Help wording advert please!!

[DellaMoon]

I'm taking some pictures of my mare tonight so I can place her advert in horse and hound and on the BD website. I have an advert running on horsequest but I have had no interest yet. I'm not in a rush for her to go but I don't want to waste money on badly worded adverts. Here are her stats, would anyone mind stringing the bullet points into sentences?!!

3 yrs mare, standing 15.2, should make 16hh
German Dressage breeding including De Niro, Paredemarsch I.
Papered and branded black Westphalien.
Outstanding temperament, never acts like a 3 yr old.
Good to trim, groom, catch - hasn't seen much traffic, I haven't clipped her and have no transport so couldn't say what she's like with these.
Backed and schooling in walk, trot and canter.
Lightly hacked off road in company.
Very expressive off the floor paces, fantastic walk as well.
Easiest horse I have ever backed.
Very affectionate and easy going, can be turned out with anything.


Am I missing anything?!!

Thank you in advance!!

 

[tasel]

How much work done exactly - as she's only 3, how long has she been under the saddle?

Suitable for what type of rider? Is she a 3-year-old that needs a LOT of work or a 3-year-old ging on 30 sort of horse that can be ridden by a rider who is not a professional - I know plenty of people say NO to young horses straightaway, because of their age, though have a friend who bought a youngster two years ago that never caused a problem and acted pretty grown up.

Pity, she sounds EXACTLY like what I would be looking at... next year (end of next year, as saving up) to replace my 5-year-old mare who can't be ridden (bought her years ago, but she suffered unfortunate injury). Such a pity you can't loan her to me in the meantime.

 

[galaxy]

I've seen your ad. I'm about to sell a very similar mare and my thoughts when I saw your ad was that you were asking a lot of money.

Sorry, but this is genuinely what I thought.

 

[tasel]

I've seen your ad. I'm about to sell a very similar mare and my thoughts when I saw your ad was that you were asking a lot of money.

Sorry, but this is genuinely what I thought.

How do you guys all find horses so quickly on Horsequest? It's a website I just can't get the hang of because of all the different categories, etc.

 

[galaxy]

I saw it a couple of weeks ago and recognised her from on here. Prob with HorseQuest is that I expect it's at the bottom of the page now and buyers don't keep scrolling. It is a funny site that one!

 

[tasel]

Ah! Finally got there... price-wise a bit on the high side. We are no longer in the days of endless borrowing and equity release, so people will buy what they can afford.

If any of you guys have similar horses at the end of next year, let me know!

 

[DellaMoon]

I totally understand what you are saying about price, I am testing the market at the moment to see what happens, like I said I am in no rush. She really is a special mare so want the right home for her. Thank you for all your advice. She is a 3 going on 30 type horse but obviously wouldn't be suitable for a total novice. She has been under saddle for about 3 weeks now, only being ridden for 15-20 mins 3/4 times a week.

 

[Kat]

I totally understand what you are saying about price, I am testing the market at the moment to see what happens, like I said I am in no rush. She really is a special mare so want the right home for her. Thank you for all your advice. She is a 3 going on 30 type horse but obviously wouldn't be suitable for a total novice. She has been under saddle for about 3 weeks now, only being ridden for 15-20 mins 3/4 times a week.

I'm looking at the moment (not for a three year old though) and I never use horsequest. I think it is really user unfriendly so I just don't bother, I visit horsemart and horse deals most often because the search facility makes it easy.

 

[spotty_pony]

3 year old Westphalian mare to make 16hh. Currently standing at 15.2hh, this lovely natured German mare has been backed and lightly schooled and hacked in company. Has three extravagant paces. Ideal Dressage Prospect. Straight forward but not novice ride. Lovely temperament and easy to do. Excellent bloodlines including De Niro and Paredemarsch I. 5* home wanted for this young horse with a lot to give.

How does that sound?

 

[DellaMoon]

Brilliant!!! Thank you!

 

[DellaMoon]

Well we got some pictures tonight but none good enough for an advert so will try again tomorrow. Here they are though;