First family dog

[PSD]

So we have finally decided that we would like no more children. Well, OH actually said “another baby or a puppy?” So I then asked which breed of dog he would like….

In all seriousness though we are struggling to come to an agreement on which breed would be most suitable for our household and lifestyle. We are an active family, we regularly go for lovely long walks and obviously I have the horse and would love to be able to ride and take pooch with me. My eldest son is autistic so I would need a “forgiving” breed if that makes sense? Not something that is going to be climbing the walls with him, however I don’t mind a little ball of energy (such as a spaniel) as we are always out and about exploring.

Now I’ve always grown up with collies, absolutely love the breed but I don’t think this would be a suitable breed for us. They’re very loyal and trainable but from my experience they can be quite upset easily - this is the reason we haven’t taken my late mothers (and my childhood dog) collie in when she passed away. I don’t feel having an autistic child who can have meltdowns would be suitable for a collie.

Now I’ve suggested a Labrador or golden, OH isn’t overly keen. He wants a staffy, he’s always had staffys in his family. But THEN a friend of ours has the most beautiful spaniel puppies for sale, they’re the smaller type but I have no experience or idea of the breed apart from knowing they are little whizzy balls of energy!

So I guess I’m just looking for some advice really on the breed that people would suggest may be most suitable for us as a family, we won’t be getting one immediately as I want to make sure we’ve fully researched and learnt about the breed we decide on.

 

[Goldenstar]

I would get a Lab , magic dogs and I have never know one that was not like another sibling to the kids .
I grew up with labs , and I sometimes still, if I am upset , a fleeting memory a feeling of our Labrador Susan sitting next to me a warm solid presence comforting me .

 

[Spotherisk]

Labrador. They are just a delight. We have bred two litters of them, and the first litter are over ten years old. A bitch puppy was sold to a young couple who were pregnant, they had done their research and decided that a lab suited their very outdoorsy and active lifestyle. They had two more children and moved to Keswick. I see pictures of Inca fell running, swimming in lakes, SUP, being the stoic family pet, snuffling children… just a delightful situation, really heartwarming.

 

[Clodagh]

I have Labradors but I also think a well bred staffie would make a lovely dog for you. They are generally great with children, stoic and calm.
Spaniel, neurotic, clingy and hyper. Would one cope with a meltdown? Depends on the individual as with all dogs but I’d go for something calmer.

 

[Griffin]

I agree with Labradors or maybe a Labradoodle? You could look at a Shih Tzu if you want something smaller, they are a lot of fun. Staffies are often good for families. I agree with @Clodagh steer clear of spaniels, they are beautiful dogs but just too over the top I find.

 

[twiggy2]

Lab, staffie or a border terrier would be my choice

 

[TPO]

A show cocker spaniel should fit that bill. Complete opposite of working cockers; ideal first family dogs but still plenty able for an active outdoor life.

A few friends of mine have them and two families had them as first ever pets. They are active outdoor type families but dogs have also slotted right in and are quiet/easy going in the house, adaptable and have been easy to train too. One of the dogs goes out paddleboarding with her family. Their kids are now 12 and 10 but they've had the dog over 2yrs now

 

[PSD]

Thank you.

OH did have a Labrador as a teen and he was the most wonderful dog. Not much between his ears but he was great! I agree with the spaniel theory, maybe it would be too much.

@Spotherisk thqt sounds absolutely wonderful and just the kind of things we would love to do! I’d have to wise up a little on the breed. I do know basic knowledge about them and they are wonderful dogs

 

[Pearlsacarolsinger]

Another vote for a Lab, we've had loads but have also had a collie and JRTs, as well as Rottweilers. The only one of those breeds I would think would suit your family is Labradors, followed by Rotts except that I would never suggest a Rott as a first dog.
A family member used to have a lovely Staffy, whose temperament would have suited you but she had several health problems, so I would avoid.

 

[Thistle]

I've always had a staffie around my children, both have been rescues, both rehomed at around 1 year old. They are also known as 'nanny dogs' and have been great.
I also have 2 working bred labs and 2 spaniels, The spaniels are great but quite sensitive. The labs are easy. Perhaps the best fit if you want a large dog would be to go for a lab that has a mix of working and show lines, that way you'll dilute the 'drive ' slightly which will probably make family life easier.

Whereabouts in the country are you? I know of a litter due next week, dad is my fox red working bred lab with a fabulous laid back temperament and very trainable. Mum is a small yellow lab, mix of working and show lines. She's expecting 7 or 8, near Norwich, both parents are health tested. I would expect the males to mature at under 30kg and the girls at under 25kg. Pups will all be a shade of yellow, probably ranging from fox red to cream.

 

[AmyMay]

Lab or spaniel

 

[SAujla]

Labrador all the way, mine is my first ever dog and the she is much better than I could have ever imagined. She can be a bit bouncy but otherwise a delight in every possible way

 

[scats]

I’d say show cocker.
Absolutely gorgeous family dogs who enjoy lots of walks and exercise but aren’t as active as working cockers. So friendly and loving too.
There are several that I groom that I’d have in a heartbeat.

 

[AmyMay]

I’d say show cocker.
Absolutely gorgeous family dogs who enjoy lots of walks and exercise but aren’t as active as working cockers. So friendly and loving too.
There are several that I groom that I’d have in a heartbeat.

I agree. They really are fabulous dogs.

 

[FinnishLapphund]

Both a Labrador or a Golden Retriever sounds like a good choice for your family, as do Staffies, as Thistle said, they are called "Nanny dogs", and they didn't get that nickname for no reason.
All three breeds comes with different potential health problems, the Retrievers can e.g. have joint problems, with Staffies I think you need to make sure to find a breeder who avoids using parent animals with skin or allergy problems.

But if you want something less common, both a Finnish Lapphund, or a Norwegian Buhund, and probably some other Spitz breeds, too, could be suitable. A sibling to one of my late Norwegian Buhunds became an assistant dog to a severely disabled child who as I recall it, also lacked a bit of noise control.

 

[KittenInTheTree]

I would wonder if perhaps a trained autism support dog might be a better idea than a puppy. There are a number of UK charities which provide such animals.

 

[Karran]

Lab but a good cocker could also tick the boxes. Check out "anything is pawsible" on Facebook. She has an autistic child (mancub) and her cocker (fern) helps with meltdowns and is about the best friend for any child you could wish for.

They have been inspired to start a small charity to provide other Autistic children with support dogs (so far 2 and both cockers!) So might be able to help point you in direction of a decent trainer to help as well.

 

[palo1]

Irish terriers make wonderful family dogs and are well known for their devotion to family members - particularly children. I adore my chap and he is incredibly loyal but great fun. My children absolutely adore him and he charms almost everyone that he meets. He comes to work with me sometimes and is brilliant with my students - most of whom are autistic or who have ADHD. They are an unusual breed though so quite hard to find. You can read about them here: https://www.countrylife.co.uk/out-a...ursuits/irish-terrier-the-gentlemans-dog-9247 as well as here: https://www.countrylife.co.uk/out-a...untry-lifes-favourite-dogs-irish-terrier-1280

One of the greatest and most respected breed supporters is Lucy Jackson - she has produced this as an intro to the breed:

My only caveat would be that they are quite 'terriery' - or can be but mine has been an absolute joy and easier than the sight hounds, lurchers, spaniels and hounds that I have had previously. However with sensible training I think they are brilliant. Non shedding too!! I hope I always have at least one now.

 

[Moobli]

Another vote for a well bred Lab or Golden Retriever. The working bred types are active, athletic dogs who’d enjoy your lifestyle. Or if you wanted something a little more staid then a show bred or mix of working and show might suit.
Staffies are known to be very good with children but many can be a bit dog aggressive so that would put me off.

 

[CanteringCarrot]

I also vote for a Lab. I grew up with Labs and have one now. They're active and up for anything, but generally have a good off button too, IME. Really people oriented and fit in well with kids.

 

[CorvusCorax]

Lab.

 

[Tiddlypom]

I would wonder if perhaps a trained autism support dog might be a better idea than a puppy. There are a number of UK charities which provide such animals.

I was thinking this, too, rather than getting a puppy. It's a big ask for a puppy, even one with the most golden of temperaments.

 

[CorvusCorax]

While there are a decent charities, they often have long waiting lists.
Also beware fly-by-nights who charge eye-watering sums for crossbred dogs with very basic training and no back-up when things go wrong.
And whilst I agree that it can be very stressful for a dog to be an assistance/therapy dog (in any context) there are dogs out there with very solid/half dog-half sofa temperaments, you just need to be careful what lines you go for.
Horses for courses and all that.

 

[Clodagh]

I was thinking this, too, rather than getting a puppy. It's a big ask for a puppy, even one with the most golden of temperaments.

Maybe something like a failed guide dog?

 

[wren123]

We have always had labs and they are excellent with children and no trouble.

 

[Clodagh]

I know nothing about assistance dogs but I think OP just wants a family dog who won’t mind the odd meltdown rather than an actual assistance dog? Just one that will be ok with shouting and so on.

 

[CanteringCarrot]

Edit: actually my experience on the matter I posted about is possibly too limited. Nvm.

 

[SusieT]

Labrador
Wouldn't took any sort of poodle cross with a bargepole (often anxious/needy ), would not touch a show cocker with children (often possessive )
Labrador from a good tempered mother

 

[blodwyn1]

Ñeither of my working golden retriever s have been good with children, they have wonderful temperaments but had no experience of children when younger and certainly couldn't be trusted around them.

 

[KittenInTheTree]

While there are a decent charities, they often have long waiting lists.
Also beware fly-by-nights who charge eye-watering sums for crossbred dogs with very basic training and no back-up when things go wrong.
And whilst I agree that it can be very stressful for a dog to be an assistance/therapy dog (in any context) there are dogs out there with very solid/half dog-half sofa temperaments, you just need to be careful what lines you go for.
Horses for courses and all that.

Decent breeders will also have long waiting lists. The difference is that a properly trained assistance dog will arrive ready to slot in with the family, whereas a puppy will arrive ready to cause utter havoc in as adorable a way as is possible. I feel that first time dog owners aren't warned enough about this.