"Having a bond" - what does it mean to you?

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he cuddles me now and whinnies when I walk off the yard at night.

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LOL! Sorry, I confess, it was your post in the other thread that got me thinking about this because I don't believe that affection necessarily means you have a bond.

I think the fact he listened to you at the show or under saddle now (after your initial probs) is a far great example that you've developed a bond.
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Yeah you're right - I think that the cuddles are just added bonuses as he didn't really do that before. TBH, I'd rather he didn't try to kill me than whinnied at me
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I have a bond with her - when I am on her back I trust her completly and know she would never try to harm me.

However hubby has the real bond with her on the ground (typical tarty mare) she will follow him anywhere and grows at least a hand when his car pulls up!!!!!!!

She will not let me pat Murph her next door neighbour though - goes for both of us until I stop
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Having a bond to me means you trust your horse, and your horse trusts you (for example if your horse is iffy about jumping something, if you have a true bond your horse will jump it), very hard to type out what I really mean sorry. Also a horse you trust is a horse that will give you plenty of confidence, I think that I have a true bond with Castle because I trust him, and he gives me confidence and will jumping anything for me out hunting, from 6 bar gates to rather large hedges, he looks after me well
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And if he's lying out in the field and I go sit next to him, he'll put his head in my lap and fall asleep a bit
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Chex is not affectionate in the slightest, he's very much a horsey horse, not a person horse, so its hard to see a bond between us. But, after 9 years together, we definitely have one. I always know what his next step will be, I know him inside out and upside down, and he's the same for me, its like just a look tells him where to go, or what he wants. He's a big woose by himself, but if I ask him to go up to something scary, he'll do it - I can feel him thinking "are you sure? ok I trust you". I almost cried this morning when I went to get him - he was lying down, head up but when I stood beside him and cuddled him he lay flat out, eyes tight shut. I honestly thought he was dying. I kept cuddling him (whilst panicking inside!). Another horse came over and he jumped up in a second, and was perfectly fine! He was just wanting a "deep" sleep, and I think with having me there he felt safe enough to do so. That is the biggest privilage he could ever pay me.
 
Blimey, I've never seen a 12.2hh jump a 6 bar gate before...would love to see a pic if you have one!
 
Sadly I have none as Dad never follows us when we're out hunting, and I am being serious that I have jumped them. The first time I faced one I KNEW he was capable of it, there was also a lot of trust in there too, on that hunt we jumped many of them, but only a few came up on other hunts throughout the rest of the season. He has jumped every single gate we have met out hunting, and I wasn't sh!tting myself because I knew he was capable and I trusted him. That, to me, is a bond
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Ok here i go:

For me, a bond is what i have with Rock. He comes to me for comfort, for joy, he shares all his emotions with me and can read my emotions and reacts accordingly. He has 100% trust in me, and if hes ever unsure he turns to me for encouragement and if i say its ok, he does it. In his time of need, he turns to me and knows that even if to others he isnt visibly different, i can sense that hes feeling down/unwell/happy. He treats me differently to any other person he meets. He finds comfort in me, happiness in me and i in him. He knows me inside out, and i know him inside out. It is that joint bond, that joint trust and that knowledge of eachother.
 
I don't think it is any one thing - I think it is the whole "understanding each other". I have very very strong bonds with some of my horses, particularly the ones I've had since young. My horse, Oscar, the one I am just about to sell to my friend, has an exceptionally strong bond with me, and me with him. He knows me almost as well as I know myself.

Cloud, our pony, obviously has a strong bond with all of us because we have had her for so long.

So apart from those 2 I would say the closest bond I have with any of the others is with Golden. Golden always wants to be with me and I have a very strong attachment to her. It's almost like we read each others minds.

It's not about following you about, all of mine do that, it's something very special that you really have difficulty putting into words.
 
I had such a powerful bond with Cat. He wasn't a demonstrative horse, but when we were together, there was a link that you could almost touch. He would run his chin down my arm or pause to smell my face - considered actions which meant so much because they weren't easily earned from a horse like him. They were gentle, loving gestures which had nothing to do with looking for food. If he neighed to me, it would be so quietly that his nose vibrated but no sound came out - a private greeting just for me.

We knew what each other was thinking, we trusted each other and drew assurance from each other. I'm hoping in time that I'll be able to build something similar with Adrian.
 
hhhhmmm, good question

I have a bond, he tries his best when I ride, a lot of people see him as the normal lazy cob that he is, until they see me ride him ( I get a tune out of him), is confident and trusts me to try new things, calms when I help him through anything scary, fair enough he gets scared but lets me re-assure him and believes me aswell. He looks to me for guidance in a new situation and listens to me and my voice. He lives out very happily with his place in the herd, not top and no way near the bottom, he will always come over to me, by choice even when down the other end of the field. He does not do this for anyone unless it's morning feed time. Today for example, he even trotted down towards me with a whicker. When I am there he shooes away the rest of the heard as if to say, this is my mum not yours, with others he would either wait his turn for fuss or not even bother. He also knows that he can relax with me, especially hacking and enjoy himself, for everyone else he is a safe plod hack, with me he gallops and generally loves being out.

and he gives me confidence by playing me up and dealing with things through experience but does not push it too far. He is the first horse I have felt comfortable to jump whilst hacking, and he knows this. We have grown together in the year I have bought him, he was 14 then, 15 this mayand He is so much happier and has a look of happiness about him, and I am sure he thanks me everytime I see him. His face says it all

Soz - rambling now - I just love him sooooo much !!!
 
I agree with most of you on your views on bonding lol!
I think me and major had a strong bond he always tried his heart out.
He trusted me and I trusted him so much!
He trusted me more than nearly everyone else he never said no to what I asked of him he always tried but I knew his limitations!
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It's sad to think about but in Js final moments he sought solace from me. He called for me and made sure he was as close to me as possible and kept moving his head so he was lying in my lap. That to me shows we had a bond.

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That truly is a very special bond, its made me cry
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I get what your saying. I feel the same way. When I look at my lad I feel so proud I want to cry (how sad am I ?)
My horse was abused before I got him, the fact that he trusts me is the biggest complement I have ever been given.
 
Osk doesn't follow me around, he wouldn't dream of doing so in front of his tough turn-out friends!

I reckon we have a good bond though, considering I haven't had him for long. He respects me, and I respect him. He tries his best for most people under saddle though, to be honest, so it's hard to tell. He does trust me though - I can ride him past scary plastic bags when no-one else can get him to budge, and I trust him. If I were to get on him in nothing but a head-collar, and point him to an open field, I'd trust him to look after me. We also have lovely shared grooming sessions! :P He slobbers on my head while I spend hours making him shine with my gawjus Oster brush that I got at badders... Anyways, we just click! Our personalities are very well matched.

Yes, I think a bond it when your horse trusts you enough to do anything for you.
 
I felt like that just typing it !!!! had a tear in my eye and my heart in my throat.

H was at a riding school and he was sooooo unhappy, bought him to rescue him and he is now in heaven. he had 2 weeks off, no tack onlt headcollar, and then 2 months of happy hacking and now he does RDA during the week but he enjoys it and is so minimal work. as soon as he starts not enjoying it he will stop, at the very first sign. and i think he knows that too. when he sees me he knows it party and fun time !!

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I think it's when they try NOT to stand all over you after they've bucked you off
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LOL!
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Jolly decent of them when they do that!
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I feel like I have had good relationships with all my horses, they all knew me and came to me and followed me around. All of them would do what I asked even when frightened or excited. For me I think its about being a firm and fair leader to them - not letting them down and comforting them when they are unsure.

Spring is probably the most complex horse I have had. She can be terribley clingy with me especially in new places, she glues herself to me and has to be touching me at all times! However as soon as she finds her feet she can become aloof and stroppy and challenges me on a daily basis, she finds new and inventive ways to do this regularly! However we have a mutual respect as I have not let her down, I have always been a strong leader and disciplined her when she steps out of line (not smacking but sending her away and ignoring her - the worst punishment in her eyes!) and always giving her a cuddle when she needs one. She can be very independant and willful and she can also be as soft as muck, she enjoys a good cuddle and fuss from me but its pretty much on her terms. She tries hard for me when under saddle although again on her terms! And has been known to take the mickey out of some very competent riders. So (after all that waffle!) I think we do have a bond and it is getting stronger the more time we have together, like most mares you have to earn her trust and respect and then she will give you hers - I am getting it slowly!
 
I def had a bond with my old boy Murphy that sadly went to horsey heaven last boxing day. I dont think i will ever have that sort of bond again, we went from riding club to advanced level eventing together and i knew him inside out and he new me. i really think that he was my special one and sure i have 2 others but nice as they are they're not Murph. I think when you feel that sense of trust and that you are at one with your horse that is a bond.
RIP Murphy.
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Hmmmm good question.....

Bert knows me, calls to me, charges over to me, is protective in the field of me and lets me do things that he wont let others, is mess with is head and face etc (can be nervy of people around his head) not necessarily a bond.

I trust him 100% even though he has a temper on him and can be a tad over zelous about things but the thing is it is not often I have to ask him to trust me I guess.
We don't compete or jump fences he is challenged by as I am still learning those things. He has learnt to trust me on hacks and very rarely refuses to go forward when something scares him or I ask him to go through water, although he does need the odd reassurance by voice. I guess what I am trying to say is IMO yes we have a bond but I have never really had to put it to the test.
 
mutual trust sums it up very well. I think I've got that bond with Pidge. He always looks up when he hears me but Sunny keeps on eating the grass. He always turns to face whichever way I leave the barn. Lots of other things where he shows his trust in me. But I suppose the biggest one was the other when walking him in hand and we went past a sprinkler and he was like "ooh not keen on this mum" and went to race past it, I only had him in his headcollar and leadrope and just told him it was ok and nothing to stress about and he calmed down straight away. If you'd have watched him then you wouldn't really have noticed anything much, but to me that sums up the bond we now have
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I think its when they try their hardest for me. But also, just those moments when Im grooming them and they put their head in my arms for a 'quiet cuddle'.

I always like it if a horse is lying sleeping in the field and he allows me to go and sit right down beside him and he lies flat out with me right there. I always feel like they really trust me and feel comfortable around me to do that.

All horses show affection differently but I think when you realise how they show it, then you've found that bond.
 
Yes one horse. Had him for a good number of years. He taught me so much and gave me so much pleasure. We trusted each other and looked after each other and it was fantastic.Don't think I will EVER have another one like him.
 
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