Fantasy Three Day Event

Kenzo

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Shall we, shall we... oooow lets.... for a bit of fun have a fantasy three day event.

Right rules are:-

You a pick rider, absolutely anyone from the horse world, anyone from Fox-Pitt to an up coming young event rider, perhaps someone from the show jumping scene if you like...a jockey, someone you know or you can even pick yourself if you think your good enough, but you must explain why you have picked that particular rider.

Then, this is where you need to get thinking caps on, because your allowed to take 3 horses on your lorry, oh yes, one for each day (we'll bend the rules slightly
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), so you can have your pick of any horse for each phase, again you must explain why you picked that horse for that job.

You can if you like choose any rider/horse that is no longer with us today, good chance to praise our heroes etc.

Last but not least, you need a slave/gofa *coughs* ...sorry I mean groom, again anyone you like, could even be another event rider if you want to see them grovelling around, polishing your tack and shovelling sh*t.
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its completely up to you, again explain why you want that slave...sorry I mean groom.
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Right you are, off you go!!!
 
OOOOOOOH good one.

OK, well the rider is me. A taller, slimmer, more talented me, but you did say fantasy didn't you?

I wouldn't want a star grooming for me, I'll have my OH groom for me. This is the OH that is extremely horsy and wonderful, he always makes time to come and watch me at shows and looks after me and neds making sure everything is ready, so I don't need to get dirty.
- that might be stretching the fantasy a bit. lol

Besides. The heros that I might chose to groom for me will be competing against me as equals, which will be far cooler when I beat them
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Although, perhaps, could I have Mary King there as my trainer/mentor.

And I have been trying to think what horses, there's the obvious ones, starting with the sj, JW's Milton - a legend, Shutterfly, but do you know what? If this is a fantasy. I'll add a couple of hands onto my lad. I'll make him a little (lot) bolder, xc. He's already scopey & careful SJ, so with the extra hands we could do the SJ.

I produced him from a 4 year old, so with my imaginary tallness and talent and his imaginary trainable brain and love for dressage, we'll would obviously be working well at PSG, instead of novice.

It would mean more to me galloping through the finish on our dressage score, to applause and shouts from my friends & family, on my horse than any borrowed superstar.

However, my horse was cheap, so with that saved money, can I pitch up in Zara Philips horsebox?

I am sad aren't I? Better get back to work now... sigh.
 
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It would mean more to me galloping through the finish on our dressage score, to applause and shouts from my friends & family, on my horse than any borrowed superstar.



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my thoughts exactly
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However I'm bagging Zara's horse box!!!
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even if sh*tbag refuses to go in the dam thing, I'm still having it parked up my drive
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Oooh, fun.

Right, I will have Ian Stark as I have always had a major crush on him, and I think he is incredible. But if fantasy, please can we sub in Ludger Beerbaum for the showjumping... my future husband, sigh! Basically I have always wished I could ride cross country like Mr Stark, and would love to just be able to ride like Herr Beerbaum full stop. Amazing.

For the dressage I would like to have Rodney Powell's Irishman II - just thought he always looked really classy. Then XC it has to be Murphy Himself! And then showjumping I would have Classic Touch - possibly my fave horse ever. Or Jappeloup... decisions...
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To groom... I will have Matthew Wright please, as I have a sneaking jealous of him being so damn successful after remembering him as an annoying little tyke at Pony Club... so yeah, he can grovel for a bit...
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And for a XC course, I would pick and old style, big and bold, with petrifying drops and ditches which obviously Murphy would clear with no problem...

Ian would win of course!
 
Ooh fun! Much better than UNI work!

The course - A long format, old fashioned 3DE: Badminton,
Burlghy or Belton (grew up next to it, still want
to jump round one day....)

Rider - toss up between Andrew Nichlson (always admired his
riding), and a brazilian guy I know called Luis Serigo. He is a western rider and I would have to explain the concept of DR but he has a brilliant seat and can get the best out of anything.

Horses -
DR - would have to be Blue Hors Matine (see YouTube WEG
2006)
XC - Beaufort Maestro, my mums current horse, a XC machine
who will jump anything.
SJ - Well there are the obvious Milton/Shutterfly for a
garunteed clear but I would really like to enter Stroller
(just becasue, and for the power he must have had) or
Foxhunter (becasue he looks like a nice horse, and I
would like to see how he coped with a modern course.)

Groom - Well me! If I cant ride I would like to be involved
somehow!
 
My fantasy three day event would be a different! It would be a day's shopping - well sitting on a plush sofa in Harvey Nick's drinking champagne and eating strawberries while Trinny and Susannah (my lackeys) bring my the perfect clothes (free of charge of course) to suit my beautifully slim (we did say fantasy didn't we?) but feminine body. They would of course be banned from groping my boobs or slapping my thighs. Then an evening in a beautiful restaurant in the company of George Clooney wearing said clothes and spurning his advances (I am a married woman after all, and Brad my husband wouldn't like me going off with his best mate)

Day two would involve winning a big event (anywhere would do!) on my old boy (14hh Sec D - he would still be the same size!) He will have been delivered to the venue and prepared by my groom and general dogsbody Olly Townend (reckon he'd be good for entertainment as well) This would be followed by a victory party in a lovely marquee covered with fariy lights with all the people I'd just beaten and a load of my family and friends. Ryan Jones (Welsh rugby captain) would be my date for the night and wouldn't leave my side all night, except to get me more champagne and canapes.

Day three would have to be for recovery so a day at aluxury spa with lots of massages, treatments manicures and more champagne and strawberries. The masseurs would be various members of the professional rugby playing community - too many nice ones to mention!

Hw could there be a more perfect way to spend three days?
 
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