Facing the inevitable, words of wisdom required please. Thank you.

[Pegasus Rules]

Whenever I need to read horse related advice from others' experiences, I head to the H & H forums. So helpful. Now I need to post one myself.

I am facing the inevitable - a mare we saved from slaughter 19 years ago has been diagnosed with a suspected brain tumour. She has gone from a quiet, sweet natured horse, to one that has become frightening to be around. We have now had to turn her out as we cannot handle her safely. The Vet. has advised euthanasia as she is dangerous and unlikely to improve. We have now come to terms with that decision.

I would be most grateful to hear from anyone who has been faced with putting a horse to sleep who looks in excellent condition, and appears fine in the field, but as soon as she is confined in any way, either on a rope or in a stable, is completely unpredictable and dangerous to be around. She exhibits erratic, unpredictable bouts of jumping and darting about, spinning round in circles, with no notice and is completely out of control. I cannot even get a headcollar on her. Hers is an illness that affects her brain, not her body.

It is so difficult to put her to sleep when she was once so sweet, still looks well and doesn't show any signs of being in pain. But who knows what is going on for her? Any helpful advice would be appreciated. Thank you so much.

 

[paddi22]

That is such a tough one. But it is the fairest thing. it must be terrifying for the horse when she has a turn, it would be so stressful and a horrible thing for a horse to go through, she could seriously injure herself which would be horrific. And realistically someone could be seriously injured handling her - she will still need farrier, worming, vets etc and it doesnt sound like that will be possible. You sound like you have given her a great life, she was very lucky you rescued her and it would be a pure kindness to let her die with dignity instead of getting worse and worse. I had to pts one who looked in perfect condition two years ago, and it was tough, but it was such a relief when it was done.

 

[Pearlsasinger]

I am sorry that you find yourself in this position.
I thought I was going to have to do exactly the same, fortunately, we found out just in time that her behaviour was linked to feed and changed her diet.
You need to consider the horse's quality of life, just like the owner of any other horse. If you think that the horse feels well and is happy, then you don't have to make the decision just yet BUT, if you think she is in pain or frightened than you must do the responsible thing and put an end to her misery and confusion.
You saved her from those things 19 years ago and she has had a great life with you, now it is time to do the last kind thing possible for her.
It is never an easy decision and is almost always an emotional time but it is part of owning a horse.

 

[milliepops]

From what you've said OP it sounds like the horse must be quite distressed during these episodes and she won't have any understanding of what's going on with her.

It's the last act of kindness you can give her.

I supported a friend with something similar a couple of years ago, it was desperately sad, of course, but afterwards she could remember the good times they'd had knowing that the horse wasn't suffering any longer.

 

[FinnishLapphund]

I'm so sorry to hear about your horse's illness. But since you say that the brain tumour have already affected her behaviour so that she can't have a headcollar on her head, and that she can't be in a stable, or confined in any other way, I presume that it will most likely continue to change her behaviour.
The way I see it, you will probably feel bad regardless if you decide to do it one day too soon, or one day too late. So instead of thinking 'How can I do this now, when she still looks happy out in her field?' Perhaps you could think 'How can I wait, until she isn't happy out in her field either?'

{{{{Hugs}}}}

 

[meleeka]

The only advice I can give is that you’ll feel better once it’s done. Making the decision and waiting are the worst bits by far. I bottled out of the waiting but and phoned the vet the day I decided. That was easiest for me to handle and I did feel much better about it afterwards.

 

[AmyMay]

Any horse I've had put down have looked in excellent condition. However underlying conditions meant that they were not.

 

[Cortez]

I wouldn't hesitate for one moment to put this horse down at once, it must be horrific for her, poor thing. I wouldn't ever want to see a horse on it's last legs, far better to let them go before they feel, and look, miserable, surely?

 

[Snowfilly]

My friend died of a brain tumour. He'd have similar panic type fits and he said it was the most awful, terrifying thing he could imagine, and that the pain in his head during and after them was enough to make him think of suicide.

For your mare's sake, put an end to her suffering before it gets any worse or before she breaks a leg or neck.

 

[Red-1]

I have put two horses down who looked ready for the show ring. Neither was well though.

Personally I was pleased that I had the courage to make the decision to do the deed while they did look so well.

One was in pain enough to no longer laid down, but was actually sound at walk. The other was a wobbler. Both walked down the drive onto the lawn as if they were about to go into the ring at GYS.

Better than waiting until they are unhappy enough to lose weight, IMO.

 

[MiJodsR2BlinkinTite]

Five weeks ago we PTS the two oldies; they would have struggled through another winter and it wouldn't have been at all fair to expect them to go through it. We did them together, same occasion, same day, as they were pairbonded and one would have grieved without the other.

The day before they were PTS, it was a gorgeous autumnal sunny afternoon. We gave them a groom and a pamper session, they looked fantastic, in the peak of health and vitality with lovely shining eyes.

The vet was here the next morning at 8.15 a.m. and we did the job on a lovely crisp autumn morning.

MUCH better to have done this "job" say a month too early, than waiting and having to do it a week too late.

Am feeling for you OP, you obviously have a great deal of affection for this horse; but you know in your heart what you have to do, and to delay is going to make things a whole lot worse. What I sense from your post is that your mare is increasingly going to be distressed from this condition, and the longer you wait the worse things are going to get.

The hardest thing is actually ringing the vet (or kennels, whichever) to make the appointment. Once you've done this difficult thing, and made the appointment, you will KNOW that you have done the right thing and a kind-of peace comes over you.

You have no other option unfortunately; bless you, sending hugs, we've all been there and it never gets any easier.

 

[Ambers Echo]

I put my daughter's pony down 2.5 weeks ago. It was not the only option so I had to make a judgement call on current suffering versus possible future improvement. Even on the day I did not know if I called it right but I made peace with the fact that I acted in what I truly believed was the best interests of the pony. In your situation it is clear that you are definitely acting in the horse's best interest and it is the kindest option. It is the last final act of love and courage any owner can give their horses. Dignity and freedom from fear and suffering. My advice: don't delay but get the appointment booked now. Making that phone call was the 2nd worst bit of the whole process so get it over with asap. Arrange for it to happen as quickly as it can so you aren't waiting too long. On the day I just had to put one step in front of the other without thinking too much about what was happening till it was over. Then I lost it for a while. I had arranged to be with horsey friends who understand afterwards. And then I started feeling better. Once it was over there was a sense of relief and peace. I still feel very sad but no longer anxious. It's over and so the awful anxiety over whether and when has gone. So sorry you are in this position. Take care of yourself.

 

[FinnishLapphund]

My friend died of a brain tumour. He'd have similar panic type fits and he said it was the most awful, terrifying thing he could imagine, and that the pain in his head during and after them was enough to make him think of suicide.

For your mare's sake, put an end to her suffering before it gets any worse or before she breaks a leg or neck.

I'm very sorry to hear about your friend. And as you sort of mention, it is important to think about that there is a risk that the brain tumour is affecting her in ways which you can't tell from the outside.