Getting cold feet about my horse.. What should I do ? Is it too late?

And that's ten minutes of my life ill never get back...,, but now I'm in the zone, perhaps mumsnet would be a good idea?
 
I would never ask a sharer to pay for tack I would have walked away then , your lucky she is still interested !
My family and my horses go hand in hand , maybe she wanted moral support when she brought her troop with her .
As someone earlier said how can you not trust her with your tack but with your horse , IMO I think your being unreasonable I certainly wouldn't do that to a sharer and if you terminate this now I sincerely hope you re-imburse the poor girl for the tack she has had to pay out for !
 
Slightly frustrated at the fact that people have jumped to reply with out reading all of OP's responses.
To answer the question asked by OP I do not think its unreasonable for you to want to accompany her on her first hack out. My old share horses owner did this after he had been off work even though I had been sharing him a few months already. You need to insist that you accompany her, make sure you're clear of your reasons why eg he may be fresh seeing as he's had time off
 
Two points. I agree with you to be suspicious about her refusing to hack out with you. Strange.

Second point. I have loaned one of mine out. With tack, rugs etc etc and I travelled him 400 miles at my expense. Agreement has her returning him if he has to. I would never expect her to pay for saddle etc. she has a bridle, if she didn't, I would have found one.

Not sure what else to say.

Some of the posters on here are seriously rude. Get over yourselves.
 
Hmm tricky situation OP :/

I wouldn't be happy with that text response from her...
Tack situation...if you said that she should wait and she didn't then that's her issue.
Hope you manage to sort it one way or another OP :)
 
OP I think you should re-write this thread's original post and make it into a poll! Would be much easier and would have saved a lot of time and repetition!! Suggested answers could be....

A, She shouldn't be allowed to hack alone first time and I'd be wary.
B, She is a saint for getting her own tack and you should be strung up!
C, I haven't read all the posts but just wanted to join in.
D, I just came to argue/join in with the pack.
 
Honey08 said:
OP I think you should re-write this thread's original post and make it into a poll! Would be much easier and would have saved a lot of time and repetition!! Suggested answers could be....

A, She shouldn't be allowed to hack alone first time and I'd be wary.
B, She is a saint for getting her own tack and you should be strung up!
C, I haven't read all the posts but just wanted to join in.
D, I just came to argue/join in with the pack.
Click to expand...

E, I only came here for one of Sammy's cuppas. :D
 
I can see why you're a bit worried because of her reply to the text but it could be because of anything. She could have sent a bit of a blunt text because she was having a bad day or might have misinterpreted it. I definitely think it's fair of you to say that you want to accompany her on her first hack. Although, as you accompanied her when she tried him maybe she doesn't feel the same.

I feel bad for her. She must be keen to have spent so much money and she might seem a bit dodgy because she feels under pressure or like she is being tested by you. I think that can cause some people to be nervous and act strangely. She also could be wanting to try him alone just to see what he's like hacking alone before agreeing to the share if that's how she plans to ride him mostly.

Also she probably took her family because she's excited and like another poster said, for moral support. I've taken my family (fair enough only 1 person at a time) for safety reasons too. The danger of meeting strangers over the internet is drummed into us so if she's turning up to meet a stranger in a secluded field it's fair enough that she doesn't want to go alone.

I think it would be fair to give her a chance, especially after she has had to wait so long and has had to buy so much, it's reasonable to expect a trial period though.
 
I'd be careful of going back on your agreement, even if you have worries.

You have an oral agreement with this girl and she has purchased tack on reliance of that agreement. If you renege on this it's entirely plausible she may come after you to compensate her for this....doesn't matter whether you haven't signed a contract.
 
harryo'brien said:
I'd be careful of going back on your agreement, even if you have worries.

You have an oral agreement with this girl and she has purchased tack on reliance of that agreement. If you renege on this it's entirely plausible she may come after you to compensate her for this....doesn't matter whether you haven't signed a contract.
Click to expand...

The girl was told not to buy tack yet, she went ahead and did it anyway. I'd say that was on her.
 
Ah sorry I missed that bit! Then feel free to renege :p

I personally don't see what the issue is with making her get her own tack and don't understand why people would ask her to 'jog on'. If somebody offered me chance to share a horse for free and all I had to do was get tack for it I'd jump at the opportunity. Even working livery around where I am is at least £300 a month! Some 'shares' are about £300 a month for 2 days a week!
 
I agree with the majority that its a bit odd to expect a sharer to buy their own tack... Esp. If not ridden by yourself.
Id be pleased if a sharer bought family, I love my horses and would like to feel thE the sharer is proud of them too.
As for being fresh on its first hack,maybe you could insist the someone accompanied her, not necessarily you?
 
I haven't read the whole 14 pages of this thread - but I'm with the sharer here.

I reckon she's probably just miffed at waiting around for 2 months to ride then you sounding like you don't trust her on her own (although I understand why you would want to take her out) - what did you write in your message to her? Perhaps your manner prompted her response?

Asking someone to provide their own tack & equipment is a big ask. I have someone riding my horse a few times a week. I'm not asking for any ££ at all. I take my tack home so sorted out a cheap wintec for her to use.

My feeling is your text after 2 months of her hanging around waiting to ride may have been the last straw, and she's probably looking for a new share as we speak! There's loads of people looking for sharers - often for no money.
 
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