Feeling like throwing in the towel- lame again!

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angel7

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I'm feeling a bit rubbish as mare is back to being v.lame today *sniffs*.

Really Long rant but I feel I need to offload.

History-I have brought on loads of problem ponies over the years but this time I was looking for my forever horse. I saved and searched for a year, rejected loads, before I found my ideal horse in April -beautiful 4 yo maxi cob mare, just lightly backed, hacking out nicely, she was delightful and filled my head with dreams of showing her top level.

After just a couple of weeks lunging and longreining she appeared footy- thought it was the hard ground.

Took her to local show for a walk about and she was horrendous in trailer- nearly tipped it over. Got her reshod and she was horrendous to do, 16H heavyweight cob rearing all over farrier.
All this put down to young horse just starting out, not used to the real world. She is super sweet natured, tries to please and has a huge personality that draws complete strangers up to her to say hello. Several experienced folk seen her and agreed, not lame or naughty- just an inexperienced young horse with separation anxiety.

Then she started tripping and looking uncomfortable on circles. Within a month of purchase and only ridden about 6 times, she was nodding lame.
Vet treated for jarred up legs/ bruised soles as ground was like concrete. Not much better and Ava miserable after 2 weeks box rest and 4 bute a day.
Nerve blocks revealed actually lame in both front feet. X rays revealed large bone cyst in RT fore coffin joint- inoperable due to central location. The bone inside the cavity had "imploded" thus causing the severe lameness 6/10.
The left leg was sore from compensating for the right 1/10 lame. With hind sight obvious previous behaviours all pain related.

Que 2 months box rest in heart bars, lots of Cosequine and 1 IV dose of Tildren. This was awful in the hot summer weather. Her hind legs swelled and cracked from being in (she likes to chew off stable bandages), despite careful painstaking bandaging she developed weeping bandage sores. (I'm a nurse so I know how to bandage well). She got 2 capped hocks despite being on rubber matting with shavings and deep straw bed on top, bandaged and hock boots on. She got capped elbows from the lying down with the heart bars on, despite sausage boots and a mega deep bed.
She put up with all this so stoically,always bright with a hello for me, it was the only thing that cheered me up.
By the time box rest was up evrything seemed fine.

Appeared sound and by this time Ava very upset at being in all summer. Allowed out in school and paddock after reassessment by vet. She floated around the arena and I actually cried she looked so happy and well.

Within days lame again although only 2/10 in the right fore and only on/off.
Vet advised Dr green and a months paddock rest to allow joint to harden and settle.

Last week she pulled heart bar shoe off of the good leg (frantic search for 4 hours in rain to find shoe so farrier could put back on quickly next day). Yesterday she pulled shoe off the bad right foot and was immediately 5/10 lame. Couldn't find shoe this time and usual farrier is on holiday. After frantic calling of farriers I got someone to fit another one late last night. Ava was difficult and farrier hurt his back but at least got shoe on.

Today Ava is as lame as she was 3 months ago.

I just feel so disheartened and miserable, I feel like crying everytime I look at her.

I am financially and emotionally exhausted. I've tried to do everything right- she is under the care of a top ortho vet and excellent farrier who both believe she may come right in time but I dont think I can bare the wait. Arthritis, cartilage damage or another implosion are real possibilities to current lameness. Vet is going to re xray on Friday to look for changes and consider options.

I know I should wait and see but I cant help but worry what the options are:

Medicate the joint for a short term improvement with steroids, HA, adequan, cartrophen or the like - vet not convinced but may be willing to try if insurance will pay for it (am getting near limit, and worried about risk of laminitis and joint infection). Also I think this may just prolong the agony- she might start to come on well then be lame again but without the insurance to treat it.

Turn away for a year (would still need costly shod and done every day, in at night due to ground).

Put in foal and try to salvage some money by selling foal next year ,dont like this option as I dont agree with irresponsible breeding and I think market has collapsed for youngsters and will only get worse next year. However I've already lost 3K and really need to get something back to help financially. (I'm not insured for LOU).

Give to Blood Bank for happy retirement - I have done this with another horse and am happy with his care, we have one near us with good reputation. I wouldn't be able to afford to buy another horse for years with this option.

Sell on as brood mare/ companion only with full disclosure.- Difficult as she's rubbish travelling, cant be left alone without another horse and needs careful shoeing to stay paddock sound.

Put on breeding lease/ loan for while - difficult to find right person willing to take on.

PTS, call it quits with horses forever as I have lost so much. This seems a waste if she might come right, but I dont want her sold on through the sales if I can't afford to keep her.

Congratulations you've reached the end of the sorry saga.
I think I've reached the end too...
Sorry to be so maudlin.
 
Knnow how you feel though my horse in comparison to yours doesnt seem to have had such a bad time of it. You have been through the mill havent you? Izzy tore her DDFT last year, had box rest, egg bar shoes with (after wedge shoes), hand walking, ridden straight lines, 2 x MRI scans and eventually turned out. Shes in ridden work now and so far so good. Insurance has just run out so really hope we dont go backwards. She does at times feel a little pottery but there are no navicular changes but she did have inflammation in her navicular bursa for which she had 2 injectons, the first one only lasted 2 months.

If I were you I would let the vet do the xraying and see what is revealed. If theres no real treatment offered then I would turn her away and see what happens. This will give you and her a break mentally and financially, and see what happens. Could you share a horse with someone else so you can ride? That would take the pressure off.
 
i personally would turn her away for 6 months and then reassess.

if she needs special shoes, it's unlikely that you'll make much selling her on as a broodmare as most breeders won't want to take on problems, and those that do buy her, yu run the risk of selling her to somebody looking for a bargain without the necessary experience to look after her.

all together an awful situation, i hope whatever you choose works out for you, it sounds like she's had an awful year herself- thank god she has somebody looking out for her like yourself, poor lady
 
Cont..... At least then you would be able to take stock and decided where you want to go from there. I think you are in the hands of the vets with regards to you options with breeding etc and I do agree with you that it would be irresponsible to breed any problems into a foal and as you say, the market is not so good anyway. Give your mare a chance to come right by herself if the treatment options are limited and prognosis guarded. She may come right and it may be worth investigating whether she could go barefoot in the field. Pulling shoes off wont be helping her, if you do need to keep shoes on then try overeach boots, these work for Izzy.

Good luck with it all. It is tiring worrying and I find myself fretting every time I see Iz running about the field.
 
Sorry your horse is having these problems, they really are soul destroying. I'm not sure I read that very thoroughly but I think in your situation I'd be turning away for a year unshod. If there is a fair chance of her coming right with rest you'll probably feel bad if you don't give her the chance. However I tend to think horses that aren't right at four when they've barely started work aren't likely to be sound at ten either. JMO though. Good luck whatever you decide to do. :)
 
I'm so sorry for what you are going through I really feel for you, chin up babe : )
just out off interest, did you buy from a dealer? If so how long have you had her before the trouble started? Was she vetted?
I just wondered if they was a route you could look into.
If I'm totally honest if she was mine I would pts, I know it's easier said when it's not your horse but I can see her as a horse which will just be passed on and on and have no stable life.
 
Thanks for kind words, I'm crying as I read them.
I bought her privately so no comeback really. I didn't get her vetted (i know, I know) but my vet assures me that only x rays would have shown cyst and many horses have cysts and are sound with them.
She has never had any heat, swelling or lumps present, and has good strong hard feet although very flat.

I cant pull her shoes off to turn away as she is crippled without them, farrier not against barefoot but believes its not an option for her, I agree. Her feet are enormous - 19cm by 17cm, I doubt I could get boots to fit.
She is out with 2 pairs on overreach boots on in front, it was very difficult to even find one pair that fits her.

My friends think I am giving up too soon and she isn't lame enough to PTS. She potters about the field reasonably well and seems ok. I must admitt the thought of turning her away is tempting, but would need to find another yard as turnout is limited at current one, and it is excellent in every other way.

Think i will need to hold fast till Friday
 
Good luck for friday, will keep everything crossed for you. In the meantime have a look round for alternative accommodation for your girl. You may find a field thats cheaper than you think, ask at your Feed Merchants, ask your Farrier, ask on here if anyone know of one. Maybe she could go as a companion for another horse elsewhere. There will be options available. Turning away will probably be your best option if all else fails, I would give her a chance before PTS. Mother Nature can be pretty amazing you know! x
 
I'm really sorry for you, I know how you feel having struggled to keep my young gelding with OCD bilaterally in his stifles sound for over a year now. We have been back to square one at times too and its just so frustrating. We are working on our last chance really and if he doesnt stay right over the next few months will probably have to call it a day with him. Its very, very sad I know when you have invested so much hope and effort in them and I really feel for you. Good luck- let us know how you get on.
 
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