help needed please read.

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Goya

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Advice and ideas needed please.
My new dog, Skye, has settled in really well all in all, considering it is only 2 weeks since we rehomed her.
however I am a little concerned that my other 2 dogs just will not play with her nor she with them. They play alongside but not actually with if you can understand my point.
When I throw a ball, Skye now doesn't bother to run after it if the other 2 do. If I keep them on a lead and just let Skye go she will retrieve the ball (or toy) well. (Mind you I still have her on a long line as she is not yet completely trustworthy to come back to me yet)
She also will just "switch off" on occasions. She'll be happily playing fetch etc on her own with us then after only about 3-4 minutes she does not seem interested. It's the same at Flyball training--she will go down the lane and back brilliantly for about 6 runs, then she loses interest.
Any ideas? they will be gratefully recieved.
It seems she is really happy for about 3/4 of the time then she seems to go really quiet and looks unhappy.
 
Some relationships just take a little while to form. Give it time, and I'm sure they'll all be playing together befor you know it.
 
Awww bless her! I guess she is still settling in and trying to find her place in the pecking order with your other two. They obviously have a close bond as they have been together for so long - did she come from a home where she was on her own? I am just guessing but would imagine she just needs for time to settle in and find her mojo!!

Have you tried taking her and just one of the others out to see if they will play together? I just wonder if its a 3 is a crowd thing and she doesn't know yet where she fits. Maybe just take her to flyball on her own one night.

I'm sure she will be one of the girls really soon.
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As I interpreted your post when you got her, it was due to that her family was moving? It didn't sound as if she was a dog that was really starved of attention when you got her and then personally, I would expect that a dog with a sort of happy background might need more time to bond 100% with a new family.

So as the others, I can only say that I think you simply need to give her more time.

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Hi there - this must be very distressing for you, but the other posters are right in that it will take a little time for her to understand, accept and be happy with her place in the new pack. I think that Slinkyunicorn's idea of taking her out with one other dog at a time is quite a good one, providing you can do it without upsetting the dog left behind. Are you on your own or is there someone who could take the single dog out at the same time?

I think the important thing to remember is that the dogs will establish their own order and it is not something that can be imposed ie wherever the other dogs decide she fits in, you have to accept that. I think it is very understandable that she still has some moments where she is a little confused by what is happening - this is no reflection on you, just a normal reaction to what must seem like a very big change in circumstances. Think of what it feels like to go to a new school where you don't know anybody - no matter how nice everyone is and how good the school is, it will take time to settle in. Give her time - what she needs is security and consistency in you treatment of her. Good luck and keep us posted won't you?
 
That switching off thing she does when playing fetch........

JOIN THE CLUB!
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Beau is exactly the same! he will love playing fetch for about 15minutes like a mad man, but then will just stop and be like chase the ball stand over it, look at me like Yup found it, then walks off wihtout it! Not naughty just stupid!

That is why I dont think I could do flyball with Beau! as you say the interest just goes!
I think some collies are ball OBSESSSED others are like YE this is fun, ahh ok im bored now the "funness" has worn off

and on the playing front, beau loves other dogs (like ADORES them!) but his spaniel matys at home, he thinks the world of them, but when out on walks, he would rather let them run and play together and he pretends to herd them (bless!) and if we throw a ball he waits for them to fetch it, and then he herds them back (yes my dog is an ass I am totally aware of this!)

I think maybe, as others said, give her time to see if she adjusts a bit more, as she gets used to your other two she will prob become more and more interactive with them! But the other things I think will either come over a few more weeks, or she will just be a collie that is not ball obsessed enough to bother...... (yes it sucks as often means on walks, you have to walk further as the ball just doesnt cut it!
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hehe)

you never know though, she may end up being an agility wonder dog! (beau seems to be heading that way!
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thank you everyone. I do wonder if she just needs more time. I know that they will establish their pecking order (this seems to be Beau, Jess, Skye at the moment. Beau will always be "top dog" (after me that is) but I feel that jess still has to sort things with Skye. Mind you Jess was a complete stray when we got her so I know she has had her problems. It took nearly 2 years for her to relax and be totally happy.
Slinky-unicorn-- yes we do take her out with just one of the others at times but there is not much difference. we also take her completely on her own sometimes. One of us will take her and one take the other 2.
Finnish-laphund-----I think you also have a good point. From what I know she was loved a lot by her previous owner and it is so sad to see her almost pining. It makes me feel as though we are not loving her enough but we do give each dog lots of individual attention several times each day.
Camilla- you have expressed just how I am feeling-that she is just like a new child at a new school. I am wondering what more I can do to help her.
Lucy_nottingham----i do believe you may be right, she is not a ball obsessed collie--a rare breed!!!. I'm on the waiting list for my agility club.
Mind you when we have been at flyball tournaments she really comes "alive" and is barking and pulling to get into the ring. I also took her to agility class with Beau to watch and she was the same------excited.
Maybe I am jus being impatient but I really want her to be happy. It breaks my heart to see her when she goes into her "withdrawn" state.
At least she is eating well so not off her food at all and she has put on a little weight as she was just a little on the poor side when we got her. I am in the process of changing her on to Skinners as she was on the cheapest of cheap supermarket brand of dried food.
She must like me a little as she is laying on my feet as I type this! Literally!
 
Goya, you're not being impatient, you just want your dog to be happy! It really is early days though- two weeks is not that long. Just keep doing what you're doing - let her find her way and I'm sure it will work out. Will you let us know how she gets on?
 
Thank you. i may be being hard on myself but I'm sure you know what I am feeling.
I'll do updates for you. We are off on a holiday with all the dogs next Friday to a week long tournament then onto another tournament the following weekend. we'll be with several people from our club as we are all camping together and we make a big "garden" for the dogs. there will be about 12 or more dogs together at some times. we also will go for beach walks etc while we are there (we're going to Anglesey)
I am really hoping this may be a big help towards our relationship with Skye.
 
That sounds fantastic - I hope you all have a great time. I have a rescue dog myself who was two when we got her, so I do understand many of your concerns! You obviously care very much about your dogs' well being so I'm sure all will work out. When you get back, put up another post with an update - and good luck!
 
Its not impatience, its caring too much, DAMN YOU STOP YOUR CARING!!!!!
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Nah I think she will come out of her shell more as she settles down with you all!

looking forward to her agility report!
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you are right as always Lucy_Nottingham. I really do care so much. i am always trying to do the very best I can in whatever I do. Sometimes I think it is a "failing" of mine but I'd rather care too much than not enough. (as we all do)
My late Mum used to say I would worry if I have nothing to worry about!!
 
Nothing wrong with caring and wanting your dogs to be happy. I think she is probably still quite unsettled, and sadly maybe pining a bit for her old home. After all people go on holiday and leave their dogs in kennels for 2 weeks and don't expect them to have forgotten them and bonded with the kennel owners in that time
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Sounds to me like you are doing everything right, was she the underdog at her old home and maybe didn't interact much with the other dogs there? I bet the "doggy holiday" will make a real difference to her, apart from anything else your other 2 won't be on home ground so will maybe put them at the same level, if you see what I mean. Good luck with her.

ETS The fact that you say she is laying on your feet makes me think she is still very insecure, so I am sure given a bit of time she will relax and start playing more.
 
That's a very good point you've made Murphysminder about the other two dogs being off their home ground on the holiday - didn't think of that!

BTW - can I join your dandy brush, bran mash and hacking to rallies nostalgia clique?!!!
 
Feel free to join the clique, but its not mine, I think it was started by The Skewbald but I could be wrong. Membership of the clique tends to mean the memory ain't what it was
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Sounds like me to a tee!! I'll try and contact The Skewbald and see if my 1970s rooted memory will get me in...
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Hey-- I want to joint the dandy brush and bran mash and hacking to rallies Nostalgia clique. I must be a fully paid up member having had my first pony in 1966.
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PS thank you all for your advice re Skye. The point about the other dogs not being on home ground is an excellent one.
 
Sounds familiar
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It must have been about 12 months ago I think that there was a thread about such things and someone suggested a clique was formed, we need to show these nesh youngsters how it was done in ye olde days
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This post seems to be diversifying a bit but I know just what you mean. No all weather schools,had to mark a corner of the field for a "school".
I didn't even have a stable as such, just had the use of one at the pub over the road for emergencies or the night before a show or whatever.
I could go on and on.
 
Hey Lucy - dont' cheek your elders!!!

I'm definitely a member of this Crusty Clique. All togther now: "It wasn't like that in my day"
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This old crock has to go now. I'm supposed to be a relief Steward at a dartmoor pony show if my aged limbs will support me and my eyes see enough to drive. LOL
have a good day everyone.
 
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