Feel cheated and a little angry .....

C

ColleenIsh

Well-Known Member
Joined
7 February 2007
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n.ireland
every thing is possible
Well just come back from the yard about 9.30 and was talking to yo who had said that c's owners where delighted with her and where happy with the rosette we gave them ( t got the trophy and the cup home) Anyways was pretty angry with what came next ... Yo asked if the owners daughter could ride her in the next show ( thats fair enough its her pony But I will not be leading her as yo and owner want me to do ) . I was doing them a favour by getting the pony fit and they (owners) where really happy for me to work with the pony and get her out esp as they are not showing people or remotely interested in riding the pony ( last time i see the people out with c was 4 months ago, and the last time they rode her was im sure a yr ago
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I feel that they are now only starting to infact I KNOW that they are only taking an interest now that i have got her working and out and about , They neednt think il be working with her just so they can just " get up and go " to a show, I will not be working with her, washing her , plaiting her or any other prepartations it takes to get her ready , I gave up work on saturdays to do shows with her , brought boys out to the yard with me to work with her , The whole point I bought my son new jacket, boots and hat was to do these shows with C , they neednt also think they are getting a loan of T's jacket or any equipement , they also need to get another bridle as I will not be loaning that out either .
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I know I may sound distasteful but I put alot of effort , time and money into that little pony and for them to " now take interest in her " well they can keep their pony and do the shows themselves will see how long it lasts
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Most of all Im upset for My son T who has fallen for cody and I dont want him thinking that if we are at the same show as them if they decide to take her themselves which i really doubt they will , I dont want him asking or thinking he isnt good enough for the pony and ask why he isnt riding her ( he is a sensitive little boy who will i know think hes done something wrong )
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Anyways sorry for my rant just felt like i had to get it out .... thinking of putting an ad in the paper for a show pony, games pony for T as he has really taken to it . hes such a little show off
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I am well aware of that , just dont think its right ..... they never showed an interest until I worked with the pony and got it where its at today .

I know its their pony and they are entitled to ride or do whatever they want with it , Its the cheek of asking me to take their little girl and do the lead rein class , Sorry but I wont be doing it , the point of taking days of work was to do it with my little boy and get the pony out .


I just feel angry and sad for my little boy thats all .

They have every right to do the show just dont expect me to take them .
I know the risks unfortunately
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I hate it when people do stuff like this!! I used to ride a horse for a woman when I couldnt afford my own, and she asked me to break in one of her horses as she had left it late and she felt she wasnt able to do it, end result being I put in all the work, with her constantly promising that the horse was mine to show/event when she was ready then decided to sell the horse!!! Got a huge profit from it, and never even said she was sorry!!! I do feel truely sorry for your little boy, and yourself. Its true that it is one of the risks that you take, but if people would just be fair and honest then noone would need to get hurt!!
 
Yes, that does seem a bit unfair but did you not get anything out of bringing the pony on yourself? Didn't your son? That sounds rather sad.
Obviously I don't know what the arrangement is with the owners; for instance, do you effectively have the pony on loan and footing all the expenses or are they paying entry fees/livery at all? Depending on the situation it's either very unfair or not really...
On a positive note I'm sure they'll lose interest straight away when they realise how much work goes into getting a pony ready for a show and then you'll have her back
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They pay livery , I pay entry fees, kitted out my son , bought browband , bit, been adding soya oil to her feeds, transporting her myself basically bits and peices even went as far as to sort a proper saddle out for her, gave up saturday work to take her to shows, never asked for anything .

Of course I enjoyed bringing the pony on but why should I bring a pony on for "them" to enjoy the outcome ? If they want me to bring the pony on for them well then they can pay me :P
It angers me that they have now taken a sudden interest in the pony wheras before the pony was just an ornament in the field .
 
Honestly, I think you got yourself quite a good deal there although I'm sure it is (or will be!) very upsetting for your son and very annoying that they've gone back on their word, they ARE within their rights.
And now you've made it look exciting and fun!
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Don't worry. I'm sure they'll lose interest just as quickly as they found it once they realise the pony doesn't clean and tack itself up. And your stuff is your stuff, so there's no reason they should use it!
 
Oh I know I have had a "good deal " like i said its just the way they have gone about it , me doing all the hard work and them having the glory as such , I mean the shows is what I work for and for my son .

But hey ho its their pony . :P

Been looking about getting my son a pony , he did have one , which was a great little pony but chased kids out of the field lol , so may be on the look out
 
If the pony is decent, then why not offer to go half with the owners. Chances are that you will end up with your son riding more and getting more out of the pony, and at least you know what you are getting.
 
I think you need to have a level headed conversation with the owners. Say that you have been told that they want the daughter to ride at shows and point out that this requires commitment and practice away from the show ring too. Explain just how much work is involved in the preparation - so far maybe they have only seen the results and we all know that is just 1% of the whole deal.

If they want the ride at shows then the only approach is the 'my work is done here' line, because success at the show is the prize for months of preparation. I suggest you hand it back on good terms though because they will for sure ask you for help again when they realise how much work it is, then you leave yourself a choice.
 
How about saying you have a busy week coming up so 'no problem' it's a good thing they want to do it. Cheekily say that half the fun is in the preparation and you hope they enjoy it as much as you do.

As for your stuff, it's yours NOT theirs.
 
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If the pony is decent, then why not offer to go half with the owners. Chances are that you will end up with your son riding more and getting more out of the pony, and at least you know what you are getting.

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FMM to be honest I dont think that would work out very well, they arent very knowledgable people in my eyes , the pony was bought by the little girls grandparents really not knowing what they where getting themselves into in my eyes , the pony was left in the field after the novelty wore off, I think we would probably be disagreeing in alot of things . I personally would like the pony to ourselves
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Sounds selfish but I like to do things my way esp when I know its the right way .
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The_watcher thats exactly what i was thinking and will do .

I am actually thinking of asking them would they sell her , I dont mind if the little girl came down to ride her or came to see her as she would be staying exactly where she is , but then least I would have ownership and do whatever with her without all this hassle . They have been wanting to sell before so would be an idea to ask owners if they would sell
 
It just really goes to show the importance of getting full agreement when sharing someone else's property. I can see their point as well, they want their daughter to get some of the fun and glory as well since they are probably thinking it is their pony. Maybe they just want her to experience it at least once and not take over from you. Who knows. I would get my own pony or lease one, if you dont have a proper agreement there is always a danger of something like this happening. To be honest, I thought it was a post written by a 13 year old at first, not having any experience of the lead rein showing business.
 
I can understand why you feel this way.

I know someone who is quite frankly a pants rider and refuses to believe its her and not the horses. She has gone throught 3 in the last year and gets them her mum does all the yard jobs and hacks the horse and she only turns up for shows. The Horse she recently did her first HT on was brillaint for her and looked after her and she went clear in the 2ft6 then did the pairs. She then pushed her luck and did the 2ft9 which was a big course and her horse stopped and she got really angry with it. She fell off as the horse was tired beings its 3RD!! xc round of the day. She now think the horse isnt good enough and has another horse on loan and her mum is looking after them both.

What makes me so mad is ive had good and very bad times with my horse but we have stuck together and worked through it and built up our relation ship together and when things go wrong i look at myself before i lay any blame and im always at fault.

Some people just want the rewards but deep down its the likes of us that are true horsemen ( well woman ) and take pride in the fact i dont give up at the first sign of trouble and work through things.

Take heart in the fact you got them there
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I understand why you are so put out, but I can also understand the owners points of view as, at the end of the day, it is their pony. Yes you have put loads into the pony but the other side of the coin is that they let you use their pony and, as they are paying the livery bills, they are perfectly within their rights to ride the pony themselves. On the bright side, at least they asked you if the daughter could ride it and did not just tell you that this was going to happen (which they could have done).

I do feel for you but this sort of thing does happen all the time in these circumstances.

Think positive, you are more than likely right that the shine will wear off and their child will soon become bored.
 
[ QUOTE ]
It just really goes to show the importance of getting full agreement when sharing someone else's property. I can see their point as well, they want their daughter to get some of the fun and glory as well since they are probably thinking it is their pony. Maybe they just want her to experience it at least once and not take over from you. Who knows. I would get my own pony or lease one, if you dont have a proper agreement there is always a danger of something like this happening. To be honest, I thought it was a post written by a 13 year old at first, not having any experience of the lead rein showing business.

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I have already stated it is well within their right to ride THEIR pony ,
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However I will not be doing the work with the pony anymore and for them to turn around and say they want to ride at the show..... they want to ride at the show they put the work in themselves afterall thats only fair .

Your last bit of the post I really didnt get
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call me a 13 yr old I dont know
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please explain thankies :P
 
I can see your upset, but as you said these people havent the first clue. Their little girl wanted a pony to be posh on and they haent the faintest how to realise her dream. they bought the pony and sudenly realised they didnt know HOW to do it. Their approach may seem rude, but I really think it's just that they havent the faintest idea of the work that goes in.

TBH as you said, this is about the children, and that includes their child. In essence, atm you have a ponio your kids can ride, and you don't have to pay a penny. Can you not strike a deal that if your son can ride him in classes, their daughter can do the next show etc etc, and in return for the free pony you'll do the work?

The other side of it is, that you buy a pony for your kids, Cody goes to pot in the field and the little girl misses out via her parents lack of knowledge.

C'mon, be sporting here!! even with your kids having their own pony (if you decide to buy) , could you not offer to SHOW the parents how to do things? It's a shame for the little girl to miss out on all the fun she could have on this cracking little pony.
 
Sorry katy - have to disagree with you here. I think you have come up with a level headed solution but the parents don't seem to have a good attitude and sound like they will be difficult to work with. They only want to take the pony to a show because they think it is going to be easy to win a prize. They weren't interested before. Producing a pony takes a lot of time and effort, and it is all very well expecting CIHM to take a grown up attitude, but children can't - they can't see things in the same way as an adult. The more CIHM does to get the pony looking and going correctly, the more the owner will want their child to ride. Then, come winter, I expect that CIHM will be "allowed" to have the pony back again.

If the parents want to learn, then let them learn. The same way that everyone else had to. Lack of knoweldge is no excuse for their demand that their child now gets "a go". Yes, it is their pony, but they were happy to ignore it when they thought it was useless.

I think CIHM's idea to buy the pony may be the best one, but it will obviously now be worth more than they paid for it as it is out and going to shows!!!!!
 
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