HELP Seriousy Spooky Mare Bolting - Bad Fall this Morning :( Bye Bye Confidence

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pollypock1211

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Ok i know there are lots of posts regarding spooky horses but it seems everyones horse spooks in different way whether it be napping, spinning, backing up, bolting, jumping out sideways etc & depending on the type of spook there is a different answer. I'm getting confused for the best approach with my horse.

My horse has done all types but USUALLY she will stand still for a few seconds then starts backing up and trying to spin around for home etc. She is completely behind the leg and the more i use it the faster she backs up. The most concerning is that if she does manage to spin she will bolt! so turning her around to back her up past the scary object is not an option.

I have only had her just over 3 months so was hoping this was the biggest issue and that she needed time and to gain trust with me however everyday she has got worse! So far we have not had a ride where something hasn't happened or i haven't had to get off to lead her past something scary. Then the real problem is getting back on, safely! She has had her teeth checked 3 weeks since, her saddle checked over, and physio came last week and all where fine. She also passed 5 stage vetting beginning of October when i bought her. I don't think she is in pain I just think she is truly terrified of nearly everything. Surprisingly she is fab in heavy traffic but will spook at a stick!

This horse is also fantastic in the school! she really is a dream & she listens well (she has competed BD up to novice level). However when something spooks her everything goes to pot! with all due respect to her its almost like she is brain dead and no matter what you do she does not listen. Her head shoots up & the spooky 'thing' is all she sees & pays attention to!

I have really tried to persevere and done lots of research. However after a bad fall this morning and just debating whether to have a trip to A&E i have given up & i am not sure what else i can do. Im at a total loss. This morning was terrible - she bolted with me after a spook and i had absolutely no control (not the first time this has happened but my first fall with her). She hasn't bucked yet while bolting but just stiffens her neck, grabs the bit and goes, out of control. She galloped down the wrong side of the road & i tried turning and bending her neck but she just wouldn't stop. She chucked me as we reached the corner & i watched in horror as she just galloped off in the distance :( on the ROAD.

So the advice i have had so far is to a) change her bit and b) circle her when she spooks. I dont think changing her bit would help as it is a true bolt! and i feel that no bit would stop her during her manic phase! Circling her would seem to add to her tension but apparently it would get her focusing more on me anyone tried this? The conclusion i have come to is that the only solution would be more time and trust. What do the more experienced people think on here? she is a fab mare in every other way it is a shame. Meanwhile i think my confidence has just about had it & at the moment i cant see how i will ever ride her again :( help :(
 
I feel for you - bolting horses are scary when it's a genuine bolt and it feels like a switch has gone in their head and they're running blind :(

OK, a few more questions first, tho...

how old is she?
you mention you've had her 3 months - what did the prior owner do (OK, BD, but any hacking or just school work?).
does she only bolt while hacking or has the same happened in the school?
what's she like to hack in company?
what's she like if you walk her out in hand/ on long lines?
 
I hope you are ok after your fall. Were you on your own? And is she a warmblood? She sounds very similar to my mare, who was bombproof in traffic but would be scaling the rooftops if a leaf turned over. Sadly she injured herself so has gone to be a broodmare. She used to do the spook in the school thing to evade the hard work (she was a quick learner, and a bit good, but would often label things as 'too difficult! Oooo, look, there's an invisible dragon with an AK47 hiding behind that fencepost! That's it, I'm off!'

May not be feasible on the road, but I used to make her stand, talking to her all the while, when she spooked and wouldn't move forward. If she tried to spin, I grabbed the opposite rein with both hands and drove her forward into a halt. And then just stood. Sighing. The expulsion of breath would eventually relax her to the point we could walk forward again - with lots and lots of praise.

I can only suggest loads of hacking with calmer, wiser horses to start with, and also to have a chat with the people at Equifeast. They do an L-Tryptophan based calmer that is magnesium free and I've heard nothing but good things about it. So much so that I tried my TB on it and he has gone from dangerous knob to dope on a rope. Sure, he'll have a hoon on the lunge but he doesn't seem nearly so spooky or out of control. His attention span has increased enormously.

HTH.
 
Kelpie said:
I feel for you - bolting horses are scary when it's a genuine bolt and it feels like a switch has gone in their head and they're running blind :(

OK, a few more questions first, tho...

how old is she?
you mention you've had her 3 months - what did the prior owner do (OK, BD, but any hacking or just school work?).
does she only bolt while hacking or has the same happened in the school?
what's she like to hack in company?
what's she like if you walk her out in hand/ on long lines?
Click to expand...

Thank you. She is 6 years old, Dutch Warmblood.
She has done lots of school work and hacking. She has always been a spooky horse but never to this extreme.
We have had one episode in the school but I couldn't really call it a bolt but, nevertheless, i had no control. My instructor was there so i stayed fairly calm and she finally she came back to the trot but i thought it was never going to end. Nothing spooked her that time she just got a little excited when trotting up the long side of the arena towards the gate!
She is a lot better to hack out in company and would never leave the 'companies' side. However this is hard as she is kept on private yard with our one other semi retired mare.
Never long reined her i wouldnt feel safe to do this. Walking out in hand she is a little better but just shoots her head all over the place trying to find something to spook at. If i keep her head straight shes not so bad and more confident when either me or someone is beside her on foot.
 
I hope you are ok, really frightening when they behave like that.

Have you got anyone to help you with her? I bought a TB a few years ago who I would have given up on unless I had had the help of my partner who is an instructor.
Are you hacking alone or with company? J was a spooky nappy frightened boy, he now events and will hack alone but is a much nicer and happier horse in company so he rarely goes out hacking alone. He can also be a spooky lad in the school, when we first had him it was genuine fright, now he tries to use it as an evasion, lots of inside bend and transitions to keep him thinking near the 'spooky' areas helps alot.

I am a firm believer that Eqifeast has helped him no end. After alot of discussion with Malcolm at Eqifeast he is on the Gold supplement, we notice a big difference if we stop using it. Malcolm is very approachable, a phone call to him may well help.

Good luck and I hope things work out for you
 
Hereshoping said:
I hope you are ok after your fall. Were you on your own? And is she a warmblood? She sounds very similar to my mare, who was bombproof in traffic but would be scaling the rooftops if a leaf turned over. Sadly she injured herself so has gone to be a broodmare. She used to do the spook in the school thing to evade the hard work (she was a quick learner, and a bit good, but would often label things as 'too difficult! Oooo, look, there's an invisible dragon with an AK47 hiding behind that fencepost! That's it, I'm off!'

May not be feasible on the road, but I used to make her stand, talking to her all the while, when she spooked and wouldn't move forward. If she tried to spin, I grabbed the opposite rein with both hands and drove her forward into a halt. And then just stood. Sighing. The expulsion of breath would eventually relax her to the point we could walk forward again - with lots and lots of praise.

I can only suggest loads of hacking with calmer, wiser horses to start with, and also to have a chat with the people at Equifeast. They do an L-Tryptophan based calmer that is magnesium free and I've heard nothing but good things about it. So much so that I tried my TB on it and he has gone from dangerous knob to dope on a rope. Sure, he'll have a hoon on the lunge but he doesn't seem nearly so spooky or out of control. His attention span has increased enormously.

HTH.
Click to expand...

Yes Warmblood :) Dutch but bred in the UK. I have gave her lots a praise and even treats the minute she takes a step forward it is just so frustrating as we almost reach the scary 'thing' and then she takes 20 steps back and we end up even further and further away.

She is on a calmer feed with no cereals/mixes and she is also on a calmer supplement from feedmark which seems to have done nothing :/ Very interesting about the L-Tryptohan based calmer i will defiantly speak to the people at Equifest. She is also a loon on the lunge but is nothing like that to ride. :)
 
pollypock1211 said:
Thank you. She is 6 years old, Dutch Warmblood.
She has done lots of school work and hacking. She has always been a spooky horse but never to this extreme.
We have had one episode in the school but I couldn't really call it a bolt but, nevertheless, i had no control. My instructor was there so i stayed fairly calm and she finally she came back to the trot but i thought it was never going to end. Nothing spooked her that time she just got a little excited when trotting up the long side of the arena towards the gate!
She is a lot better to hack out in company and would never leave the 'companies' side. However this is hard as she is kept on private yard with our one other semi retired mare.
Never long reined her i wouldnt feel safe to do this. Walking out in hand she is a little better but just shoots her head all over the place trying to find something to spook at. If i keep her head straight shes not so bad and more confident when either me or someone is beside her on foot.
Click to expand...

What does your instructor recommend?

As an instructor myself, I would most definitely suggest that you put a stronger bit in her mouth as she sounds like she is not respecting the one you are currently using.

I would also recommend that you do not hack her out again until you can ALWAYS (and I do mean always) control her in the school. If she doesn't respect you at all times in the school, there is always the danger that she will take off again on a hack.

On a positive note, I am fairly certain that you will be able to overcome this temporary setback through clear, consistent basic schooling.

Good luck.
 
Scrumdoddy said:
What does your instructor recommend?

As an instructor myself, I would most definitely suggest that you put a stronger bit in her mouth as she sounds like she is not respecting the one you are currently using.

I would also recommend that you do not hack her out again until you can ALWAYS (and I do mean always) control her in the school. If she doesn't respect you at all times in the school, there is always the danger that she will take off again on a hack.

On a positive note, I am fairly certain that you will be able to overcome this temporary setback through clear, consistent basic schooling.

Good luck.
Click to expand...

Thanks - my instructor recommends NOT to change her bit. She is not strong in the school or out hacking expect when she spooks. She thinks changing her bit could have worse effects i.e rearing problems. She is currently in a full cheek french link snaffle.

To be honest i cant see how i am ever going to dare get back on her now - we could have caused such a serious accident and i cant believe i have come out of it with just cuts and bruises (bad!)
 
again I feel for you - I am on a private yard also......

OK, in no particular order, here are a few things that have worked for me, which you might like to try:

Getting a helper to walk out with you while hacking (so OK not a horse buddy, but at least a foot buddy - ideally someone your horse already knows and likes). Having a helper ride beside you on a push-bike can also work but of course you may first need to get the horse used to the push-bike.

More walking out in hand and absolutely insist that the horse's attention is on you at all times...... so (assuming you are not always on the road), you could ask for shoulder-in, in hand/ transitions from to halt or maybe even a little trot/ back-up/ leg yield, etc, etc. Of course you may need to work on teaching the horse this in-hand in the school first, so the horse knows what you are asking for..... it can be done either in a halter or with an in-hand bridle, depending on your preference.

While riding, again always absolutely insist tht the horse's attention is on you (as above) plus always keep a slight bend in the horse, in particular his neck (and of course alternate which way the horse is bent)..... so in that first moment the horse is about to bolt off with you, you can catch the horse by bending him round in that direction, either to a circle, or perhaps even a full-on one-rein stop, depending on how fast the horse is already going (if you one rein stop and the horse is going too fast, he could fall). The bend in the neck at all times means its harder for the horse to then use his neck against you to avoid circling as a means of stopping.

despooking work in the school (over tarps, flappy things, etc, etc...... so the horse learns to be braver and also learns to trust in you some more).

If the horse does stop and look at something, see that as a good thing (i.e. don't punish it and immediately ask the horse to go on).... stopping/ looking/ assessing is fine, so long as they then calmly go past the scary thing. If the horse feel like he's about to spin on you, if needs be allow him a few steps backward but absolutely don't let him spin as the spin is normally the start of the bolt. To stop the spin, focus on using one rein (away from the direction he is likely to spin), rather than hanging on to both (but be quick to notice if the horse is about to spin the direction you don't expect!!). Then once scary thing is at a distance the horse can tolerate, stop, both of you breath, if needs be get off and lead him past rather than fight your way through - getting off and leading is not a sin.

If you ever use clicker/ treat training, this can be a really brilliant distraction, plus motivator for the horse himself to feel brave. I've used this to good effect, for example of a young horse scared to go past a random object out on a bridlepath. To start with, a step toward the scary thing gets a treat, then a few more steps, treat, etc, etc. You'll be amazed how quickly this can change the horse's mindset, so that he sees a scary thing then offers steps towards it. The horse has to know clicker/ treat training beforehand, though - this can be worked toward in your de-spooking work in the school, if you choose to use it.

I hope some of that may help. Above all else, though, be mindful of working within your own comfort zone, particularly if you've lost some confidence. It's perfectly OK to take a few steps back and do some "easier" things with your horse for a while, to give yourself time to build back up. Its your horse and your hobby and you're perfectly entitled to take things at a pace that is OK for you.

Best of luck.
 
alwaysbroke said:
I hope you are ok, really frightening when they behave like that.

Have you got anyone to help you with her? I bought a TB a few years ago who I would have given up on unless I had had the help of my partner who is an instructor.
Are you hacking alone or with company? J was a spooky nappy frightened boy, he now events and will hack alone but is a much nicer and happier horse in company so he rarely goes out hacking alone. He can also be a spooky lad in the school, when we first had him it was genuine fright, now he tries to use it as an evasion, lots of inside bend and transitions to keep him thinking near the 'spooky' areas helps alot.

I am a firm believer that Eqifeast has helped him no end. After alot of discussion with Malcolm at Eqifeast he is on the Gold supplement, we notice a big difference if we stop using it. Malcolm is very approachable, a phone call to him may well help.

Good luck and I hope things work out for you
Click to expand...

I was alone and usually hack out alone as we are on a private yard. She is with one other elderly horse which i think is causing problems in itself as they are so attached. I have lessons with an instructor at a yard a fair bit away from us. I will defiantly give Malcolm a call. Do you have a number for him please?
 
crossed posts with some of the above.... looks like you may already doing some treat training but perhaps you could get that going better in the school, so the horse is more confident in it before using it out?

Agree with you, stronger bits are not always the answer - you could just scare the horse more.

As for your own confidence - is there another horse you could ride for a bit, to get your confidence back up? Also, there is a lot you could do on the ground to work on your relationship with your horse - and your confidence - which could stand you both in very good stead before you even need to think about getting back on again.
 
Dante used to be a bit like this. We'd be going along, not exactly ploddy but he'd be noseying at stuff and going in the right direction with some level of concentration, then he'd just flip out, spin, and ****** off. Sometimes he'd go backwards, sometimes he'd rear first. If we got near anything solid (hedges, trees especially!) he would ram me into them, and if I tried to use my leg he'd go against it and I'd have to get off. Hacking with other horses was no good as he could wind up the calmest saint there was. He got me off on the roads once when he dived up the embankment into a wooded bit and I hit my head on a low branch, thankfully he then got stuck so I could catch him.
He also did it in the arena though, started with taking off when a horse left the arena, built up to being completely random. Otherwise, he isn't a very spooky horse.

I tried a pelham with two reins, didn't work, and a snaffle with draw reins, better but not ideal. In the arena I used one rein stops as he wasn't as bad, and used to make him spin. Eventually one day I just kicked on until he was exhausted & then made him do 10mins schooling, but I pretty much stopped hacking.

We moved yards, and he rarely took off in the arena, and if he did, he came back quickly, but I still hated hacking him although he was marginally better. At the next yard, he was ok for a time, and then started napping, which he's never really done. Eventually we started using a clicker, and my boyfriend would give him a treat when I clicked (when he was calm, or when he'd passed something). Bit of imprvement.
Then we moved to Shrops, and we had the whole summer to try stuff. Generally, Dan is much better to hack with someone walking but no other horses, and I hack him in his plain snaffle now. I only tend to hack on sunday evenings when the roads are quiet though :o Dan is usually fine with traffic, but not tractors or lorries, which is why we hack on sundays - usually less of them! He is slowly improving, and I think by not pushing him into particularly worrying situations he's building confidence, so I only hack when I feel up to it too. Sometimes I just ride up the road and back, and that's enough, sometimes we're a bit more adventurous! It definitely helps us to work within our comfort zone mostly though.
 
Kelpie said:
crossed posts with some of the above.... looks like you may already doing some treat training but perhaps you could get that going better in the school, so the horse is more confident in it before using it out?

Agree with you, stronger bits are not always the answer - you could just scare the horse more.

As for your own confidence - is there another horse you could ride for a bit, to get your confidence back up? Also, there is a lot you could do on the ground to work on your relationship with your horse - and your confidence - which could stand you both in very good stead before you even need to think about getting back on again.
Click to expand...

Thanks Kelpie great advice that i will follow. I did do a little research with the clicker and wondered if this would help with our relationship and confidence on the ground as well as a positive measure for the spookiness so i am defiantly going to give this a try. My instructor has also advised that we have a break during the winter and then come back to her when the weather gets a little warmer. They all seem so highly strung in the winter months!
 
I hate being blunt but with your lack of confidence you are probably not helping the situation.If you want to sort her out I would send her away straight to somebody to try and sort this otherwise things will only get worse.Horses that bolt invariably have a reason and you need to get to the bottom of it fast or you are wasting your time and hers.To me you riding her and expecting her to bolt will only make it worse .It is not a nice experience for you but chances are she has done it before you had her, was she bought privately or from a dealer? was she vetted and blood sample retained?When she backs up is she steady on her feet?Was she cheap?
I think if you have no confidence in her you need professional help from somebody and possibly not your instructor judging by the advice they have given you about giving her time off.
 
From what you say she does not sound like the right horse for you.

Is your instructor able to hop on and assess her on a hack? It may be that she needs a more forward thinking rider who keeps her focused and in front of the leg. I don't mean this as a criticism of you, just that not all horses suit all riders and if she goes well for your instructor you have two options: a) get your instructor to hack her out frequently and until she learns to be more confidence (after all a 6 year old is quite young and this is a period where a lot of them test the waters) or b) sell her to a more suitable home.
 
This sounds exactly like mine! I mean exactly. Only I've had mine for four years so we're a bit further down the road than you. I've been reading all the replies with interest and am going to try the clicker training.

I would agree about not having a stronger bit, mine started half rearing in a gag. I got burned by professional help, as it appears that mine does a full-out bolt with other people (with me she sets her neck and trots or canters home, I like to think she's looking after me, but it's probably because she knows she's got the better of me even at trot :o). But if you are not confident, you need to get professional help.

I also can't reverse past things as if she gets her head towards home, she's off. I have done a few one rein-stops the last few times when quick enough and that has really helped. Mine is a hundred times better on a calmer though, although mine does need magnesium. Her behaviour is much worse around her seasons, so I also keep an eye on those and I try never to hack her out when I am feeling tired or stressed as she'll sense it. She also needs to go out regularly with other horses or someone on foot or in hand as this helps keep her confidence up. She's absolutely perfect once there are two other horses at least - you could put your granny on her.
 
Your horse is very similar to my daughter's mare. She wouldn't hack on own when we got her 3 years ago and would back up at an alarming speed it rear and spin with ny daughter. We started off hacking behind ny mare and then she would take lead. Pony is fab in traffic but spooks at silly stuff. I also started taking her out on her own after she had settled into new home - it did take ages for her to settle. I also did work on the ground with Richard Maxwell halter. She is now 99% brilliant to hack on her own with me although she does try it in with daughter still with spoiling. I just laugh when she spooks whereas daughter shrieks at her. Staying calm def helps. We tried equifeast calmer but didn't make much difference. I find she reacts to clover and anything with mollasses so she has fast fibre and h/ f cubes. I have also started her on pink powder and this seems to be making her more chilled.
 
Crikey, sounds terrifying for all concerned. I really think that getting a professional who works with lots of young/ difficult horses involved ASAP is important. What if she causes a road accident? Make sure they've got top notch insurance.
Hopefully they will be able to work it out but and help you to cope with her. Would you keep her if you couldn't hack out?
 
Kelpie said:
again I feel for you - I am on a private yard also......

OK, in no particular order, here are a few things that have worked for me, which you might like to try:

Getting a helper to walk out with you while hacking (so OK not a horse buddy, but at least a foot buddy - ideally someone your horse already knows and likes). Having a helper ride beside you on a push-bike can also work but of course you may first need to get the horse used to the push-bike.

More walking out in hand and absolutely insist that the horse's attention is on you at all times...... so (assuming you are not always on the road), you could ask for shoulder-in, in hand/ transitions from to halt or maybe even a little trot/ back-up/ leg yield, etc, etc. Of course you may need to work on teaching the horse this in-hand in the school first, so the horse knows what you are asking for..... it can be done either in a halter or with an in-hand bridle, depending on your preference.

While riding, again always absolutely insist tht the horse's attention is on you (as above) plus always keep a slight bend in the horse, in particular his neck (and of course alternate which way the horse is bent)..... so in that first moment the horse is about to bolt off with you, you can catch the horse by bending him round in that direction, either to a circle, or perhaps even a full-on one-rein stop, depending on how fast the horse is already going (if you one rein stop and the horse is going too fast, he could fall). The bend in the neck at all times means its harder for the horse to then use his neck against you to avoid circling as a means of stopping.

despooking work in the school (over tarps, flappy things, etc, etc...... so the horse learns to be braver and also learns to trust in you some more).

If the horse does stop and look at something, see that as a good thing (i.e. don't punish it and immediately ask the horse to go on).... stopping/ looking/ assessing is fine, so long as they then calmly go past the scary thing. If the horse feel like he's about to spin on you, if needs be allow him a few steps backward but absolutely don't let him spin as the spin is normally the start of the bolt. To stop the spin, focus on using one rein (away from the direction he is likely to spin), rather than hanging on to both (but be quick to notice if the horse is about to spin the direction you don't expect!!). Then once scary thing is at a distance the horse can tolerate, stop, both of you breath, if needs be get off and lead him past rather than fight your way through - getting off and leading is not a sin.

If you ever use clicker/ treat training, this can be a really brilliant distraction, plus motivator for the horse himself to feel brave. I've used this to good effect, for example of a young horse scared to go past a random object out on a bridlepath. To start with, a step toward the scary thing gets a treat, then a few more steps, treat, etc, etc. You'll be amazed how quickly this can change the horse's mindset, so that he sees a scary thing then offers steps towards it. The horse has to know clicker/ treat training beforehand, though - this can be worked toward in your de-spooking work in the school, if you choose to use it.

I hope some of that may help. Above all else, though, be mindful of working within your own comfort zone, particularly if you've lost some confidence. It's perfectly OK to take a few steps back and do some "easier" things with your horse for a while, to give yourself time to build back up. Its your horse and your hobby and you're perfectly entitled to take things at a pace that is OK for you.

Best of luck.
Click to expand...



Totally agree with the above advise, the key is building confidence in both of you.
Spent many hours tramping around the fields and following husbands bike last year. It worked and though he can still attemp to nap we hack out on our own happily now. Its hard work but you can get there.
Also make sure you safetywear a body protector and have a neck strap, will help your confidence and increase safety.
 
Its really really frightening when they bolt properly so I completely sympathize with you. I have a Belgian warmblood that I had a very nasty fall off last year when he bolted. Mine is the same in that he's very good out hacking in traffic and with others but on his own he can be quite difficult.
The only thing I can suggest apart from putting her on a calmer of some sort and trying a little bit of sedation out hacking is to take her to a cross country course or somewhere enclosed where you can just hack around then if she goes - let her. I know it goes against everything you feel at the time but you just have to relax and got with it as much as possible. This may help her to realise that there's nothing to gain from running away. I know this worked with mine as a 6yo when he was very very difficult. I also 100% agree with whoever it was above that has said if you can stop her spinning you've won half the battle. With mine, when I'm hacking alone now, the minute he starts to come 'up' underneath me and tense and feel like he's going to go, we stop and calmly turn round and rein back past whatever it is. It seems to be a little piece of reverse psychology that works with mine and his slightly small foreign brain! Failing that - if he wont go backwards he has to stand. And I absolutely INSIST on this. He does not move. And we will stand there like that until we're both blue in the face if needs be! It once took 20 mins of standing at about 19hh and snorting but then he just took a deep breath and relaxed. He got a pat and we continued on our way! Good luck, it is really scary when they go properly x
 
popsdosh said:
I hate being blunt but with your lack of confidence you are probably not helping the situation.If you want to sort her out I would send her away straight to somebody to try and sort this otherwise things will only get worse.Horses that bolt invariably have a reason and you need to get to the bottom of it fast or you are wasting your time and hers.To me you riding her and expecting her to bolt will only make it worse .It is not a nice experience for you but chances are she has done it before you had her, was she bought privately or from a dealer? was she vetted and blood sample retained?When she backs up is she steady on her feet?Was she cheap?
I think if you have no confidence in her you need professional help from somebody and possibly not your instructor judging by the advice they have given you about giving her time off.
Click to expand...

I totally agree with this, if anyone admits they have lost their confidence with a horse the worst thing they can do (for that horse) is try and get it back on that particular horse.
 
just a little point on whether OP should send the horse off elsewhere/ whether she should ride the horse again, etc..... while yes if you have lost confidence on a horse altogether, there's no sense forcing yourself back on (and in fact to do so could be detrimental to you and the horse) - but equally, lets not be too quick to tell OP never get back on again - it may be that the loss of confidence is temporary and fixable, only OP will know that, and that is for her to judge (hopefully with the help of a good instructor), and not for us to judge. If OP does want to rebuild her confidence, and work with someone to solve the problems with her horse, there may well be ways to do this - though equally if the decision is sell/ send the horse for training, etc, that is fair enough too. All I'd say is for OP not to rush into decisions after a particularly bad day.... take stock and reconsider with a little time....
 
Kelpie said:
just a little point on whether OP should send the horse off elsewhere/ whether she should ride the horse again, etc..... while yes if you have lost confidence on a horse altogether, there's no sense forcing yourself back on (and in fact to do so could be detrimental to you and the horse) - but equally, lets not be too quick to tell OP never get back on again - it may be that the loss of confidence is temporary and fixable, only OP will know that, and that is for her to judge (hopefully with the help of a good instructor), and not for us to judge. If OP does want to rebuild her confidence, and work with someone to solve the problems with her horse, there may well be ways to do this - though equally if the decision is sell/ send the horse for training, etc, that is fair enough too. All I'd say is for OP not to rush into decisions after a particularly bad day.... take stock and reconsider with a little time....
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I am not saying never get back on again, but right now the horse needs confidence, consistency and leadership, which it will not get from somebody whose own confidence is at rock bottom. If more people admitted they shouldn't force the issue there would be lots less messed up horses around.
 
What about a market harborough or possibly draw reins just so she can't get her head up and prevents her getting her neck set. Though only after practice in the school so you know she is happy in it.
 
While I agree, today might not be the day to make a long term decision, the OP has just dodged quite a large bullet. ;) Not acknowledging that, or somehow pretending it won't happen again soon, is likely to end in tears.

I'm going to add my voice to popdosh, Booboos etc. Get someone experienced to look at the situation and advise on what they see, feel, and know. Internet advice can be useful but in cases like this your margins are very small and while you might be get a few chances to try out different ideas, you might also not be as lucky the next time as you were today.

In the original post you say yourself that part of the problem is you don't know WHY she is reacting the way she is and this, frankly, is why no one on the internet can properly advise you. She might very well lack confidence and be naturally reactive - her age, breeding and current situation would all go to that. BUT - and it's a big one - we can't see her so we can't tell! It's easy to get a few pieces of information and make assumptions. Not saying it's anything to do with your case but I've now met an increasing number of horses with similar reactions who are in pain in ways that aren't obvious but can cause severe reactions. Neck injuries are a particular question mark and would not be flagged on a vetting unless there was something obvious and fairly advanced. Horses can have visions issues. Sore feet can make horses very reactive on the road. (I rode one horse who was considered nappy just for the sake of it. Turned out he was bilaterally lame in front and reacted to the fact that the only route off the yard was steeply downhill on tarmac. Horses aren't stupid.)

Riding can be an issue. I've known a few horses that hacked very well on a loose rein, but could not cope with the rider restricting the neck (various possible causes). Others are better hacked "on the hand", even quite strongly so at times. We can't see you, we can't see her so we can't tell.

Sorry, I know I'm not being helpful! But I don't think it's as simple as just building confidence when you've already had some very close calls. She might very well need - and only need - training and a confident ride, but even if that is the case, it sounds like you both need someone else's help to get there SAFELY.

(I know lots of people take risks and they work out. That's part of riding! But taking serious risks on a public road, where other people will likely be affected, is, as you recognise yourself, playing with fire.)
 
Baggybreeches said:
I am not saying never get back on again, but right now the horse needs confidence, consistency and leadership, which it will not get from somebody whose own confidence is at rock bottom. If more people admitted they shouldn't force the issue there would be lots less messed up horses around.
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This is worth rereading. It's all very well to want to do it all yourself but you do have to remember there is another living being involved, one that might pay a very high cost if it all goes really wrong. I don't expect to be able to fix everything that goes wrong with my car just because I can do basic maintenance.
 
Baggybreeches said:
I am not saying never get back on again, but right now the horse needs confidence, consistency and leadership, which it will not get from somebody whose own confidence is at rock bottom. If more people admitted they shouldn't force the issue there would be lots less messed up horses around.
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on this, I agree.... sorry, its just from what you first said I thought you were suggesting don't get back on full stop (also just to clarify, my post wasn't aimed just at you, there were a few people saying don't get back on at all, it seems, but I'm just cautious that there are lots of variables we don't know about so I'd just hate to see someone whose confidence is low feel pushed into giving up when they may be able to overcome the problem, particularly with the right help on the ground). I realise confidence & safety, etc, are a tricky area, though, to say the least.
 
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