HELP -= whats wrong with my advert ?

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Lizzie66

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http://www.horsemart.co.uk/advert/14_yrs_14_2_hh_coloured_other_shropshire/91542

We are trying to sell my daughters pony and have only had two calls.

He is forward in his paces but not sharp and is an absolute angel in the heaviest of traffic, and comes running when called when you want to catch him.

Of the two calls, one has been to see him and the other said they would talk to their daughter and might call back to come and see him this weekend.

The parents of the girl who came to see him loved him, but the daughter lacked confidence and found his paces a little too forward (she currently has a very very steady cob).

I have been honest with callers about him, although his passport has him at 148cm (14'2) I think he would measure a little bigger and might not be suitable for height restricted classes. When hunting he does tend to be strong for the first hour but settles after that. Also when hunting he is best travelled with company, all other travelling he is ok on his own. He can sometimes be stubborn to load leaving home, nothing major, someone either side and he goes straight on. He has never been a problem loading coming home.

I don't think he is massively overpriced, as safe ponies/horses with no major quirks aren't that easy to find. I have seen some priced higher with less to offer.

So why no calls ?

Thanks in advance for constructive feedback.
 
If I was going to be picky I would say great jumping pictures but the flatwork one isn't a great angle. Could you show him being ridden without a martingale?
 
I think the advert sounds good, though can he be safe and also strong? I think, maybe your verbal reference to him being strong is worrying as it sounds like he'd tank off?

It's difficult to sell horses at the mo as it's an expensive hobby, though
I think he's slightly underpriced actually
 
You're right it isn't, we seem to have lost all our decent flatwork photos.

He did do area PC dressage the summer before last with my daughter, she managed to forget the course, and as she isn't keen on dressage didn't even attempt to try for the teams this year !
 
I haven't mentioned being strong in the advert!

I have mentioned it in the thread on here in relation to hunting, and then only for about the first hour, after that he settles down to being fairly steady. If hunting is important to anyone who calls then I would tell them as he wouldn't be an ideal hunting pony for a novice.

On funrides and hacking is perfectly safe and easily stopped.
 
Meant to be constructive:
That's why I said you're "verbal" reference - I know it's not in the written advert, if I phoned and you said he was strong in any activity, it would put me off, that's all, others it wouldn't.

Maybe add a little more about his personality/quirks in the written advert, as you focus very much on his achievements only?
 
I would change the 1st picture, to the 4th picture, in the fast one, he looks very lightweight, the 4th picture he shows himself as a middleweight, can you get a good confirmation picture and a couple of nice flatworks pictures.

Also you need to pad out the written description far more, you tend to read it as short and sweet and wonder what you arent saying, say all activities he has done, hacks alone etc etc.

He is a nice sort and certainly not overpriced, the ad just isnt eyecatching enough out of all of them on there at the moment.

Good luck.
 
Sorry did I sound snotty ? Didn't mean to. I am grateful to get the feedback - honest !

I never know whether to go into personality stuff etc on the advert, as I've read people on here criticising the "fluffy" ad stuff.

Another reason is I can't seem to locate the "manage ad" bit on horsemart !
 
I think the Ad sounds great - the pony should be highly sought after by confident pony club types - I would also say that he looks cheap.

Horses are selling at the mo' if they are genuine and do what they say on the tin. I have just helped my friend buy a horse - after screening lots of ads, we picked two out to see and either would have been emminently suitable, both in the 4 - 5K bracket. The one she picked passed her 5* vetting with flying colours and will be picked up saturday.

I would bump the price up to 3K and just sit tight.

Maybe change Tigger's category from 'coloured others' to Pony Club ponies too - might help.
 
Just to say, I don't like fluffy ad's either - the one that sold my frend's new horse was to the point - when she e-mailed the owner for more details, she was very straightforward and you felt like you were getting the complete truth about the horse, not some rambling story :)
 
Have you tried advertising on Coloured Contacts?
I would have thought a minimally marked Tobiano would get snapped up on there for more then your asking for too, especially as he looks like a mini Stanhopes Diddicoy.
I agree the 4th picture shows him off well and the flatwork one could be better, maybe being more specific about his achievements and how he is to handle from the ground, box, shoe,catch etc etc. I hate "fluffy" ads too.
Is he CHAPS registered?
What about advertising on PCUK I reckon youd get alot of interest from there, if I could lose half my bodyweight and about a foot off my height id snap him up i think hes gorgeous.
 
Have you tried the pony club website?
When my friend advertised her pony a few weeks ago, she had no calls from horsequest or horsemart and lots from the PC website.

In the advert, I would mention how he has brought your daughter on, reason for sale and say how he is now looking for a new home to teach another child. I would emphasise that he is a pony club pony. And the 'confident rider' bit might put people off.
 
I put confident novice because he does have big paces so might well be off putting to an absolute beginner. Other than that he doesn't have any vices, isn't sharp or spooky and would be great for a teenager or small adult.

From the reaction the girl who tried him had I think the statement is absolutely right, as he was good but just a little too forward for her.

But I know what you mean putting anything slightly off putting in an advert is probably not not the best of ideas
 
I don't think you are doing anything wrong - here is a link to the post I did last week about my pony - he's in Horse and Hound this week and the online ad has been active since Tuesday and I've had no calls! He's been on Horsemart for 2 weeks and has had 3 calls, despite over 1000 views!

http://www.horseandhound.co.uk/forums/showthread.php?t=357268


I really think it is the market at the moment. It's not just ponies that aren't selling - my friend is selling her TB and has had no calls and my trainer is selling her 15.2 dressage cob and had had no calls.

Good luck with your pony - I think he's great and the price is about right. Sorry if I have totally depressed you. :(
 
I wonder whether 'ideal second pony' would be a good description of him rather than 'suit confident beginner'? then when people phone you can say that he would be perfect for a complete novice but you do need a little confidence with him becuae of xyz

I'd also echo the others you need a good confo shot (preferably without tack) on there, a flat work one and probaby one of him jumping coloured fences as all the shots you have of him are XC. Why don't you have a photo sesh with him over the easter break. pick a bright day,l get him scrubbed up (and even plaited up), clean tack, numnah etc and snap away!

My friend is trying to sell a TB, which although in my opinion is overpriced, and she hasn't had any calls at all... its not just you!
 
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