Help ! Lost cofidence

[adele m]

Hi guys just this year my friend let me have a shot of her horse, the first few times went very well. the third time i rode him everything was going great i decided to go for a trot and it went well until we got to letter a in the school, he bolted into a canter and through me off balance i tried to slow him down with no effect i was scared as i had only cantered once before but this was so uncontrolled, i decided i had no choice to bale out as i tried to turn him in to slow him down. i hit the ground ok just a little soar, i wasn't angry with him so i decided to get back on. my friend helped me on him at the mounting block, i put my foot in the stirrup and as soon as my bum was on the saddle before i could get my foot in the other stirrup he was off he nearly went into a wall and i came off, i hit the concrete at some force my head smashing on the ground, luckily i walked away with only cuts, bruises and a chipped knee bone. he is not a bad horse i don't blame him at all, i was scared as i thought he was hurt, or i done something to mently damage him. he wasn't right for months after. for months its all i could think about in my sleep constant nightmares, my confidence in riding is so low i dont know if i will ever ride properly again, i now dought my riding. thankfully as a result of buying my first horse d she has helped me in so many ways, showing me theres nothing to fear with her, she realy looks after me in the saddle. but my confidence is still not all there.

does anyone have any advice on how to regain my confidence.
thank you

 

[Redders]

It's so pans when that happens! Baby steps. Make sure you trust your horse, and find a good instructor, then try something new every time you ride her or handle her that worries you in a controlled way, taking your time and starting off small, in time you will see that the things that worry you either won't happen, or if they do you are more than capable to ride through them, and it will help build up lots of trust with your horse. I did this myself and my mantra was 'try something everyday that scares me' obviously don't leap in at the deep end but gently push your boundaries and you will get there.

 

[Princess Rosie]

After a very bad fall (fractured my pelvis, vertebrae, bones in my hand) after a friends new horse bolted and I couldn't stop him, I ended up out of the side door after a swift turn! Once I was back on my feet and ready to think about even sitting on a horse I went to a really good riding school, explained my predicament and that I'd been riding for over 30years but was terrified of anything faster than a trot, they put me on a steady neddy, I did a lesson at just walk and trot and then went back for another a week later where she laughed and said "right, you can ride, you are going to canter today and I'm not listening to any grumbles as I won't let anything happen to you blah blah", she got me on the lunge and I cantered holding onto the front of the saddle with reins in one hand and I cried as felt like a massive achievement. I took my hubby back the following week as a treat and we had a lesson together (he's a beginner), he was really encouraging too and she told me I was going to canter on my own and not to worry about anything as the horse won't bolt and if I forget to steer as I get so tense the worst thing she will do is run around to my hubby's horses bum, we cantered and I remembered to steer and breathe and problem solved!!!

I've even cantered my young mare who hasn't done much canter work before I got her and even stayed calm when she threw in some big exuberant excited bucks!

Take absolute baby steps and don't push yourself before you are ready. Remember that what happened to you will probably never happen again as you will never be able to replicate exactly the same circumstances again no matter how hard you try. Don't be afraid of asking for help to get your confidence back, I felt a right ninny cantering on the lunge with one hand on the front of the saddle in front of some kids waiting for their lesson but I felt like I had won the lottery. Best of luck x

 

[Pearlsasinger]

The most important thing is to trust your horse and it sounds as if you do trust yours. Take it steady, extending your comfort zone bit by bit but don't try to take big steps at this stage. Don't frighten yourself by planning what you will be doing this time next year - that can be several steps too far.
And find yourself a good recommended instructor whom you trust to help you.

 

[Love Horse]

Simply thing to me I was riding a friends horse and it spooked and jumped a 1 m fence and I couldn't jump at the time if u can go to a stables and ask if they have any confidence giver horses

 

[Booboos]

I think you need to be reallstic. If you have only cantered once you should be having lessons in a reputable riding school with a good instructor. They will have horses suitable for beginners that will build your confidence and allow you to learn. Riding your friend's horse was a mistake and I am very sorry you had to learn that by falling off twice. Luckily you were not hurt and the horse will be perfectly fine don't worry. However buying your own horse at this stage is another mistake. Apologies if this sounds harsh but it is better for you to rethink things now than get hurt.