Frustrated - adopting a rescue dog

C

Clare85

Well-Known Member
Joined
28 May 2011
Messages
1,909
Location
West Sussex
Visit site
I had a stall at a charity fun day in mid-August. A couple of ladies walked past with a lovely dog, whom I was admiring. Upon chatting to them, it transpired they were from a local rescue. They had brought some of the dogs along to their stall to meet the public and try to generate some adoption interest.

The dog I was admiring was looking for a home. He was such a lovely, chilled out, sweet boy, so I took hubby and the kids over to meet him later that afternoon. We all loved him, he was fab with the kids, so they said we could go to the rescue to spend time with him/take him for walks to see if we were a good fit for him.

I contacted them shortly afterwards to ask if we could come over to see the dog. I was met with a very short and to the point message telling me I had to complete an application if I was interested in any of the dogs. Application completed that same day and returned. No further contact received from the rescue.

Chased a couple of times. Then yesterday, after another chaser, I get an email telling me that they must have forgotten to get back to me. However, now the dog we liked has bonded with another more nervous dog at the rescue and they have decided they can only be rehomed together. The email then went on to provide me with the mobile numbers of two ladies who rescue Kosovan and Romanian dogs.

It's so frustrating. My daughter keeps talking about this dog and we really felt he would be a great little addition to our family. We can't take a nervous dog due to the fact we have two small children, it just wouldn't work as my son can be like a whirlwind, so can't take the pair of them. I'm not sure if I'm just being fobbed off, but I'm not sure how the two dogs could've bonded so strongly in a few weeks that they now can't be separated. Anyone would think they don't want to rehome their dogs. Such a shame as I feel we could give him a really loving home :(
 
If rescues actually rehome their dogs they no longer have a lucrative source of income. That is my theory, as like you every time I have tried to rehome a rescue they have stopped it happening.
Such a shame.
 
I am with you on this one. My mum is in her 70s, but has had a dog for years, and when she lost her last one to old age she wanted to give another rescue a home.

She has had 2 dogs from the RSPCA, the first was many years ago, and we saw him and picked him up - no visit. He was happy until he was 14 years old.

The second was also RSPCA, but despite the fact we had already adopted, and she was taking on a young runt who was suffering in his cage with other stronger pups, she had to wait a week until they could visit. Fair enough, she did that. He was happy, also about 14 years old when he went.

Third was a Greyhound, from a lovely kennel in Sheffield. She visited, bonded instantly with a bitch, and they delivered a few days later, checking the premises as they did. Lucy went at 11 years old, which for a working greyhound is great.

She wanted another, but this time all kennels wanted her to visit numerous times to get to know the dog. She is not so mobile, but has 4 acres at home, and we are across the stable yard with our dog, so the dog has plenty of exercise and fun. She was happy to take an older dog. She was happy to nurse a sick dog. But, no one would let her adopt because she does not drive so far, and is not fit for many bus journeys followed by walking.

We were happy to drive her to look at a dog, but she did not want to ask us for numerous trips.

The dog's future was secure, as if she is unable to look after the dog any longer it would just move in with us.

After trying numerous "rescues," many of whom did not even reply to her enquiry, we gave up. I looked on Preloved, and got her a lovely young dog that had been ill, and needed strengthening up. We paid £100, but that included all of his stuff, from beds to jackets to carry cages, bowls, leads etc.

The old owners had young kids, and the sick dog was not able to cope with the kids. We only met the dog the once, they bonded in a trice, paid immediately, and now, more than a year later the dog is happy and a picture of health.

I do think that charities need to research the homes dogs are going to, as our first three did, but including a visit as nos two and three had. This last time though, the procedures seem to have changed so it was no longer possible for her to have a dog from them. It seemed to me that it was do-gooders getting a taste of power and liking it!

My advice - go to preloved! There was a selection.
 
Last edited:
Just playing on your emotions. No reputable rescue would offer a nervous dog to a family like yours.
 
Clodagh said:
If rescues actually rehome their dogs they no longer have a lucrative source of income. That is my theory, as like you every time I have tried to rehome a rescue they have stopped it happening.
Such a shame.
Click to expand...

It's so odd. Surely if they rehomed one, it makes way for another dog in need? I just don't get the logic. I think this "rescue" may just be hoarders tbh.

Red-1 said:
I am with you on this one. My mum is in her 70s, but has had a dog for years, and when she lost her last one to old age she wanted to give another rescue a home.

She has had 2 dogs from the RSPCA, the first was many years ago, and we saw him and picked him up - no visit. He was happy until he was 14 years old.

The second was also RSPCA, but despite the fact we had already adopted, and she was taking on a young runt who was suffering in his cage with other stronger pups, she had to wait a week until they could visit. Fair enough, she did that. He was happy, also about 14 years old when he went.

Third was a Greyhound, from a lovely kennel in Sheffield. She visited, bonded instantly with a bitch, and they delivered a few days later, checking the premises as they did. Lucy went at 11 years old, which for a working greyhound is great.

She wanted another, but this time all kennels wanted her to visit numerous times to get to know the dog. She is not so mobile, but has 4 acres at home, and we are across the stable yard with our dog, so the dog has plenty of exercise and fun. She was happy to take an older dog. She was happy to nurse a sick dog. But, no one would let her adopt because she does not drive so far, and is not fit for many bus journeys followed by walking.

We were happy to drive her to look at a dog, but she did not want to ask us for numerous trips.

The dog's future was secure, as if she is unable to look after the dog any longer it would just move in with us.

After trying numerous "rescues," many of whom did not even reply to her enquiry, we gave up. I looked on Preloved, and got her a lovely young dog that had been ill, and needed strengthening up. We paid £100, but that included all of his stuff, from beds to jackets to carry cages, bowls, leads etc.

The old owners had young kids, and the sick dog was not able to cope with the kids. We only met the dog the once, they bonded in a trice, paid immediately, and now, more than a year later the dog is happy and a picture of health.

I do think that charities need to research the homes dogs are going to, as our first three did, but including a visit as nos two and three had. This last time though, the procedures seem to have changed so it was no longer possible for her to have a dog from them. It seemed to me that it was do-gooders getting a taste of power and liking it!

My advice - go to preloved! There was a selection.
Click to expand...

Such a shame, your Mum sounds a wonderful owner. Lucky for the dog she did end up taking on though, he's landed on his feet :)

equi said:
Just playing on your emotions. No reputable rescue would offer a nervous dog to a family like yours.
Click to expand...

My thoughts exactly. Just a shame as this dog is such a sweet little chap. Gutted for him that they seem to want to sabotage his chances of finding a loving family.
 
equi said:
Just playing on your emotions. No reputable rescue would offer a nervous dog to a family like yours.
Click to expand...

this-they want you to have the two.

I have totally given up with rescues. I've passed home checks with breed rescue societies who's welfare officers who have highly recommended me-only to be told by their head office that they don't like my fences/working situation/amount of other animals I have. Or I get offered rescues that turn out to be foreign, carrying a disease, or I travel for over an hour to find one 'with no issues' to find out its been returned three times for resource guarding or the very famous rescue centre that could only offer me a dog that was in there for biting kids-when I specifically asked for no big issues or the other rescue that wanted me to take a dog into my home without meeting it first.

We will get another pup early next year.
 
Ive had three rescue dogs, all have come from private homes so to speak (one lady found two dogs and tried to find owners but could not, and she was not from here and going home thus dogs needed a home immediately, second current dog was abandoned in boarding kennels i worked at.)
 
The last dog I got from a proper rescue, a lurcher,I had to wait two weeks, they needed to see my husband even though he worked long hours and had nothing to do with the day to day care. They had to do a home visit, fair enough, I visited every two days but in the mean time it caught mange. What really annoyed me though was no one asked if I had any experience of caring for a potentially traumatised dog or offered any support, and nobody told me that lurchers are virtually untrainable self centred SOBs, but that another story.The first few days the kitchen floor was a sea of poo, because he had picked up a tummy bug in kennels. Fortunately I am used to being up to my elbows in s***. When he eventually died 10 years later, I wanted to take another one, so I phoned all the lurcher rescues. I was given the run around, its like they do not want to rehome them. In the end I could not be bothered and bought one off Preloved, not much money and far less hassle, although I didn't really want a puppy, and he is a virtually untrainable self centred SOB.
The next I rehomed off Facebook privately, a rottieX, a lovely dog, which actually wants to please you and more intelligent than some people. There are a lot of rescues that advertise on FB, the next time perhaps I will try a smaller one.
 
There are good rescues out there just like Caylas Adopt a dog but there is an awful lot out there who are completely unrealistic about rehoming dogs.


I foster for a rescue and I have to say some of the other fosterers dont have a frigging clue, I was approached to foster for another rescue and it sounded great until we got to the part they have between 20-30 dogs that are unrehomeable for one reason or another, to me that smacks of hoarding so will give them a miss.

Dont give up, the smaller rescues are a lot more hands on and really try to match up the right dog to the right home so get searching. Both my Dobes are from a breed rescue who were first class, the lady running it doesnt suffer fools but that is a good thing as the dog and ultimately the breed are paramount.
 
My dad recently got a rescue collie from a tiny local rescue... The lady didn't even do a home visit. On meeting my dad (experienced dog owner, fit but retired etc) she decided on the spot he could have her.. I keep in touch on fb and she loves to hear about her..

Before that he tried a bigger rescue but the lady wasn't helpful at all and eventually stopped communication with him altogether so we gave up..

All he wanted to know was dog used to older children and to travelling in car. Nothing too complex lol

Fiona
 
What a frustrating experience! Some rescue centres really do seem to have a problem letting their dogs go to new homes. I agree with an earlier post that often the smaller rescues are easier to deal with.

In your situation, I think I would try to speak to someone at the rescue centre face to face and explain how you would love to get to know the dog you were originally interested in, but stress it is impossible for you to take on two dogs, and especially a nervous dog. Surely finding one dog a good home is better than not finding one for a pair.
 
It does sound very odd.

Just to balance out the stories, I know several people who have had no problem adopting from rescues, and that includes breed rescues and a large national charity rescue - one of these dogs was rehomed to a woman in her late 70s who could only offer short walks, doesn't drive but has a secure garden and family nearby.

Have to admit hearing this kind of thing about rescues is very offputting. I've also noticed that some rescues seem to describe almost every other dog as one who must be the only dog in the household, which also seems odd.
 
I also had problems with the bigger charities. I couldn't because I would take the dog to work, apparently.
I gave up and bought a pup. Turns out the breeder has a small "rescue" (not a charity, she takes in unwanted Tamaskans) so if I was looking for a friend for Tamriel, I would see if she had any, as she is very happy with the way I keep Tam :)

They really do not help themselves, I found the same with horse charities! We did manage to get a cat from the RSPCA, but turns out she has an illness and will have to have almost all of her teeth removed. We got her at just over a year old and the vet said she would have had this since a tiny kitten and it should have been picked up when they rescued her. Although we love out Chilli cat, we're pretty miffed they adopted out a sick cat without telling us!
 
OP I see you are in Surrey. Have you tried Battersea, you have to fill the forms etc in but I found that if you then follow that with a call and a chat you get somewhere.

Rules are made to be broken, I decided to re home a young mistreated staffie, ideally you take your dogs into the centre to meet the new one. I explained that my country bumpkins wouldn't cope with a city visit.

Eventually after long conversations with the head of welfare who was fostering our potential dog at home we agreed a plan.

Children and I would go and meet the dog, husband didn't have to come as it was clear he was dog friendly as we already had 2 others. My current dogs were well socialised and friendly, new dog was young.

Battersea person agreed to deliver dog, do home check, and complete all paperwork all in one go. We still have Lily staffie in our pack.

A friend had a similar experience with them having been turned down by other rescues because her garden wasn't secure (500 acre farm!)

Battersea seem to be more willing to give things a try and take the dog back if things don't work out whereas many other rescues want to hold out forever looking for the 'perfect' home but often if compromises are made everyone is happy.
 
I have had five rescue dogs over the years and still have two. I was turned down by the Dogs Trust because I was interested in a young lurcher and I was 62. I was also ineligible as I did not intend to have my existing dog neutered. I do not hold it against the organisation and am even a member. I still have three lurchers and two of them are rescues from a smaller rescue. I also successfully fostered rescue lurchers with various problems for several years. Every rescue is different, just like the volunteers who man them. You will find a wide spectrum of 'beliefs' even in the same organisation! Opinions on animals and people is after all very subjective so do not be discouraged, most people are trying to do their best for the dogs and work hard at it.
 
I have had a similar experience with a rescue - tried for several weeks to contact them including going there in person, but was unable to get in touch with anyone.

I see you are in Surrey but if you're willing to travel to Kent there is a fantastic rescue who are great with rehoming their dogs and flexible about garden size/work hours etc if its the right dog. They're called Happy Endings rescue.
 
Thanks for all the replies :) such a shame to hear so many people have had similar issues with rescuing.

The rescue I'm dealing with is a small, local rescue. Having now experienced the way they operate, and looked into them a little, I am inclined to believe they are just hoarders. I'm sure their animals have a lovely life there, just a shame they don't seem bothered about actually finding families for them.

I was in Surrey, but moved to West Sussex earlier this year (must get round to changing my location on my profile).

Unfortunately, we aren't really in a position to get a pup atm, much as we would like to. My children are small (5 years and 2 years) and my son in particular is like a hurricane. He wouldn't mix well with an excitable pup who needs lots of training, I think they would lead each other astray!

A lot of rescues, especially the bigger ones, would probably be reluctant to rehome a dog with an us due to the age of the kids.

We will definitely keep our eyes out for the right dog. Although, I must say, this experience has made me hesitant. Upon meeting us initially, the rescue seemed really enthusiastic and encouraged me to bring the kids to meet the dog. That went really well and my daughter now keeps talking about him and asking to see him again. I don't want to put her in that situation again unless we know it's going to go somewhere.
 
I'd second the idea of getting something off preloaded/Gumtree etc.

I realised after loads of heartache and huge amounts of effort that no 'rescue' near me was going to help their dogs by considering us seriously. The middle aged (childless) witches who run them variously had issues with my marital status/family/location/other pet/etc. And so they put other dogs to sleep rather than rehome any they had. This included large and small organisations although I should stress that I didn't try Battersea as they didn't have anything that looked suitable for me. Others had me fill out pretty detailed multipage forms and then didn't get back to me.

I ended up with something off Gumtree (for less than the adoption fees) who I absolutely trust with kids (although do supervise) and who is very well bonded and happy with me from about the first day!

A lot of rescues are cautious about rehoming with kids so won't consider you for most animals anyway. But even if they do they won't know they history of the dog. And I certainly wouldn't trust any history given to a rescue by someone handing their dog over that was then passed on to you. No-one at a good point in their lives with a good relationship with their dog would be signing it over anyway.

But many breeders won't have tried their animals with kids /will be wanting to make a sale.

If you're looking to bring any dog into your family at the end of the day YOU make the call on your children's safety.

For an adult dog I'd certainly go down the small ads route again. Be prepared to act fast (pick it up the day you reply) and go with eyes open. Ask any questions you need and treat the answers with scepticism, just like you should when going via a charity. Private ads are from less desperate people than those signing over to charities but the dogs still need homes to prevent others being pts. As long as you don't pay silly money you're still arguably doing a good thing.

I'd supervise any toddler/lurcher interaction VERY carefully as even one nip could be very serious. But I'd not think one from a breeder that is still puppyish was necessarily safer. But then I prefer other breeds anyway.
 
ThursdayNext said:
I'd second the idea of getting something off preloaded/Gumtree etc.

I realised after loads of heartache and huge amounts of effort that no 'rescue' near me was going to help their dogs by considering us seriously. The middle aged (childless) witches who run them variously had issues with my marital status/family/location/other pet/etc. And so they put other dogs to sleep rather than rehome any they had. This included large and small organisations although I should stress that I didn't try Battersea as they didn't have anything that looked suitable for me. Others had me fill out pretty detailed multipage forms and then didn't get back to me.

I ended up with something off Gumtree (for less than the adoption fees) who I absolutely trust with kids (although do supervise) and who is very well bonded and happy with me from about the first day!

A lot of rescues are cautious about rehoming with kids so won't consider you for most animals anyway. But even if they do they won't know they history of the dog. And I certainly wouldn't trust any history given to a rescue by someone handing their dog over that was then passed on to you. No-one at a good point in their lives with a good relationship with their dog would be signing it over anyway.

But many breeders won't have tried their animals with kids /will be wanting to make a sale.

If you're looking to bring any dog into your family at the end of the day YOU make the call on your children's safety.

For an adult dog I'd certainly go down the small ads route again. Be prepared to act fast (pick it up the day you reply) and go with eyes open. Ask any questions you need and treat the answers with scepticism, just like you should when going via a charity. Private ads are from less desperate people than those signing over to charities but the dogs still need homes to prevent others being pts. As long as you don't pay silly money you're still arguably doing a good thing.

I'd supervise any toddler/lurcher interaction VERY carefully as even one nip could be very serious. But I'd not think one from a breeder that is still puppyish was necessarily safer. But then I prefer other breeds anyway.
Click to expand...

I agree with this, with the proviso that you acknowledge if the dog is a complete nutter you can PTS it.
 
honetpot said:
nobody told me that lurchers are virtually untrainable self centred SOBs,
Click to expand...

You've got to be joking? My Lurcher is as well trained as any other gundog!! No reason for them to be untrainable at all

(Sorry OP - I couldn't let that comment go unreplied to - I hoep you find your dog soon :) )
 
My lurcher is very good I must say, never steals, walks to heel, is a bit independent I admit. She doesn't recall in full flight, but if you could get in there early enough you stood a fair chance. She is old now and it is no longer an issue.
 
Another vote for the lurchers. All the ones I have owned or fostered have quickly learnt to be clean in the house, not steal or destroy anything, be friendly to visitors and calm for the rest of the day after a good walk. They all walk on a loose lead and have taken readily to various activities, from gun dog training to agility. My dog showed up quite a few pedigree gun dogs with his stays and retrieves during training and my bitch loves agility so much she will go over a see-saw just for the hell of it if she sees one. They are more independent than some other dogs but they are certainly not short of brains and very willing to please.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top