Help with ad please

[monkeybum13]

I put my pony on lots websites last weekend but in my frees at school today I attempted at a more in-depth advert. It would be great to hear what you lovely HHO would add/remove from it.

Thanks in advance

13HH Liver Chestnut Welsh Section B gelding, 15yrs by Brockwell Prince Charming. Registered and Passported.

Won and Placed Dressage, SJ, WHP, M&M, Combined Training

Excellent hack and is brilliant in the heaviest of traffic. Will happily go over motorway bridges/subways and through water.

Good to catch/clip/shoe. He will load into trailer or horsebox and is always good to travel alone or in company. At a show he can be left on the box quietly and doesn’t mind horses being taken in/out of the trailer alongside him.

He would need a competent rider to carry on competing (off lead rein) but is unflappable so would also make an ideal lead rein pony.

Open to any vetting.

He has been with us for 8yrs and is now sadly outgrown, rider onto horses so 5* home is essential. If right home is found we are open to offers.
1100 ono to include full wardrobe of leather tack and lots of rugs

Advert on PC Website

 

[Hippona]

I think thats a cracking advert...nothing to add from me

 

[monkeybum13]

Thanks. Glad to hear I'm doing something right

 

[Booboos]

He sounds lovely! Hope you find him a great home!

 

[brightmount]

He sounds lovely. Only one thing, I wouldn't put "If right home is found we are open to offers." .... because you have advertised him for a good price anyway and put ono, and you have already said 5* home essential, so it goes without saying you want the "right" home for him. I think you are opening yourself up to being knocked down on the price before you've even started and the last thing you want is a bargain hunter.

Other than that, very nice!

 

[monkeybum13]

Thanks. I will rephrase the advert later

 

[wildwest]

hes lovely and v reasonably priced
and a very good advert

 

[legaldancer]

I think the same as LadyArcher. The price is very reasonable if he comes with full wardrobe. I noticed he's wearing a nose net. That may put some people off if they haven't encountered a head shaker before. I recently sold one & I too didn't mention it in the ad, but it was there for all to see in the pics. When they call or come to see him you could mention it then.

 

[monkeybum13]

Yes we tell people when they call and explain how he needs it in summer and spring and if you take it off during winter he is fine. Once they realise that you can compete in all disciplines with it on they are fine (including showing/WHP if you speak to judge). The only reason it's not in the advert is because it's not a "vice" that has to be noted.

Thanks for the advice on rephrashing it

..and all your lovely compliments