Horses really do break your heart...

Lolo

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I came across this photo the other day while I was on the hunt for a video. It's me on my old boy, at Holkham beach. He was PTS August 2011. He didn't do total retirement- god knows, we tried.

I miss him so very much. I had the pleasure of owning him from when I was 13 to when I was 18, and he gave me so much confidence and so many amazing experiences.

He was a truly mad little horse. He was unbeatable in a jump off- I had to look at the next fence and he'd be off, turning on a sixpence and weaving through wings. He was a nightmare to try and do a dressage test on. He'd go beautifully, then get bored and take off or start doing his ministry of silly walks thing. It was a fairly regular occurrence to get straight 7s, then straight 3s. We couldn't canter out hacking, he was batty out hunting and you couldn't tell him anything.

You couldn't tie him up anywhere. He took it as a challenge. He could undo any knot (we tried them all!) and would then come and find us to let us know he'd been ever so clever. He could undo bra strap, unflick kickbolts and refused to eat out of a bucket. He'd pull hair and give the farrier a wedgie. But everyone loved him- he was so human in his way of behaving. He'd spent so much time mostly in the company of people he seemed to think he was one, if not better than!

He was, in short, a nightmare. But he was also the most astonishingly perfect horse I've ever had the pleasure of meeting. He'd do anything to help you out, was as genuine as they came and took me from being scared to canter to jumping round 3' XC courses in under a year.

Every day, I miss him. And then I find photos like this lurking away somewhere and it breaks my heart because he's gone.

Tell me, why do we do this?!
 

KSR

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^^^ this.. I lost my Clevie mare and BD appy 367 days apart..

We carry on because we love and cannot help loving..

x
 

Chestnutmare

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I also feel the same, this year will be 3yrs since I lost my horse of a lifetime I think about him everyday, miss him like crazy too, but loved every minute of me owning him... no one can ever take the fond memories away for sure.

I'm currently having my heart broken once again for different reasons....
its awful isn't it!!!

Chin up chick...
 

MrsMozart

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Hugs hunny.

I know the feeling. I just opened another laptop, to see a picture of me and my first horse Tiggy. I had such a happy smile. Tiggy looks bright eyed and beautiful. I remember the day, nearly four years ago, better than I remember yesterday.
 

vickyb

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You gave your horse a happy life - remember the good times. He was loved and cared for - what more could any animal wish for? It does get easier as the years go by.
 

benson21

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But horses can also mend your heart. I was a broken person when we had our accident and benson died, but Donovan has helped heal my heart, and my soul!
 

AndiK

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I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

Alfred Lord Tennyson
 

Janesomerset

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Spotsrock, you put that so well. When my big horse died, I said it was like living in a void afterwards, but "emotional desert" is so much more accurate. I only managed 4 months before another equine joined us.
 

Cheiro1

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But horses can also mend your heart. I was a broken person when we had our accident and benson died, but Donovan has helped heal my heart, and my soul!

^^^^ This.

It does get easier as time goes on, it never goes, but it becomes easier to smile at the memories rather than cry.
 

Tash88

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Like the others have said, you have to cherish the wonderful times (like in your photo), and the life you gave them. My boy Lukie had to be put to sleep in October 2011 after a sudden and serious attack of colitis, he was only 11 and I'd had him for nearly four years. He was very quirky and timid so I had to do a lot of work with him; he was my horse of a lifetime but I'd like to think I will have another one. I was devastated and miss him so much, I have bought another lovely horse which is helping but Lukie will always have a very special (and big) place in my heart - he is still the background on my laptop and I have photos of him everywhere.
 

juliette

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I think all animals bring lots of fun, love, laughter but inevitably heart break.

I lost a dog whowas only aged 2, I then had a break with no animals for over 10 years. Always swore I would never have one again, then my husband and kids persuaded me to have another one..... best decision I ever made. That led to giving me to confidence to keep increasing the numbers and we now have 2 dogs, 4 chickens and a horse!! Not bad for someone never having an animal again. You will never forget them, but all the good memories will stay and the sad ones do fade.

Please don't leave it too long before taking the plunge and getting another, you won't regret it.
 
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