Feel like I'm turning my back on horses :( Silly?

dressagelove

dressagelove

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Ever since I was a tiny girl, horses have been my life. That was my existence, my reason for being. I took BHS exams, I competed, I never went out, it was just horses. I thought about equine college, but ended up going working for an eventer. My whole life was geared towards a horsey life, it was all I wanted.

But I recently think I have changed, I realised I want money, so realised I would have to get a 'proper' job, and until recently, there has been nothing I wanted to do as much as horses, so felt a bit lost. I went to uni to do a degree in environment, as have always been a bit interested in it. Well I think I have found my calling, I love it, and can see myself doing it and making a difference. It means a lot to me now, and although I intend to keep horses for the rest of my life and compete, I still feel like I am betraying them, I know it probably sounds really stupid... :(

If horses paid well then I would do it! They will always be my number one passion, but I think I am understanding life a bit more, and what it is going to have the entail for me.
I going to feel so guilty having to go and work long weeks instead of being with them.
And in the future, I want kids, then I really will have no time for them :( Although I am quite happy in the direction my life is heading at the moment, I feel like a betrayer, is this completely stupid to feel like this?

Sorry for my waffle if anyone understands what I am on about!
 
I do understand this. I started young and have always had horses. I was dissuaded at an early age not to pursue a career with horses if I wanted my own and look after them and to be able to afford my own home. I knew how hard it was to work with them. I chose to do something else entirely I loathe it and would far rather work with horses. I do though do my horses my way and can afford my mortgage payments. I do not have kids. I could not have afforded kids and horses. You do have to make choices in life and there is no right or wrong answer. Just follow your instinct as far as you can.
 
I don't think you are turning your back on them, everyone needs to move on and up and if you need more money then so be it, i work part time with horses, part time employed as horses alone just dont pay enough :(

It's also fair that you want kids so your time will be limited, i don't however think its fair that u say u will have NO time for them, Unless however you have decided that you no longer wish to have horses in your life which is totally ur choice.

Time will be limited but you just need to make time for them. I go down at 7am do rugs and a couple of jobs, go to work till 2pm, go to the yard till 7pm-ish doing mine and others i look after and then sometime do self employed work some evenings. Yes it is hard and i hardly ever get any TV/Sofa time but i am willing to do it to have my horses. I also have 2 day loans on each of them to make my life a little easier :-) and give a little income for them. :D
 
Most of us have been there, at one time or another! So dont feel silly :D
I used to be the same, all I wanted was to spend my life with horses, have a career with horses and paid no attention to anything else. When I hit 18, after many failed attampts with apprenticeships on livery yards, riding school's etc I decided that I needed to broaden my horizons so instead of going to college to study equine (something I had originially been interviewed for and offered a space for at an argricultural college) I decided to study Animal management in general which had aspects of horse behaviour and things included. After a year, I came to the very real realisation that if I wanted to work with horses I would never be able to make good money in it UNLESS I ran a very successful livery yard or the likes, but even then I would earn no where near the amount I would working a "normal" job.

I then, unfortunately, was made redundant from my 3 day a week job which was funding college and had to leave college to get a job due to finances. After 6 months out of work due to the recession, I luckily came across a good job in sales admin, I have now been in it for 3 years and still love it! I can afford my horses, a very large and unexpected vet bill was no problem, a nice car, I can start saving for my future i.e house, family and can still enjoy my life away from horses and have nice things, so can my horse!! ;)

For me, having a well paid job and the money to keep my own horse and enjoy her was the best choice!
It is a personal preference, and good on the people who work with horses and enjoy their job and wouldn't change it for earning more money! But for others this just doesn't work for them :rolleyes:

Good luck in everything!! :D
 
Don't feel bad you have to do what makes you happy.

You will have a job you love, good money and have more time for your own horses and to compete.
Unless you have a good sponsors or your own yard then working with horses is hard.
You will enjoy your horses more and benifit from them.
 
I did the same.

Left school at 16 to work with horses (moved across the country with just my 4yro mare!) and had a great time till I was about 20.

Realised I was never going to be the next Mary King and got a 'proper' job.

Now 25 and have a mortgage, a nice car and 2 horses on full livery.

The balance is perfect for me now, I get to really concentrate on the riding and training of my two horses and have a pension and a mortgage I am repaying so I am hopefully in a much better position for when I am older than I ever would be working with horses.

I don't feel guilty, I do wonder what I would be doing if I had stuck with the horses but am pretty happy with my lot at the moment :)
 
Don't feel guilty, working with horses, still liking them and earning money at the same time is not attainable for most people :)

Some days when I really struggle at work, being away, not seeing my horse for 5 days a week, week in, week out I do wonder what I am doing, but if I didn't work I wouldn't be able to afford my horse, and then I woudl have nothing to do at the weekends. That said - many people don't have the same staying away aspects of the job, which is great and terrible at the same time :p

And whilst my horse looks lovingly at me when I go to the stables (well, me or the handful of treats :rolleyes: ) I imagine when I'm not there I'm quickly forgotten when grass is in front of his face :)
 
Lots of women take time off from horses at some stage of their life. Life happens and you get on with it. Horses will still be there when you get back to them. That could be in ten years, in twenty or thirty years. Maybe never. Don't get stressed about it. You are not betraying your love of horses when you need to consider your own needs.
 
I know where your coming from. I too gave up work with horses for a 'proper job'. I am now a single mum, with a ft job, my own 14.2 i've had forever & daughters pony. I had to sell my dream horse when I became single due to finances & time. Daughters now 7, & because of time & finances I don't see me being able to compete again for a long time. I'm lucky that I have a pony mad child with her own, but if she stays interested my 'horse budget' will go on her, if she loses interest (unlikely) then my time will be spent with her other ways. Don't feel guilty, the way I see it those years of experience pay off even when it is still only a hobby, & who knows what the future will bring. Good luck
 
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