Eye loss and riding, handling again

Hi Gamebird

Thanks so much for sharing your story, I'm so glad your sight has mostly returned.

Wow, you did so well continuing to do so much with horses, and the riding. Massive respect to you for riding things like that!! I will be doing dressage and hacking, but that'll be about it, I'm not brave enough to do anything like team chasing or hunt races :-o

I was back to handling my two old horses fairly soon after the accident, but it took me a lot longer to go anywhere near my two youngsters (which is the main reason they initially went away to professional yards because it just wasn't fair on them being under my control when I was in that state). I'm still more wary with the two of them, but am back to holding the 5 year old when I see him at events (luckily he's doing fabulously with a professional eventer) and being a bit more around the 6 year old. It doesn't help that they are huge horses (16.3 hh and 17.2 hh) and I'm a 5'2" midget...

I so know what you mean about riding on the road - it is the thing I am most scared of hacking out. I am currently going out with someone else which makes me feel better, although I am very lucky with my 18 year old that she is absolutely rock solid and takes such good care of me. If it had to be any eye, I wish it had been the left eye, but it wasn't. I so want to eventually ride my 6 year old again, but I am going to wait a few more years till he's older and he's had a good few years of being exercised with the hunters. He's moving to a livery yard that has mostly off road riding, which will be a great help.

Ditto - if I'm not concentrating I do things like banging my head on things on the right hand side and I also hate being in crowds/supermarkets for exactly the reason you say. I also found driving to be fine pretty soon after I was allowed to start driving again. I'm selling my 7.5 ton horsebox and getting a 4.5 ton one - although I am so old I'm still allowed to drive the 7.5 ton and I'm fairly confident I could do it, the 4.5 ton will just be easier for me to drive. Luckily I can just about pour wine ok ;-)

Thanks so much for your good wishes, all the best of luck :-)

Gamebird said:
I haven't posted on here for years, but thought you might benefit from my experience. I was completely blind in my right eye (although not through injury) for a period of about two years. I work with a lot of naughty young (and old!) horses on the floor on a daily basis, and compete at open team chasing and hunt race. During the time I was blind I continued to team chase (including coming second at the national chamionships) and took part in many hunt races, including the Melton Hunt Ride. I pretty much lost my ability to see a stride as I had no depth perception, but to be honest at that speed you don't have much time for that anyway. My team mates knew not to come up on my right without shouting, and my horse has never been overly reliant on my direction anyway as I've always taught him to think for himself when jumping.
I think I was slightly more wary handling naughty young horses, but I certainly didn't stop, just became more aware and careful, especially as you mentioned, the blind eye is generally the one closest to the horse.

Probably the hardest horsey thing for me was riding on the road - I was physically turning my whole head every few second to check for trafiic coming from behind as the blind eye is the one on the side of the traffic.

My main issues were walking into door frames - I cannot tell you how many times I did this, and I never got better!, and pouring wine. It is very hard to line up the bottle and glass with no depth perception, and several times found myself pouring it straight onto the table. I also developed a very strong dislike of crowded places, particularly supermarkets, and just didn't feel confident in places with lots of people. Driving was fine for me.

Luckily I have had an operation and can pretty much see again now, but it was a tricky time in a lot of respects. The two things I really felt it didn't affect were riding and driving. Good luck with your recovery.
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Hi Leo

Thanks so much for sharing your story, I'm so sorry for your sight loss. I hope it continues to improve.

I totally know what you mean about supermarkets and crowds. I absolutely hate being in busy crowds, especially fast moving ones. I just can't see who is coming up on my right hand side, and if they start bumping into you it's absolutely awful. I actually start losing my balance in supermarkets, it must be the stress. I got separated from my husband in a very busy pre-christmas crowd soon after the accident and people were repeatedly bumping into, it was dreadful.

I had a reversing camera fitted to the car - it has really helped. It's much better than the beeping things, because you can see on the screen exactly what's happening.

You're so right about making yourself do things. I had a lot to deal with fairly soon after the accident (young horses needing to move a long way away to professionals yards, a horse that needed to go to Newmarket) and I found myself having to drive long distances on my own. It was a bit intimidating, but I got through it. I find it better to keep busy, it stops me from dwelling on the eye loss. That's the worse thing of all about the accident, the fractures although extremely serious and extensive I will eventually nearly totally recover from but of course the sight will never return. I also can't yet psychologically deal with taking the artificial eye out, but I'll get there eventually. But I'm still here and that's how you have to think about it, I very nearly wasn't, and if he'd had shoes on I wouldn't have been. The surgeon also told me that 10 years ago I would have died from the injuries....thank goodness the treatment has moved on in that time.

I am very lucky that I've nearly got all my pre-accident life back, but I know exactly how you feel. You just have to focus on doing things one step at a time and getting there slowly.

Thanks very much for your good wishes, all the best of luck to you :-)

Leo Walker said:
I missed this the first time round. I had a haemorrhage and went blind in my left eye. Some sight has come back but its patchy and some days are much worse than others. I don't ride, I drive and have been fine with that, although my steering isn't as good as it could be! Obstacles and cones are difficult, but getting better. I'm wary if I'm in the field and they are galloping about, but that's not something that happens often.

I don't like supermarkets etc. At first I found them so disorientating that it made me sick but it has improved. I still hate crowds of people and would never, ever walk through one now. I find I have to have text bigger than usual, but that could well be a change in my vision in the good eye. I need to wait for another month before I know more about that.

Driving the car is fine although depth perception is terrible and I sometimes find I reverse park but don't go far enough back. I'm learning new techniques for things like that though.

Like you, I feel like things are getting back to normal, or my new version of it. The thing that I've found most useful is to make myself do things. I started by painting the garden fences. It was incredibly hard at first and I was sick and dizzy but my eyes adjusted and it was fine. This weekend I've built a chicken coop and a giant run. Horribly difficult at first and I threw up in a flower pot on Saturday! But again, by Monday afternoon I'd forgotten about my eyes, although I did have to have someone check my battens were straight. What looks straight to me wasn't!

I think its just one of those things that needs time to get used to and to adjust. I want my life back so am pushing myself hard, but you could get the same results much slower and with less throwing up!

I hope things continue to improve for you. Sounds like you are on the right track now :D
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Hi moleskinsmum

Thanks so much! Got my white armband ordered for dressage warmup & at least the worst side for me for not being able to see what’s on my right hand side in the warmup will be when I’m on the inside track.

I’m really glad I’m back riding again, I honestly thought I never would for quite a while (which was a horrible feeling). My next goal is to eventually ride the 6 year old again but I fully accept I may need to wait till he’s about 10 or 11 and has lost all the young horse “attributes” (!)

moleskinsmum said:
I have nothing useful to say other than lovely update and I am so pleased you are back in the saddle and making progress!
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