HELP! Im a nervous wreck!

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RedVendetta

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Ive had my new horse nearly 3 months. I bought him because my last horse was far too much for me and hes a lot calmer and not as forward. However, he's a real school master, has showjumped to NC and generally an ace allrounder. I took him to his first show a few weeks ago and came 1st, was chuffed to bits. :-) However, yesterday I took him in a XC derby in our outdoor school, (I keep him at a competition venue) and had to wait ages as they were running late with the times. By this point I was a nervous wreck, which really got to my horse.... he started rearing, spinning about, ran backwards into the ambulance (!!) and basically I freaked out. Got in there and fell off at the fifth jumped as he (uncharacteristically) stopped. I then went into the pairs class and got round following another horse, which was great so we ended on a positive note, but I am a nervous wreck at shows, whether the jumps are tiny or huge. I can't cope with it and now it's effecting my new horse and my enjoyment. Does anyone have any tips on relaxation techniques, remedies, anything like that?? Im worried it will ruin my horse!! Thank you xxx
 
I am the same! I loved Rescue Remedy when i was younger, the drops rather then the spray, really chilled me out! i think the best this is practice though! good luck! and dont dwell on what happened recently!
 
Thank you! xx Yes the annoying thing is I had 3 lessons last week!! So I was feeling really confident and then it came to it and I just lost my mind. THink it was all the messing about he did before he went in the ring. Ive learnt a lot from it though, I know now he doesnt like a big build up!! I will try Rescue Remedy for sure! Someone told me to try whisky but Im not sure thats such a good idea when I need to drive home afterwards! xx
 
You are not alone. I'm a nervous wreck at competitions too and it really holds me back. It's the fear of making a fool of myself I think. Maybe I'll try Rescue Remedy as well.
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Me too, total wreck, the best psychology (excuse spelling) I use on myself is to tell myself, ok if its that bad dont go, stay at home, I've never stayed at home yet! nerves are awful especially when everyone else rides around looking Uber confident.
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I'd go with the rescue remedy as well, and also give some to the horse - it really does work and makes them a little less likely to react badly if you do start getting worried, and remember that every one else might look confident but virtually nobody actually is!
 
You just need to go to lots and lots of competitions until you relax

Your horse is reacting to this tight ball of muscle that is sat on his back and you were probably eye balling the jumps, which leads him to conclude there could be something that could eat a horse if you are being so nervy!

Could always go to the doctors and try some drugs, if you don't have asthma beta blockers are pretty fab at taking the edge off!!!
 
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everyone else rides around looking Uber confident.
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That's only because everyone else has had their Rescue Remedy / giant gin & tonic / big nip of Scotch before they go in. I'm planning to be half-cut before my next attempt at doing anything in public with the Moose ! At least then I wont care if i come last again, plus I'll be so relaxed that if I DO fall off, it probably won't hurt.
 
we all get nervous at shows - my only suggestion would be - try and do loads of shows, whether jumping, dressage, xc, in hand showing - the more you do the more relaxed you will be - also read a book called the winning feeling (very dressage based) but great at making you think 'I am a winner' rather than thinking of the negatives!
 
Its worth remembering that you've only had your horse 3 months and you're still getting to know each other. You learned a valuable lesson about him yesterday and now know for the future.
I'm a wreck before competitions, but as I've built a partnership with my horse and got to know his funny little ways (and he's got to know mine) I've found it less debilitating.
 
Another vote for Rescue Remedy, but I usually give it to the horse!!! I take Kalms tablets.... so much so that OH now knows before a competition if I've not taken any and tells me to take some quick smart!!!
 
Thanks for all your replies everyone. Will def be trying rescue remedy and will have a look at the forest products too. Its all in my mind, and definitely was my fault yesterday. I also agree I need to get him out and about as much as possible, he probably had a shock as well! Im going for hypnotherapy to give up smoking so I might ask them about any ideas about competition nerves as well when I go!!
 
prepare prepare and prepare - make list of job to do. Give your self lots of time DON'T NOT RUSH
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- If poss walk course nite before. And walk course as tho you riding it, so say to you self inside flexion here, miss this tree root, take off here etc........ then when you get home and all packed up and sorted. Then sit down quietly and visual riding course and doing 'the perfect round' (where to kick, where to take a pull ect..) and keep that positive thought so when you get to event kept repeating the perfect round so when you ride it you done it so many times in your head, you'll do it perfectly........
 
I walked the course the night before as it was at home.... but i think it was all a bit much. He was wondering who all these people and horses were in his own back yard, why mum was scared out of her wits... at home! I dont trust my horse yet so I need to have more faith in him and trust him to do the jumps, he's very experienced so thats me being stupid! Time will tell... but I have a 2'9 XC next week which Ive done loads of times before with my old pony (who I trusted 100%) so need to do what you say about imagining the course and imagining going clear!! And buy some rescue remedy... now!
 
confidence is a very value thing............ so if you're NOT happy withdrawn and do more training, if not, YOU HAVE GOT TO THINK POSITIVE................ and visualise perfect round and DO NOT FORGET TO KICK!!!!!!!!!!
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pissssssssssssssssssss hip flask i find help me tho
 
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