Feel stuck, not sure what to do

[brownhorse32]

Bit of a long story. My horse of a lifetime was PTS quite suddenly about a year ago. In the rush to not have an empty stable/while feeling quite broken, I bought a new horse. On the advice of an experienced friend, I didn’t have him vetted (I know, idiot!). Did however have my vet perform flexions/saw him lunge on hard and soft before cracking on with work.

He’s a nice horse to ride. Irish, good brain, handsome, good size, young. But incredibly bolshy on the floor and has a real attitude to handle if you try to move him around or tell him what to do. He’s kicked out at me, swung his bum and often tries to bite people/pulls faces. To ride, he’s an angel. Hacks and hunts like a saint, jumps anything, not spooky or silly and never hots up. However, I just can’t click with him. I don’t really like him and am begrudging the almost £800 I’m spending on him a month. I dread going up and have totally fallen out of love with riding/horses.

So I made the decision to sell him and felt relieved/happy. And then he started being incredibly sour in the school - he’s never been too happy schooling (he prefers to hack), but this was proper attitude - rearing, trying to kick people on the ground, pulling faces.

Got him booked in at the vets for a full work up, thinking it was ulcers. He scoped clear and was instead diagnosed with navicular in both front feet.

Currently finishing up the rehab, is sound and vet is very positive about his future.

However now I feel totally stuck. I don’t think we’re happy with each other: he enjoys hacking and hunting, whereas I bought him to event. I’m not sure how he’ll stand up to XC and plus, I don’t think he’s got the attitude to really try (or not compared to my old horse - and I’ve been *really* trying to not compare them). And honestly, I just can’t imagine myself being happy with him.

But how can I sell a horse with navicular? Is there even a market for young hack/hunt horses with this disease? He’s sound now but I wouldn’t want to sell without disclosing this. And as he’s such a good looking horse, I can imagine some people would sell on and make a lot of money (I bought him for almost 6k).

Obviously there’s PTS but that feels quite dramatic at the moment when he’s sound and marches out around the woods. But I’d rather do that than risk him getting passed from pillar to post…

I sound like an awful person and I want to make it clear that he gets - and will continue to get - the best care/treatment. I just don’t have ‘that’ connection with him. And I don’t know what to do next. It’s making me feel sick and stressed constantly, as well as just sad about my old horse, sad for this horse and just hugely guilty.

If it comes to it, I’ll keep him and just have a very expensive pet. I will do best by him, but equally this is what I spend all my money and time on, and I want to ride, compete and have a horse I love and enjoy.

So I guess I’m after any suggestions? Any reality checks? I’m just at a total loss and don’t know what to do.


Blimey - that was an essay. Thanks if you get this far!

 

[meleeka]

If you don’t need to sell him for financial reasons how about a loan home? Somebody could have a show horse or just a happy hacker without the long term worry of the progression of navicular. There could also be the optioning selling for a nominal amount if you are sure the loaner is a forever home. If you did go down this route you could decide that if he becomes unsound again and you had to take him back, you would pts, having already given him every chance of a happy life.

 

[Templebar]

If he is as you describe i should think there would be a market for him at a suitable price. There are many usually older people (not teenagers) who would look for something to do this job and be safe and sensible and i think they would be capable of taking on the navicular, if he is on the mend even better as its just on going care.

If you are not worried by the loss of value if you PTS then i would consider a loan or lwvtb which helps you keep security of his future while being able to go on yourself to something more suitable.

 

[Antw23uk]

Can't suggest anything more than the others have already put but what i will say is, stop being so hard on yourself. Sometimes we dont click with horses, sometimes we have a run of bad luck (and its a naff bit of luck for you!) if you arent enjoying him and you dont need to sell him to fund a new horse then loan him out as a happy hacker/ showing home perhaps but keep him within a certain mile radius you are happy driving to regularly to check him and have a water tight loan contract in place. If you have no luck then always remember that pts is not a welfare issue.

 

[irishdraft]

You might find someone who wants to do a bit of hunting over the winter so the ground would be soft and turn away over the summer could suit a horse with navicular type problem .

 

[sportsmansB]

I ma not sure what to do about the horse - maybe loan if possible? Many go on to lead full lives after a navi diagnosis, though obvs if you do sell it will impact the value.
On the other part - the 'not clicking' - I am SO with you. I lost my mare just over a year ago. Got another horse in the summer- absolutely perfect on paper. Perfect. Lovely to ride, well schooled and obedient. Easy in every way. BUT doesn't like hacking and I do. Bit lazy in the school but can throw the odd buck / big spook out of nowhere which is a bit unnerving. I just can't 'warm' to him - every day I wish I was going to ride my quirky, forward, keen mare who didn't do everything perfectly, but loved her job and found the bits that I find hard easy and helped me with them- while I enjoyed working with her at the parts she found hard. We were made for each other.
I am seriously considering selling my new boy (who has had the bad manners to put up a massive splint since I got him) and I don't know what to do either.
So, not helpful particularly - but you are not alone. I try so hard not to compare my two as well- but there is a wee bit of me that thinks that there is one out there who is more like her and who I would enjoy more, and like you its my hard earned cash being poured into this week after week, and we should enjoy it at least.

 

[vhf]

Life is too short and too precious to spend that much time and energy not enjoying it. There will be definitely another home out there where this horse fits perfectly, albeit not at £6k. Get him sorted elsewhere (loan/sale), then re-evaluate what YOU want from your horsey life, which might be a break until you trip over the right horse. Be kind to yourself.

 

[Carrottom]

If you are in hunting country I would definitely try to loan him as a hunter, possibly even to the hunt staff. His behaviour on the ground might limit his appeal to a happy hacker.

 

[SEL]

No need to keep him as an expensive pet - there will definitely be someone looking for a horse like him providing the price takes into account the navicular.

I've been given a very poor prognosis on bringing my mare back into ridden work so although I can't afford 3 until I can find cheaper accommodation for 2 broken horses (!) I would absolutely be looking for something that hacks nicely, can do fun rides and rock up to the odd polework clinic. There will be other people like me out there. If you're worried about him being moved on then loan him - it can always become LWVTB. Work on his ground manners in the meantime. I'm fine dealing with poor ground manners (my mare gave me plenty of practice - she was vile), but you widen your audience if you can improve his behaviour.

 

[bubsqueaks]

Nope you're definitely not alone so please take a deep breath - we are in a very similar situation with our 8 year old connie following failed ulcer treatment - he is currently turned away for 12 months before we have to decide next course of action with no ulcer insurance, daughter lost confidence following being broncked off, seriously talented but forward & fast pony - it happens far too often doesn't it & we have gone through the process of feeling cornered without options but are ever hopeful we can find the perfect solution for us all. We too will look at loaning, project purchase, if he scopes clear but if he doesn't our options are another 12 months turning away or the worst & last resort PTS - its tough but we too just haven't jelled with him - he doesn't trust us & we don't trust him granted its because of his pain we find ourselves in this situation but once the trust has gone its very hard to get it back.

 

[Identityincrisis]

Your post could describe my current situation, except I'm coming up to 5 years with my horse.

Everything you describe, I lost my horse of a lifetime, rushed into buying another, AWFUL on the ground, good to ride (once I backed him) just didn't gel. 9 months ago, following 2 of my injuries caused by him, he was diagnosed with Navicular. I have seriously considered PTS and it is still an option if I can't get him sound as with his various issues I couldn't pass him on as I could never forgive myself if he was passed around (highly probable with him!)

 

[brownhorse32]

Thank you all for such kind and encouraging comments, it’s so appreciated. Think I’ve just got myself too wrapped up in this and can’t see the wood for the trees!

While it would be useful to have money from his sale to buy a new one, I don’t necessarily need it so loan/lwvtb would be an option - I would just struggle if he got sent back and I had another! And of course all the horror stories you hear... even though I loaned for years before buying my own and know there are plenty of great homes out there.

SEL - I’m working on the ground manners but it’s a long old slog. He was a pet up to age 4 and quickly learnt he can dominate people so it’s been a big shock to him (and me - my old boy was wonderfully mannered).

Identityincrisis- sorry to hear you’re going through the same (and to everyone else in this position who’s replied). I feel the same - Id much prefer to PTS than risk him getting passed around or sold on as a quality high level comp horse etc. Hope you manage to find the right answer for you both.

Thank you, you’ve all given me the hope to try to find him a good home where he’ll be loved. He really is a sweet boy who’s desperate to be your friend - I just don’t think that can be me.

 

[ester]

Was he MRId for the navicular diagnosis?

It’s a diagnosis that many make a full recovery from with the right rehab.
I would absolutely consider selling him to a hunting home.

 

[bubsqueaks]

Good luck - really recommend lots of groundwork we swear by Richard Maxwell techniques & halter. Also Ive heard great things about barefoot & Navicular!

 

[Ouch05]

Having lost my old boy last year and still have my comp horse, Your boy would be a perfect partner for him and me. My OH and I want to ride but I don't want to buy again not yet if ever so yes there are people out there that would loan. So I think that is a great option for you.

 

[brownhorse32]

Was he MRId for the navicular diagnosis?

It’s a diagnosis that many make a full recovery from with the right rehab.
I would absolutely consider selling him to a hunting home.

He was initially x rayed and given rehab instructions based on that, with the plan that if insurance would pay for an MRI (still waiting to hear) and he didn’t come sound from the initial treatment then we’d MRI. I’ve read up a lot about it and know x rays aren’t the best for diagnosing and really he’ll need an MRI to see what’s going on.

Thanks Ouch05, it’s nice to hear that he should find a lovely home!

 

[Identityincrisis]

Good luck - really recommend lots of groundwork we swear by Richard Maxwell techniques & halter. Also Ive heard great things about barefoot & Navicular!

Highly recommend RM! He came out to my horse, all be it not for manners but loading, but I apply the same principles and it really does work, the man is a genius

 

[twiggy2]

I would pop him out on full loan.

 

[brownhorse32]

Thanks - I’ve had Richard Maxwell out before for my old horse but didn’t think to get in touch with him! Best dig out my old halter and DVD!

What’s the best way to go about finding these loan homes? Word of mouth or actual advertising?

 

[ester]

Word of mouth always better if you can

 

[ihatework]

Thank you all for such kind and encouraging comments, it’s so appreciated. Think I’ve just got myself too wrapped up in this and can’t see the wood for the trees!

While it would be useful to have money from his sale to buy a new one, I don’t necessarily need it so loan/lwvtb would be an option - I would just struggle if he got sent back and I had another! And of course all the horror stories you hear... even though I loaned for years before buying my own and know there are plenty of great homes out there.

SEL - I’m working on the ground manners but it’s a long old slog. He was a pet up to age 4 and quickly learnt he can dominate people so it’s been a big shock to him (and me - my old boy was wonderfully mannered).

Identityincrisis- sorry to hear you’re going through the same (and to everyone else in this position who’s replied). I feel the same - Id much prefer to PTS than risk him getting passed around or sold on as a quality high level comp horse etc. Hope you manage to find the right answer for you both.

Thank you, you’ve all given me the hope to try to find him a good home where he’ll be loved. He really is a sweet boy who’s desperate to be your friend - I just don’t think that can be me.

I had one in not dissimilar circumstances.
Young, good looking, nice type.
I just couldn’t get on with him.
He then went wrong behind and had the PSD op.
So I was in pretty much a similar position to you.
I didn’t really want to just loan him as didn’t want him back. Equally I didn’t want him to become dealer bait.
I did a LWVTB and it all went smoothly - issue disclosed. 8 week loan. Sale for 2.5k completed.

 

[brownhorse32]

I had one in not dissimilar circumstances.
Young, good looking, nice type.
I just couldn’t get on with him.
He then went wrong behind and had the PSD op.
So I was in pretty much a similar position to you.
I didn’t really want to just loan him as didn’t want him back. Equally I didn’t want him to become dealer bait.
I did a LWVTB and it all went smoothly - issue disclosed. 8 week loan. Sale for 2.5k completed.

Wow, really similar!
How did you go about selling him? Were you upfront with the issues or wait for people to get in touch and then explain?

 

[ihatework]

Wow, really similar!
How did you go about selling him? Were you upfront with the issues or wait for people to get in touch and then explain?

I advertised him on horsequest as LWVTB. Stated his price and, from memory, said something along the lines of ‘due to vet disclosure’, then told interested parties the detail over phone/email. I had a reasonable amount of interest.

 

[honetpot]

Many years ago my first horse had navicular. He was on loan to me, as he was LOU, and they didn't want to sell him. There was not the knowledge and no real treatment then, so I just kept him in balanced steady work hacking and then when we moved took him hunting.
He was a horse that I never could have afforded to buy and we had nearly 10 years of fun together on no bute. He was good on the ground but perhaps when your horse is managed he will get less grumpy, and barging I have found often comes from anxiety at being left, or cornered. You never know what has happened to them before you got them.
I would try and find a loan home and have him freeze marked LOU.