Feeling fed up...

M

Merlotmonster

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Well I got on my horse today for the first time since breaking my leg in November. Had to have a shove up the backside to get on as have not a lot of movement in the ankle still so a rather undignified mount!
Just wanted to walk round, but my other horse managed to break free from where he was tied up and galloped up and down the drive next to the sandschool. Soloman then decided he was going to canter sideways. I had no stirrups as cant actually get my foot to bend in that direction yet.
The depressing thing is that I felt real fear and decided to get off! I felt rather pathetic afterwards as its not as if I would have fallen off, I just felt really unsafe up there.
Now Im all depressed and feel as if I have lost my confidence.
pointless post really...was just really looking forward to having a sit as it is such a lovely day.
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You’re still injured so its natural you are going to have a bigger sense of self-preservation and be more cautious. Stop giving yourself a large time, your confidence will return as your mobility improves. Honest!!!
 
I was EXACTLY the same when I got on again after breaking my leg, took a few attempts to really feel happy again. I did the same, rode without stirrups firts as couldnt bend my ankle at all, ride something sane for a bit and just amble about, I made myself do this, however boring it may be, managed a couple of rides and then got back on my nutter, I am now fine again, but stil parinoid about that leg.

Please dont be hard on yourself
 
oh dear it must be so hard for you, but perfectly understandable especially as you are still injured. I know you may not want to but what about getting a good friend to lead you or lunge you in walk so you can have a chat and hopefully enjoy being back on board? {{hugs}}
 
My sister broke her ankle at the end of may 07, didn't get back on at all until between christmas and new year, then just sat on the big girl, as she couldn't get on before then (mare is 17hh). She has had some lessons on a mechanical horse, which means that she can just concentrate on sitting properly and build up her muscles. We have been out today on the flesh and blood ones, for the fourth time since christmas (partly the weather and sisters worry about being able to control the beast in high wind) and had a great time. We set off with the neighbours then split up, as we only went round the village and they were going further. It does get better
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You'll get there - just take it slow. I busted my knee skiing and as it meant I had no control over one side of horse & could only push one way (bit dangerous on roads as good leg was away from cars so I could only push into traffic) I sort of stopped riding for ages & even once op done & all OK took ages before I felt safe enough to chance riding on a road again. Just think positive - as gorgeous george suggest can you find someone to lunge you while you cjat - it's amazing how someone else having control can improve your confidence and you'll need time to regain full fitness.
 
cheers all...will prob try again this week but this time make sure the other horse is in. Neither of my two could be described as quiet unfortunately! I know I shouldnt rush it as its a long recovery, just felt really fed up coz I really want to be back on and wasnt expecting to feel nervous as Im usually a confident rider.
Thanks for your advice.
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Oh dear, I really feel for you. After a nasty break and three months off its perfectly natural to feel anxious. I have seen those piccies and I know you will be back as the lovely dressage diva before you know it
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Dont beat yourself up, it just means that you are learning the art of self preservation!

Next time will be much better and tomorrow promises to be a beautiful day again, dont leave it too late to do it again
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Don't underestimate how big a deal breaking your leg is - apart from the bones healing there will have also been damage to ligaments/muscles and it takes a lot out of your body to repair all this. I broke mine in 3 places in August so I know what you are going through. Take your time - do a little bit as often as you can and have someone on the ground with you - even if they are just there to chat to. Put a neckstrap on if you feel it gives you a bit of security and don't overface yourself. Let us know how you progress - it takes a while but riding will help strengthen your leg and in a couple of weeks you will have your foot back in the stirrup and will feel like you used to
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