HHO Dogs Diary

[CorvusCorax]

Hi guys, hope you had a good week!

Wee Sister tells me she is having pups and she has been to the vets and everything for a check-up.
She has started nesting. But she says she doesn't know who the dad is. Mentallist.
Small Mum says it is the "Immaculate Contraception" or something, and that Wee Sister will have to be 'neutralised', which apparently is like what happened to me when I was 'castigated'.
By the way, has anyone seen my boy bits? They have been missing ever since I went for my castigation

On Saturday I saw a spiky looking bird on the property.
Small Mum said was a 'hawk' so I tried to geddit.
It stuck it's tounge out and said 'hardy har, slowcoach' and then flew off. HOW RUDE!

I will get him next time.
I wonder why Small Mum was laughing hysterically?
When she abandoned me yet again yesterday said she was off to see a hawk too, at the 'bear show'. Why couldn't I go? Sounds like heaven to me!

As I was so good at training last week, and as my human great auntie, who is one of my trainers, decided to tell everyone at a meeting this morning how well I was doing, and that I was ready for this stupid test thing, and that Small Mum has worked wonders with me, I decided to prove everyone wrong and acted like a big eejit just to show Small Mum up.
Does anyone know what 'fupping barsteward dog' means?

My training partner Red was also acting the eejit today too. He slipped his lead and went wheeeeeeeeee! all around the training field at 100mph while his owner tried to catch him. He was having a great time. I was going to join him, even though I was supposed to be in a long downstay. Small Mum, being the spoilsport she is, managed to leap over and stand on my lead so I couldn't join in.
Killjoy!

She then abandoned me for the pretty dogs and ran around in circles with them. After that, I think she went a bit mad because she put on the funny giant arm thing and ran off.
Desperate Dan, one of the other dogs at the club, ran after her and got it back off her.
She did this three times. She almost tripped up a couple of times because Dan went crashing into her - all the people watching cheered when this happened.
Did they want her to fall or something? I suppose it would have been funny

Dan says he is going to be a police dog when he grows up and that his job is to rescue the giant arm off loads of different people who run away with it.
He says Small Mum was the easiest yet because she is tiny and he thought it was great fun trying to knock her over

Ah, it is time she had a taste of her own medicine.

At the end of training there was a really loud noise and everyone looked up and Small Mum said "Wow, look, there's the hawk! I saw it yesterday!"
She is such an idiot, it was an aeroplane thing and didn't look anything like the bird that I almost caught yesterday.

Anyway, that's all my news from the week - tell me about yours!

B

 

[rema]

Hi everyone Floss here..firstly i have to tell you and you dogs will find this hilarious but mum dosent,,i have just farted and it is stinking...mum is pulling lots of funny faces and swearing at me but i just pretended i was asleep.

Right my week has been a good one we went down the beach yesterday for the first time in ages as mum said there would be too many people down there in the summer holidays.mum threw my frizbee into a really deep pool of water and i refused to go and get it so mum had to with just her trainers on hehehe.

Had lots of walks and play times,,i have to go to work with my mum everyday for three weeks as my nan has gone on her holidays and she looks after me when mum is at work.I like going to work as i get to go to lots of new places and run around.

My paws are all better now mum gave me some Arnica stuff and it made my paws better.So i can run around like a loony again.
I;m off for my tea now and a kip as i'm dog tired

Take care everybody and be good (NOT) for the humans.

Floss.

 

[tamsinkb]

Hi Guys - Bruce here - gosh have I had an interesting week!

On Monday I was at the village fete with mum when we met up with my human friends Nick & Angie - Nick took me to one side and said to me ' Do you know you are going to have your pockets picked on Friday?' which I didn't have a clue about (still don't have a clue about what he meant, but it sounded bad!) Then mum and nick had a mass debate (

) about the pros & cons, with mum being adamant it was for the best as it would be nasty to have all these 'urges' but not be allowed to do anything about it ( I think I understand what she means!) Anyhow, I thought I'd better see if I could get out of having my pockets picked so I wracked my brains about what I could do.......then I remembered that about 4 weeks ago I had a cut leg and had to have some stitches...surely i could use that as an excuse.

Nothing happened until thursday, when somehow the scar managed to get infected!!!So mum had to take me to the vets a day early.

Now don't get me wrong - I LOVE going to the vets - all the ladies who work there adore me and make a huge fuss of me! Anyway, mum & i were in the waiting room when the vet nurse came over and said ' Hello gorgeous wiggle-bottom!' (she's a lovely girl!) and then commented that she didn't think that she'd be seeing me until the next day. So I put on my 'woe is me' face ( you know, the one that only spangles can do properly) and showed her my leg. She said' Oops - no op for you then' at which I grinned and waggled my bottom even more!! When we saw the lovely lady vet she said roughly the same thing, but in a sexy Aussie accent - she also said that I must have planned it, but I wasn't going to get away that easily - and booked me in for next thursday! Then she squeezed my leg and I was very brave, and a huge amount of gung came out of a small hole in my leg - she seemed to think one of the dissolvable stitches didn't!

So - I now have some tablet to take twice a day which are meant to be palatable but I worked out that if I refuse to eat it I get a nice treat!

The only downside is that Mum says I can't go to Blenheim with her next saturday as she seems to think I will have a lampshade on my head ( Duh - why would I do that!), But I am going to Angie and Nick's for the day, which will be fun...only problem is -I hope mum packs my food & treats as they are both vegan so no nice meat in their fridge!


Have a good week

Bruce

 

[Spudlet]

Hello

Well this week I went to Burghley which was great and I made a great discovery - you know those great big clumpy hoofed things that stand around in paddocks all day eating grass? Well some of them can run and jump and everything! I was really surprised the first time one did it, then I decided they were going very slowly and actually that I could go much faster but the human wouldn't let me show everybody

She was really mean and kept me on the lead all day, and cos I was in my harness I couldn't even escape and prove what a good three-day eventer I would be

There were loads of nice people who all thought I was very handsome (true, it's a cross I must bear) and admired my smart haircut but none of them would share their chips. One nice lady gave me some ham though

I liked her best

The human says next week we're going to Blenheim so I am going to practice my jumping just in case she decides I can show the big clumpy things how it's done!