely embarrassing behaviour

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moneypit1

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WELL, how do I put this.........The old chap who rolls my field was agog and looking through me as I was chatting to him today. I wondered why i did not have his full attention and looked around to see what was so interesting behind me. What can I say...........Harry (who is three and gelded incidently) was exhibiting a very personal part of his anatomy and quite frankly was being exceptionally RUDE! I tried to ignore it but felt some sort of comment was necessary when Harry started to "flap" the offending appendage against his belly. I did the good old British thing and talked about the "weather"! He simply turned around and said "Springs here then" and off he went!
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Animals... was once showing someone round my old house, which we were trying to sell, and the dog started to wipe his arse on the carpet. The women just muttered something about needing his glands done and made a quick exit....que carpet cleaner. needless to say we never heard from her again!!
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Well, forgive me if im wrong BUT............I was told that a gelding could not get .... well, you know, a "stiff" fifth leg, but he certainly can and does regularly! Oh my, blush, blush!!!
 
Thats a fav trick of my horse too. Usually as there are a lot of workmen or tractor drivers around.
I could shoot mine tonight, had words with YO and other girl on yard tonight over how horrible my horse is to bring in (no one but OH and me will go near him) 99% of the time hes a pussy cat but he can do a runner occasionally and I was defending him and saying he'd done nothing for ages and they should get over it and you guessed it, tonight he took off and refused to be caught and didn't want to come in until he realised everything else was in. My face was red by the time he'd finished as everyone stopped and watched him with their hands on their hips.
 
Could have been worst, my mare spent last summer getting her gelding friend to par take in games of field wheel-barrows!!!! The lady in the bungalow behind my mares field came out one morning when I was poo picking to ask a) if the boy was gelded?? and b) did I know what they were getting up to when I wasn't around???
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I was sitting on my little fat mare after a schooling session, proudly talking to the YO (male) about her recent Dressage test win ( Walk and Trot test- first time out) when suddenly she staggered her hind legs, dropped her back end and started winking and squirting, and peeing all over the concrete yard, in the direction of my daughters uncut colt that was standing nearby in the field.
I tried to move her off but she wouldn`t budge either and was whickering at him too, - I was mortified!!!
Too embarrassed to even think of anything witty or clever to say, as actually I rather fancied the YO and all the other girls that were looking, sniggling, knew that!
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Actually if they do it on the yard it's a great opportunity to whip out the vaseline and do a bit of 'personal care' ......... well only if there are no 'non-horsey' people around obviously as they don't tend to understand the finer points of willie cleaning! It can certainly look like a dodgy bit of behaviour.
 
I used to ride a cob who would let his hang out while you worked him (think it was his equivalent of sticking his tongue out in concentration) and it would swing in trot and hit your leg!
 
Oh best laugh for ages Piebald! Never heard it called field wheelbarrows before but how totally perfect! There's a gelding at our yard that plays field wheelbarrows with anything female. Randy little git! He's a handsome sweety and I suppose if I was a mare I'd fancy him! By the way, he has NO trouble getting a stiffy (am I allowed to say that?)
 
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it would swing in trot and hit your leg!

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EWWW! He must be... ummm.... well... hung like a horse! lol. our boys seemed to go through a phase of all getting em out when we first got scrooge (we think he was gelded really late and is a little stallionish) anyway, one of the other grooms decided they were comparing and that scroo had penis envy and that was why he was playing up!
 
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