Full loan horse now owner wants to ride

HaffiesRock said:
Owner is being a bit cheeky I think!
Click to expand...

Yep but, OP, as you like the horse it's worth having a chat with her, reminding her that this is not the arrangement you both agreed to.

HaffiesRock said:
You wouldn't rent out your house and expect to stay over at the weekend!
Click to expand...

I did once have a landlord who lived abroad ask me if I'd mind going away on holiday for a couple of weeks in August as she wanted to stay in her house while she was over for a visit!
 
As others have said - you've had all the rubbish over winter with limited riding and now it's sunny she wants to ride again. I'm interested to know if she did this during the winter months? Oh but there's hard work involved in that...
 
You don't need to be harsh about it or mean. I would just say "I don't have a problem with you riding the horse once a month or so but the agreement we have in place is a full loan and if you want to ride twice a week then we have more of a part loan agreement. In which case could we split the cost and horse cae duties"
 
Doesn't have to be confrontational. Just explain that it wasn't the agreement you signed up for. As you understood it by paying everything you had exclusive use. If she wants it to be a aprt-loan over the summer then the costs & work need to be shared. If she wont contribute then terminate it. Other people only treat you as badly as you let them treat you. Be brave, approach it a calm, adult fashion. I appreciate you like the horse, but as harsh as it sounds there are others you will also like out there. Might well be a plan to be an owner & part-loan. At least you will understand the loaners perspective so should be a caring, responsible owner who apperciates their loaner.
 
Sounds like she wants it both ways tbh. Either it's a full loan and she can visit occasionally with you paying for upkeep or she takes back over the upkeep, livery etc and you only pay a small, set amount per week. I'd just explain to her how you feel. As others have said it might just not have occurred to her. I know my brain is completely frazzled, having just finished my last exam for my first year at uni so she could be in the same boat if she's had exams too!
 
I would absolutely refuse to have some friend ride horse, and as to owner, well just tell her that you understood she was giving her horse over to you for 3 years, and if she wants to ride out she needs to fit in with your schedule.
Twice a week, on her terms, and she needs to contribute to costs or end the agreement.
 
Last edited:
Elbie said:
You don't need to be harsh about it or mean. I would just say "I don't have a problem with you riding the horse once a month or so but the agreement we have in place is a full loan and if you want to ride twice a week then we have more of a part loan agreement. In which case could we split the cost and horse cae duties"
Click to expand...

This... if she is wanting to ride weekly... then technically you are SHARING, and she should cough up her part of keep, bills, care of horse etc.

Having considered loaning/sharing my horse, I would never expect any loaner/sharer to pay full costs if I still wanted to ride regularly!
 
Nothing new to add and agree that this is a very cheeky. Just wanted to say good luck and let us know how you get on
 
Elbie said:
You don't need to be harsh about it or mean. I would just say "I don't have a problem with you riding the horse once a month or so but the agreement we have in place is a full loan and if you want to ride twice a week then we have more of a part loan agreement. In which case could we split the cost and horse cae duties"
Click to expand...

Just wanted to add that I couldn't put it better myself!
Good luck!
 
I'd mention it to her for sure. I loaned my horse out before I went to Uni, and we spent the summer before hand partly sharing him (she'd come up once a week and ride with me, just so she got used to him and could decide if he was right for her!) Once she took him to her Equestrian college, I would always ask before I visited him. During the Xmas break she worked full time, so she was quite happy to let me ride through the week for her. As it was, she didn't get along with him and ended up giving him back to me before the long summer break- however we had initially decided to share him again when it came to that anyway.
If nothings been decided between you, then she's in the wrong, so have a word. However, as I can see it from her side, I know how hard it is to leave your horse for uni, and she might take it quite offensively, as I bet she still see's it as 'her horse'. Maybe you could arrange to share? I wouldn't leave it until 2 weeks before she goes back, as someone suggested, as i've experienced first hand the stress of trying to find somewhere for a horse whilst in a separate part of the country! (But if you're looking for a loan/share and you're in Nottingham area, let me know haha).
 
What is in your loan agreement re. owner having access to ride (pleeeesse don't tell me you haven't got a loan agreement in place).

IF the owner decides she "wants to ride" PLUS bring a friend (naughty!) then this should be there.

I'd be inclined to do as someone has suggested, i.e. bring it up gently with the owner and say words to the effect that from now on perhaps a share as opposed to loan agreement between yourselves would be more do-able.

But ultimately it is the owner's horse....... and therefore very little you can do about it unfortunately. I've been in the opposite position - i.e. where I put my horse on loan with the agreement that I could ride him twice a week, then found my access severely restricted to him by the loaner. But if the owner in your case had wanted to ride her horse in the summer, this should have been put in the loan agreement and/or arranged at the outset, it is a little unfair TBH for her to suddenly turn up now when OP thought there was a "full loan" in place for the three years the owner was at uni!!!

So as a loaner who had what they thought was "full" loan for the duration, can see OP why you're upset, I would be too particularly if owner starts "bringing a friend" as well. Owner on her own to ride "her" horse occasionally is one thing, bringing a friend is deffo not. That is NOT fair on you and I think you need to get a loan/share agreement sorted out properly if not already in place, and revise it, if there is one in existence, for all your sakes TBH.

Or else give her the horse back now for the summer, then when the autumn comes and she's stuck with what to do with it and comes back licking your @rse to take it on again you can then just give her a rude gesture and tell her to trot on up the road!!!
 
Last edited:
Hi yes we used the bhs loan agreement. It mentions visits by the owner to check on welfare but does not mention the owner riding at all. I do understand its a terrible wrench to put you beloved horse on loan and I know she sees him as still her horse. Thats why I have accommodated her visits and rides previously but I think asking for twice a week is a lot to ask and she should have made this clear from the outset when we sat down to go through the agreement. To be honest, I wouldnt have gone ahead if I had known this. Coming up to the yard to hear she has been up earlier with friends I find a bit difficult.
 
happydaze said:
Coming up to the yard to hear she has been up earlier with friends I find a bit difficult.
Click to expand...

As you said brave pants needed.

Can i ask where you keep the tack or whether she has spare ? 'Cos if she doesn't have spare the easiest way is to take the tack home. Then if she wants to ride she has to ask and you can then broach the subject rather than having to confront.
 
I would be really annoyed if I were you.

But I am useless at confrontation so can understand your reservations. But you really need to say something sooner or later before it gets to a point where you do fall out. Start by saying the above, that arrangement is more part loan so costs should be split (presuming you're happy doing that for the 6 month duration) and if the situation still isn't resolved then I would give notice.

Full loan means in effect means the horse is yours for the period of the loan, and I think she's very cheeky to expect you to pay and do all the work then ride a few times a week.
 
Lizzie66 said:
As you said brave pants needed.

Can i ask where you keep the tack or whether she has spare ? 'Cos if she doesn't have spare the easiest way is to take the tack home. Then if she wants to ride she has to ask and you can then broach the subject rather than having to confront.
Click to expand...

That sounds a really good idea. You could be taking it home to clean!

It is going to need brave pants but I think you need to say something. She is being unreasonable IMO. It is like Sharing her horse but expecting sharer to pay all the costs.
 
I had a similar experience years ago and so I bought my own, best decision all round.

Good luck, as you get on I hope you can sort the situation amicably
 
Ok - if your not a brave pants person do the following text

"hi x, I don't think the loan agreement is suiting either of us at the moment, I thought I had full loan for 3 years, and you now want to ride x a couple of times a week over the summer. This is not what i understood would happen, so it is with regret I am giving you x notice on the termination of our loan. Really hope you find some one to take x on over the winter as he/she is such a lovely boy.girl"
 
Gingerwitch said:
Ok - if your not a brave pants person do the following text

"hi x, I don't think the loan agreement is suiting either of us at the moment, I thought I had full loan for 3 years, and you now want to ride x a couple of times a week over the summer. This is not what i understood would happen, so it is with regret I am giving you x notice on the termination of our loan. Really hope you find some one to take x on over the winter as he/she is such a lovely boy.girl"
Click to expand...

Perfect!!
 
I had exactly the same thing! Went down to find the horse had been brought in, when the owner saw me she said 'oh were you going to ride?', 'erm not really the point but, yes!', 'Oh I was going to let *** hack her out with me'. I was livid, blood boiling and I just let them go off and hack together. It happened again within a few days and then again. I said I was confused about our 'full loan agreement'.

Sadly a squamous carcinoma popped out of her vulva a week later and guess what...she was definitely on full loan to me when it came to considering who paid the vets bill!

End it and buy your own.
 
Gingerwitch said:
Ok - if your not a brave pants person do the following text

"hi x, I don't think the loan agreement is suiting either of us at the moment, I thought I had full loan for 3 years, and you now want to ride x a couple of times a week over the summer. This is not what i understood would happen, so it is with regret I am giving you x notice on the termination of our loan. Really hope you find some one to take x on over the winter as he/she is such a lovely boy.girl"
Click to expand...

Yes I think this is about right, it's to the point but polite!

I think the owner is being cheeky, but she probably doesn't realise she is taking the pee. Personally I wouldn't mind if an owner wanted to come and ride maybe once a month or less, basically as an occasional one off, but I'd be wanting a share contribution in this case... however you have not decided you wanted a sharer, you have been coerced into it. You could offer to buy the horse from her if you can afford it though :-)
 
Update, all is sorted now to both our satisfaction. I am keeping the horse on and all is fine. Dont really want to say more than that except that she has dealt with things in an exceptionally mature way which only backs up my feeling that it was just that she loves the horse and just hadnt thought things through. I have utmost respect for how she has handled this. Thank you all for your thoughts, its been really helpful.
 
Glad it all worked out - sometimes a quiet chat is all that is needed rather than to go in all guns blazing. Good for you :)
 
happydaze said:
Update, all is sorted now to both our satisfaction. I am keeping the horse on and all is fine. Dont really want to say more than that except that she has dealt with things in an exceptionally mature way which only backs up my feeling that it was just that she loves the horse and just hadnt thought things through. I have utmost respect for how she has handled this. Thank you all for your thoughts, its been really helpful.
Click to expand...

So pleased to read this and glad you have both sorted things and are happy. :)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top