FFS sat here crying like a fool

McNally

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I just feel like i cant do this anymore.
My horse who i finally after 5 hard years wasnt for me and rehomed came back has since fallen badly and bust his knee meaning the last 3 months have been spent with an extra horse i cant afford on box rest. Im working extra to keep him stabled at work meaning ive not had a day off now for 12 weeks but not earned any extra money just spent a fortune on vets bills and general having a horse in 24/7 costs. I thought it was nearly better then arrived this morning to find he's gone way backwards Its the size of a football hot and sore again.
Daughters pony has been a nightmare for the last 5 months and although ive improved him to the point she can now ride him through fields and very quiet lanes he's lethal on proper roads and as everyone keeps pointing out come winter where we are there is only roads as the bridleway becomes in passable.
I had seen a field in a quiet location and thought we could get it but have just heard someone else i know is also going for it and has a far bigger budget so thats out the window.
So many people have offered to help me but then it just never happens and i cant keep asking i feel like such a *******ing faliure.
I cant go back to a DIY yard as the above injured horse is back and there is no way i can afford even very basic livery for all of them, Im only just affording the rent for my current little field.
Ive just had enough I cant remember the last time i enjoyed any of this and i cant see it getting better any time soon, Id been holding onto the fact that we *might* have been able to move them to this other field by winter but now thats gone aswell i have no idea what s next.
Sorry rant over just no one understands i keep getting told just to get on with it but i cant
 
We have its going to auction. I wasnt personally buying it but my O/h and his mum were and i would pay the £100 i currently pay a month toward their mortgage.
This other guy has £25k higher budget
 
We have its going to auction. I wasnt personally buying it but my O/h and his mum were and i would pay the £100 i currently pay a month toward their mortgage.
This other guy has £25k higher budget

Could this just be a bluff to stop you bidding?
Why can't your broken boy be penned where you are now and what will you do with him once he's mended?
 
Could this just be a bluff to stop you bidding?
Why can't your broken boy be penned where you are now and what will you do with him once he's mended?

I dont think so I hadnt told anyone we were going for it. It only came up in conversation as he was saying he knew full well that a builder was going to outbid him.

I had thought this- i do have stables there but its a case of the flies being such a marshy area (hence the bridleway not useable in winter) that the vet said he had to be moved to have any chance of stopping it keep getting reinfected.
No idea what i will do with him- He's a lovely horse I did find a sharer but she's since dropped out as this injury is taking so long to heal.
 
(((hugs))), I know it feels rough at the moment sweetie but it will get better. I can understand your frustration and totally sympathesise it does sometimes feel like a no win situation.

Don't be put off bidding for the field and if nothing else make sure the other bidder pays well over what you intended to, don't just let it go!

Box rest is a killer and this time last year I was going through it to. But keep hope.
 
Thank you x
Think its just all built up a bit and im being silly!
I dont know- My o/h still wants to go to the auction I just dont want to see my "way out" being sold to some other cheery git!
The other thing is the other bidder is my farrier who's an absolute star and helps me out no end as ive known him a long time and he knows im struggling so i really dont want to screw things up for him- He's a genuinly decent bloke!
 
If you don't go to the auction and it sells within your budget, you are going to feel worse! Also when it comes down to it you need to do what is best for you, not your farrier or other people. You can get through this!

And as far as penning in, if its not muddy at the mo then it might be worth a try? At least to see if it will heal - flies happen where its not so damp too, so is there a way you can rig up something like a fly mask but for his leg?
 
Its never dried out by us!I currently still have a boggy patch where is usually standing water- its that bad!
I could, Ive thought of a net curtain taped on or similar. Think will have to see how he is tomorrow. My plan was to try and get him home in the next few weeks as i thought it was improving but seriously it looks so much worse today im now not too sure.
The other thing with him is that hes a major worrier and if i take any of the other horses away theres a very good chance he will go thru the fence anyway. Another reason having him at work has been good- its a racing yard so the horses pretty much all live in and he always has lots of company but has never been able to get attached to any one horse....he's special like that- hence the reason he gets rejected by any home i try and find him!
 
If there's one thing about owning horses, it's that they are great character builders for all the adversity we have to face with them.

I'd definitely go and bid at the auction, you've got to do what is right for you and however nice the other bidders are, there is no sentiment in business. I'm sure your farrier would be pleased to see you get it if you need it more than him anyway. If that doesn't work out then I'm sure something better will come along in time.

As for your horse on box rest, I'm afraid I'd bring him home too, your needs are as important as his and if you're working all those extra hours it's bound to take its toll on you.

Above all try to keep positive, this is just a phase and will pass and things will improve, nothing lasts forever, but sometimes you've got to be proactive in getting what you want, so go and bid on that land and if it isn't meant to be know that something else will turn up. :)
 
Well you really are up against it. Time to sit down and take a long hard look at everything. You may have to come up with a coping strategy for this extra horse that is less than you would like to do.

Go for that field. Never mind the farrier is going for it too, it is dog eat dog out there :) Lady Luck will never come looking for you, go out and find her!

Honestly, 3 years ago my lovely horses were costing the earth, all sorts of problems and it was some kind of hell. Then a field came up and I moved. All of a sudden there were 3 other blimmin fields, all just as good. They were there all the time, I was too caught up in the daily grind and busy wringing my hands to notice them!

When I really want to beat myself up I remind myself that over a 3 year period I forked out £14,000 in field and stable rent and was absolutely miserable. £14,000 :eek: I could have gone on a world tour for that!

Hope some good luck comes your way - go for that field!
 
No wonder you're upset. 3mths with no time off is very stressful. It's a bit drastic, but since you can't put the horses somewhere else and winter riding will be rubbish, is there a possibility of selling the pony to a more suitable home (with bridleways but no roads)? Then you wouldn't be struggling so much financially/time wize. If you carry on working to maximum capacity and burn yourself out you'll be no use to anybody.
 
I think you can definitely make something with net to keep the flies off, don't let those little blighters dictate where you can be!

Defo go to the auction, maybe your farrier would let you rent off him for a short time anyway?

Good luck, better times are just around the corner I am sure of it xx
 
Sorry you're having such a hard time at the moment...things can only get better :)

If you still want the field then go for it. You will kick yourself if you don't even try. Maybe the farrier will have a change of heart and decide not to go to the auction. A lovely little yard came up for rent in my village, but we hesitated in going for it...too late someone else got in before us. I am gutted as I need to leave the yard we are on and now have nowhere to go.

Good luck to you for the future xx
 
You sound burnt out and not surprising if you haven't had a break for 12 weeks on top of all the other c**P going on that you are worrying about. I'm reading into your post that you can't see the woods for the trees right now. Don't 'just get on with it'. Take a couple of days break and come at it with a fresh mind.

Bid for that field, but it's not the be all and end all if you don't get it - there will be others. Bring your horse home and do your best by him - you can't eradicate all the flies in the world so don't beat yourself up about it. Replan your outings with the others so he's never alone (I think you have 3?)

Good luck with it all and look forward to reading your 'sorted' post soon!
 
^^^^^
This.

My thoughts exactly. You're so tired you can't think straight. You need a break. I know you need the extra money to pay for the horse but if you go on the way you are you'll end up having a break down. :(

Take a couple of days off, rest completely and then you'll be able to fathom things out better.
Go to the auction as if you don't you'll always be thinking ' What if?'.
Good luck and please get some rest.
 
If you don't go to the auction and it sells within your budget, you are going to feel worse! Also when it comes down to it you need to do what is best for you, not your farrier or other people. You can get through this!

This - you cannot just build on any old land you know. Have you an idea whether the land is green or brown belt? V unlikely that a builder would just buy it if it has no planning permission. If it does then I'm sorry it will never be in the budget of anyone wanting it for grazing.
 
Thank you lovely people!
I dont feel able to sell or pass on the pony as he was a very generous present to my daughter and has been fabulous til this spring so its obviously our, well my fault its gone wrong. Today i contacted the person who gave him to her and asked for help. I didnt want to but figure either she will sort him or will see with her own eyes that a child cant ride him on the roads.
I think im going to speak to the vet about my TB as at the moment i cant see him coming right and want a proper prognosis. He would never make a companion and i dont think he'd be happy doing nothing for ever more either. It seems stupid to keep trying to get him right if he's never going to be rideable anyway, on the other hand if i had decent grazing maybe he could just give it a try keeping him
I'd like to know where i stand with him so i can think about what to do there.
We will go to the auction i guess but will probably end up punching my farrier and being dragged away hysterical ;-)

Just been told i have to be in work for 6.30 aswell! grrrr
 
Right.

You have to have a go at getting that land because if you don't you will always wonder.

The pony, if it's not suitable for your daughter then you have to move it on. The person giving it to her will understand and is not going to want you to keep a pony that's dangerous.

The horse, I am not sure, sounds like the hardest problem to solve and might not be a palatable one :(

Lastly you sound under a lot of pressure with everything, take a deep breath, be kind to yourself, and if you can change something to make it easier, then do it.
 
i hope this gets sorted for you.

I'd def go and bid for the field, liek the others have said, of you don't try you won't know....

((hugs))
 
i hope this gets sorted for you.

I'd def go and bid for the field, liek the others have said, of you don't try you won't know....

((hugs))

Thank you x

I have asked the "pony giver" to come and ride him- said i need help and am stuck so they are coming this week (although its been said before)
I spent some time this morning with the TB at work and kind of remembered what i loved about him- although when i get him home he wont be the same but if i can find another sharer i would like to keep him and have another bash at it! sharers depend of course on him being rideable!

Things will get better as right now they cant be a heck of a lot worse! ;-)
Thank you all for hearing out my rant with out telling me to shut up!
 
We have its going to auction. I wasnt personally buying it but my O/h and his mum were and i would pay the £100 i currently pay a month toward their mortgage.
This other guy has £25k higher budget
You can't be sure.
I feel the same as you at the moment, just all too many problems with no solutions and no pleasure, let your close friends and family help you out as much as possible to make things easier. Just keep looking and things will turn around eventualy.
 
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