Having my boy PTS on Friday – need some advice please

So sorry about your horse.
Read my post "RIP ava" in veterinary where I describe how I planned my mare's last days before putting her to sleep last Wed.
It is a very individual thing. I thought I wouldn't be able to hold Ava as the inj given but as the time approached I found I wanted to hold her and I found comfort in it.

As for your youngster, just see how it goes on the day. If he's calling and distressed to be separated then I would let him investigate the body afterwards. If baby very independant I would turnout with others.
I found comfort in having a plan and even though its only been a few days I feel OK.
You will get through this.
 
a little too emotional to post experience after reading all these posts. Its brought it all flooding back.

But please know my thoughts are with you this week and on friday. Whatever you decide to do, he knows you love him, and you have proven that by making this very hard decision for him.

Hugs
xxxxxxx
 
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To stay or go is a decision I can't help you with but the 'closure' your youngster needs should be allowed. It will break your heart to see him look and hear him call for his friend who he doesn't understand has gone for ever. Once you have witnessed a horse acknowledging the departure of his pair bond you will understand how important it is to allow closure - and how unfair denying it is, too.

Let him see. Please.

My very best wishes for Friday x
 
I just want to offer all vibes and hugs that I can send you. I am in floods of tears reading this knowing I have a very old pony in the field at the moment and some other circumstances xxxx ((((((HUGS))))))
 
I had my lovely young 8yr old horse Teabag PTS about 6 years ago as he had wobblers. I couldn't bear the thought of seeing my beautiful boy collapse in front of me. My trusted YO arranged everything for me and was there to the end. If I didn't have someone like that I would have had to do it but I'm glad I didn't have to.

My last memories are of him wandering away across a field of spring grass in the sunshine.

Do whatever you need to do - don't worry about anyone else or what they think - you will be the one that will be grieving whilst your horse will be at peace. Thinking of you x
 
Really sorry to hear you are having to go through this, huge hugs on making such a tough decision.

When I had my boy PTS I wasn't there, spent the whole morning with him, grooming him and feeding him all his favourite treats but left an hour before the vet arrived as knew I couldn't deal with it and he did pick up on behaviour. Have also found out laterly that the vet actually prefers owners not to be there as they are often so upset that the horse can start to stress and worry.

I was very lucky in as much as had a super YO who took care of everything and cut his tail and took his shoes off for me so I have them.

It is a very individual thing I think, some people want to have the closure and others which I count myself in just can't cope seeing their beloved go down. I have to say I have never regretted my decision not to be there and my last memories are of him enjoying his cuddles rather than anything else.

On a slightly more unpleasant note I would definitely say however not to be there when the disposal lorry comes as I find there is nothing worse than seeing a horse winched on to the lorry, I find it very distressing even when I don't even know the horse and actually just the sight of the lorry makes me feel quite ill.

I hope everything goes as well as it can for you and that you make the decision to do what is right for you and sorry for the last unpleasant paragraph but sometimes feel that it is often overlooked and can cause the most heartache.
 
touchstone said:
I'm so sorry to hear your sad news, but it is the last kindness you can do for your boy to release him from further pain.

To be honest if you think you will get upset then it is probably best that you aren't there, your boy won't know any different and you can give him a big fuss and feed when you bring him in. Another option would be to stay and if you feel you can't stay strong then walk away, but it would be best to have a couple of people, one to help with the horse and one to support you if needed.

I stayed with a friend when she had her horse pts and it was awful as the friend became very upset and this did affect the horse, we had to leave my friend in the stable alone while we saw to the horse which was a horrible way for her to remember her last moments with her horse. Once it was over however she was fine and actually relieved.

You've got to do what is best for you and feels right for you and your horse at the end of the day.

ETA:- Regarding your youngster, they often cope better if they do see the body as it helps them to accept that their companion has gone. Is there another horse your youngster can go out with afterwards?
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Ditto, go with what you feel in your heart, had my boy pts last november, i was a blubbering idiot for the whole day, wasnt there, as i wanted him to die at my dads, so loaded him, which he wouldnt do, so out of character. i wouldnt have coped, i know i wouldnt but still feel guilty for letting him down in his final moments. I was sitting in my barn, 7 miles away, crying my eyes out thinking he was dead, when my old mare, who was coopers friend let out this unreal roar, kinda scared me, but didnt think too much of it. Two days later, I asked dad if the vet was on time, he said no, so as it turned out, the very minute cooper died, cassie let out that unreal roar out of her, and they say horses are stupid!!!!! I beg to differ. As it turns out, they are together again, poor casie was PTS in May. Will be thinking of you, keep the best side out, but dont be afraid to cry!!!!!
 
When i had my lad put down last year due to Laminitis and knowing he loved being out in his field munching grass the vet and YO agreed that i could have him PTS in his field.
We turned him out for half an hour to have a munch on the grass and a final buck and fart...after 3 months of box rest he was glad to get the feeling of grass beneath his feet again!!!
I wanted to be there as i didn't want him to stress about being handled by someone else.
He was PTS by injection. It was very quick and peaceful and my little man went to sleep in his favorite field with grass in his mouth.
I didn't think i would be strong enough but when the time came something inside took over.
We then let his field mate in to see him. He just gave him a sniff and then walked off...I can't say if that helped him or not...He didn't seem that bothered to be honest and they were the best of buddies.
I wasn't there when the hunt came to collect...that just seemed to be a step too far for me.

For everyones experiences and advice at the end of the day the choice is yours. There is no right or wrong answer and only you know how you feel about it.

My friend had her horse PTS last Friday and she had him done at the vets. She wasn't there for any of it. Her last memory of her was of her horse in it's stable eating hay.

Sorry to hear about your horse and I'm sure you will do the right thing for both you and your horse when the time comes. ((hugs))
 
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