Having a bad day :(

[Birker2020]

She seems like she is taking advantage of your inexperience. We all have to learn how to do things, but sometimes the only way we can learn is to be around people who can show us the way. I think moving to a livery yard may just be your saving grace. You will make loads of friends and be able to do horsey things together and when you run into difficulty like we all invariably do at least you will have plenty of people around to help. You can get DIY for around £30 per week, ours cost £44 per week, but we have very good facilities.

 

[lexiedhb]

Get bottom down to livery yard down the road..... and even if you dont end up moving D there, someone will probably be more than willing to come and give you a hand at home with her, ie watching whilst you put on the bridle and making suggestions on how you might do it better......

 

[brighteyes]

Just to make you feel better, WE had a cr@p day on Sunday. Disaster in fact. Never had this particular problem before and now.....

I'm giving them all away

 

[cindydog]

The last few months have been bad for us vet said my horse can be moved to another yard(totaly healthy throughout strangles out break) no one willing to take us on,and I want us out..dont know what to do shes brill horse make you laugh just want into a proper stable yard..

 

[lensmith7]

I dont know about the others, but this is horse ownership to me I'm afraid.

You feel like this because you love her!!

I'm going through the ups and downs with Josie at the mo and her lamness and surgery.

Whatever is happening, they give you something to worry about. The more you care the more you worry.

Chin up hun x x x

 

[Chico Mio]

Chin up, honey! We all have awful days.

I think the idea of looking for a 1:1 instructor is a good idea - also you could consider going to a riding school and having a few lessons and getting used to the tacking up etc with RS ponies who know the ropes and are used to all sorts of people putting their bridles on. I wouldn't even mention you have a horse of your own to start with, or who you are (you're quite famous in the HHO world, you know!

) THe problem is with livery yards is that although good ones are very good you must have seen posts on here about bitchy yards. And of course, if 'jordanross and Daphi' turn up on a yard, the world and his dog will be trying to help you, probably with the best of intentions but possibly with conflicting advice leaving you even more confused.

So, I would go annonymously to a RS, not let on I had a horse of my own, make friends and learn stuff on 'easy' horses and look for an instructor (you can swear to secrecy

) to come to you maybe once a week. Keep Daphi at home and just do stuff with her like ground work and in hand walking, no stress of tacking up etc, until you feel confident enough.

 

[*hic*]

This is my first post on one of your threads I think but I have read a few. Here are my thoughts.

1) Get bottom down to livery yard and make friends

Then decide whether you want to move Daphi down there or get your new friends to help you at your own place.

2) If you are considering putting up field shelters at home for another horse why not also consider using one of the field shelters for livery to an easy going but experienced person who will help you out with Daphi?

3) If the bridle is causing you a problem consider taking the noseband off it. It's one less thing to keep out of the way when persuading piss-taking mare that you ARE in charge! The other thing I find helpful with bossy mares is to not put the reins right down at the base of the neck when you're putting the bridle on but keep them right up just behind where the headpiece is going to go. Then if horse pulls its head away you can use the reins to get it back where you want it.

Oh, and best wishes to you both.

 

[Perfect_Pirouette]

Please go to the livery yard, there is nothing wrong with asking for help- but it sounds like you need it and i really don't see how else your problems are going to be solved- PLEASE go to the livery yard, talk to them, they may even offer to come and help you out for abit if you're not too keen on moving there but at least go and see.
I think you could really enjoy Daphi if you got some proper help and made some other horsey friends!

 

[ruscara]

When I bought my horse (twelve years ago) I had no experience of keeping a horse, just of riding at riding schools and on riding holidays.
So I kept him at the Equestrian Centre I was having lessons at, on full livery, for just over a year. During that time, I spent most of my free time there, watching exactly what they did, helping on the yard, making up feeds - just learning! And at the end of that time, I moved him to another yard on part livery.
But then I felt I had enough knowledge and experience to keep him without doing him harm

Since then, I have done the BHS Horse Owners Certificate, all four parts (and passed the exams, lol) and obviously learnt a lot more about keeping a horse. But even now, I would hate to be on my own without the support of my YM and other livery owners.

If I were you, I would think very carefully about going to a livery yard for a few months at least, until you are confident about taking care of your horse.

 

[muddy_grey]

You obviously need some help. If you don't know any horsey people around then go to the livery yard and meet some. You could also ask if anyone would be willing to hack out with you. I have hacked out with people from all over as they were alone and needed a nanny/tour guide.
Try to find someone experienced to come and tack her up and help you to. Going to a riding school and practicing would be good.
My old mare was bad to bridle, but I was experienced enough to cope with it. After a few months she settled down. I even once came round the corner to find my non horsey OH with the bit in her mouth backwards trying to put the brow band over her ears and she was just stood there with her mouth open looking a bit miffed!
You will enjoy her a lot more if you can find people to help and give you confidence

 

[Annagain]

I'd echo everything everybody has said about livery yards. I really think some company out on hacks and some friends to ask advice would make the world of difference to your confidence (I don't think there's anything wrong with what you're doing but having someone there to affirm this makes a big difference). I always find myself a lot more motivated to go and ride and do things like lessons and competitions if someone is doing it with me.

Go and see as many as you can in your area to see which ones suit you, there are all sorts out there. For example I'm at a yard where the YO doesn't really get involved in things, other than deciding when the boys are goign to move fields, when they have to start coming in overnight and when they can stay out. This suits me as I don't like feeling like I'm being watched, but other people like the support a hands-on YO can give.

Having said that, you may not need a good YO/YM as other liveries can be an excellent source of not just practical help but emotional support when you have days like today or worse (one of my friends at the yard was there when I found my old boy down in his stable with colic in the morning and stayed with me until the vet had been and gone even though it meant missing an important meeting and the YO sorted the hunt to collect him so I didn't have to)

Personally, I prefer a small, adult only yard, but you may like the chaos that kids or a big yard brings! The sort of clients that are there though is something for you to consider.

Facilties are another - with what you do at the moment, you probably don't need somewhere with incredible facilities, just nice stables, safe turnout, and good hacking. A school would be a bonus. I wouldn't think that would be too expensive. I pay £20 a week for that (including a school).

Having said that, if you decide you and to stay put, and you have room for a livery why not offer it at a reduced rate in return for helping you out? That might get you the best of both worlds?

 

[smirnoff_ice07]

It sounds like livery would be a good option for you, especially if there is a yard down the road from you. Some supply you with feed, hay, straw etc, but you would have to find out if they do.
I kept horses at home from the age of 13 until last year when i moved my old pony to the yard with my youngster and tbh I am happier paying the livery, you don't have so much hassle with field management, there is someone to help when you get stuck and apart from that I just like having the company! Also your horse will have more company which might settle her down a bit!

 

[laura_nash]

Is there anywhere nearby you could take her for lessons? Maybe the local livery yard if they have a menage to rent and a visiting instructor. I have my horse at a livery yard and couldn't have survived the first couple of months without all the help from YM and other liveries. However, we also have three people who keep their horses at home locally and come to the yard for lessons. Two of them had practically given up riding their horses before they started coming.

It's not just the lessons, it's also just having a reason to go to a yard regularly because as soon as you start 'knowing people' it really helps. We meet up for hacking and they've gone along with YM / other liveries to shows, fun rides etc, and the horses come here for holiday livery to give their owners some time off occasionally.

 

[flowerlady]

[ QUOTE ]
there is a livery just down the road ( i wasnt sure if it was or not but it is)

I dont even know what to say. its all very alien too me.

I buy my own horse feeds and straw hay etc. does it not work like that then? will they supply it for me or what? ideally for me if they supplied the things i needed that also would cut out alot of my daily chours ( not that im complaining too much about that)

I think it might be worth me going asking and explaining myself to this livery yard down the road. and see what the score is. I dont need to make any decisions today.

I think most of you know. Im not over keen on the idea of a livery yard. probably because i think its a waste of money considering i have a more than ample stable and feild here. but it really is only the experiance im after!


I desperatley need to make some horsey freinds around here. if i did that im sure they,d give me a lift. after all its only advice i need and showing what to do with certain things. it would be cracking then!

that bridle thing does my head in! lol

[/ QUOTE ]

Jordan it would be a good idea I think to go and do your BHS stage 1. When My OH wanted his own horse that's what I told him to do. He did and decided to go on and do the 2 you make lots of friends all at roughley the same ability and if not you soon catch up. Alot of places do them in the evening or on a Saturday if its a college. We both did our stages at Brackenhurst college. It was great, good fun, people of all ages from18 to 50 so give them a ring and find out. You could just to the stable management if you wanted but riding different horses is good for you.

 

[asbo]

get your self off to that livery yard, see if you can have a chat with the YO about stuff