Horses that groom you back ! HELP

M

Michellehenry

Active Member
Joined
23 January 2009
Messages
43
Visit site
Does anyone have a horse that grooms them back ? Mine does it all the time and even moves himself to position me where he wants a scratch. I have looke din some books to see whether this is disrespectful and should be discouraged or not. Some say that it is and some say that it isn't and that they are just bonding.

Does anyone else have this ? and should I be discouraging my boy from doing this if I am letting him get into bad habits ?
 
I don't think its disrespectful.
I see it as them accepting you as a friend so to speak.
As to whether you should discourage it, depends on whether you think its sweet or if you don't like it.
Personally, I'd let him do it, makes me laugh when they do it.

I think of it as, if it was disrespectful, horses in the field would tell off any horse that tried it, but they don't.
 
I let mine nuzzle me but no teeth!!!
If he uses teeth i stop gromming him until he stops nibbling, then continue, he has now worked out he can nuzzle but no teeth. . . i know he is only being friendly but teeth still hurt lol

:-D
 
I give my mare a good scratch & she grooms my arm in return. Am wondering now if she is trying to tidy me up a bit!!
 
Haha poops, mine grooms back if i get the right spot. I also stop if they use teeth and then continue, he now doesnt use teeth! I think its lovely
smile.gif
. A horse on our yard also loves screatches and he will angle himself so you scratch the right spot and move really close to you when he wants one etc. Also very cute as they are not pushing against me, but the more in your face one is 17.1hh! He goes as far as stalking you in the field for a scratch, its very funny
 
Yes mine will start on me first! Again, I don't like the teeth and she tries to remember this but sometimes gets abit carried away! I love it, think it's definitely bonding, and am honoured she likes me that much. I'd feel guilty discouraging it, think that's a bit mean!
smirk.gif
 
My horse grooms me when i give her a scratch on her mane, i think it's really sweet that yr horse trusts you enough to groom you. The only thing i don't like is when my horse sinks her teeth into my leg or hip
crazy.gif
I can't see anything wrong with it....
 
I see it as some bonding time. I can't see it doing any harm as my horse seems to love me for doing it. When he's in my bad books he certainly doesn't get any scratching and I kinda hope he gets the connection.

Had to put a stop to bum scratching though as I had both mine coming at me from different directions to "offer" me their bottoms and quite often I'd get sandwiched or squashed against a fence or wall! Nothing nasty, they just love the attention.

Also my horse really stretches himself into the most peculiar positions when I scratch him in the right places but I think that it must be a good warm up for riding, a bit like us doing yoga and stretching?
grin.gif
 
Mine pins me in the corner in her stable, or just barges into me in the field when she wants a scratch (usually her bum her around her udder area). She hardly ever scratches me back - just thoroughly luxuriates in the service I am offering her. Clearly I am not worthy, being simply her slave!
 
I love it when my boy grooms me back! Especially as when I got him just over a year ago he was so scared of people that when you walked into his stable he would run to the back and cower
frown.gif
I think it shows how far he has come
grin.gif
 
Another fan of it. Just have to be careful around frankie as he will use it as an excuse to twing your bra strap or pull a wedge
blush.gif
 
I think that it can be disrespectful if the horse is constantly pushing you round and demanding to be groomed/scratched,especially if it means you are unable to stop them.

Charles likes to have a scratch but its only on my terms.

It tottaly amzes me the amount of people who allow there horses to push them around, pin them against a wall ect for a scratch. That is disrespectful, and can lead on to othr behaviours if the horse always gets away with what it wants by using its bodyweight against you.

Just as you would not accept a dog to be jummping up on your lap every time you sat down.

It may seem flattering that your horse grooms you in return , or asks for a scratch this way. However i can think of nothing worse than having a horse constantly messing with you. some peopel on my yard take adges to take up becasue there horse want to scratch and mess, and the owners have no control. there is a time and a place and you should have control!
 
Horses will groom others who are dominant in the field so I don't think it is neccesarily disrespectful. I enjoy it on my terms and without teeth!
 
Well you know what KingCharles? I've had my girl for 15 years and my scratching her has NEVER led on to any bad behaviour, she backs up or moves over by verbal command, has respect for my personal space and doesn't barge me or go ahead of my shoulder when I lead her. I signal to her when the scratch period is over and although she might sigh deeply, she accepts it. Funnily enough, I think that spending time doing something nice for my horse is not wasted time, and since she spent years carting me about when I wanted it, she has more than earned a bit of extra and very personal attention. I happen to believe that thinking a horse is a machine that you press buttons to get what you want, is pretty disrespectful to THEM.
 
Every time i groom my horse she grooms me back she even cocks her back leg like a dog so i can scratch in there, my hubby does say it look very perverted lol .

i love her grooming me back , its also very good if my back is sore i just go out to the horse and she rubs it for me !
 
[ QUOTE ]
Well you know what KingCharles? I've had my girl for 15 years and my scratching her has NEVER led on to any bad behaviour, she backs up or moves over by verbal command, has respect for my personal space and doesn't barge me or go ahead of my shoulder when I lead her. I signal to her when the scratch period is over and although she might sigh deeply, she accepts it. Funnily enough, I think that spending time doing something nice for my horse is not wasted time, and since she spent years carting me about when I wanted it, she has more than earned a bit of extra and very personal attention. I happen to believe that thinking a horse is a machine that you press buttons to get what you want, is pretty disrespectful to THEM.

[/ QUOTE ]
Not once did i say it was wrong to give your horse a scratch or to engage in mututal grooming. I spend a lot of free time with my horses, and always have done, and ive always taken on problem horses/youngsters.

I dont ride every single day! I sometimes take my horse up intot he indoor school and we play games, have a scratch i have always had very strong bonds with my horses, becasue we respect each other. They knwo what is acceptable behaviour, and i reward them for there good behaviour, its a 2 way street! As long as a horse respects your personal space, moces over when asked and is not in yoru face all the time insisting on a scratch, then nbop i dont think it is bad to engage in mutual grooming. However the amount of peopel who allow there horses to barge them around, reverse into them, pin them against walls demanding a scratch. Its unreal.

I have ussualy picked up the pieces from other people who have allowed there horses to become disrepectful. While a submissive horse will groom a dominant horse in the field, th e dominant horse holds the strings, and a suptle sign will see the submissive horse backing off. I have a very dominant horse on permamant loan, who is also aggresive. We engage in mututal grooming, however i make sure that i make it perfectly clear when it is acceptable and when it isnt. We have a fabulous bond, he will even get down int he indoor and let me sit with him. I know where his itchy places are, and i knwo what he likes. He knows that standing there quietly will result in a scratch from me. When i first took him on he had a habing of almost bowling you over with his head as soon as you dismounted. Trying to scrape his bridle off on you. this was very rude behaviour. He know stands quietly when i dismount and is rewarded for waiting, by me spending a good 10 mins grooming his face when i take the bridle off.

Its about give and take, way too many peopel allow there horses to misbehave and dominante them. Ussualy becasue they think its sweet, or that they dont know better. My youngsters never mouthed or nipped people, they where tuaght from day one that it was unacceptable behaviour. Its about creating a partnership.
 
Likewise, no-one has said their horse "constantly" wants scratching, is bargey or whatever. Building a partnership relies to some degree on using each other's language. My horse had to learn spoken words, I have learned to understand and mimic her body language. She isn't rough when she asks me to scratch her, she just uses a totally different way of asking me than she would if she was asking another horse to groom her, and I think that is rather clever of her. It is quite likely that she asks me more often than some horses, but as she has advanced arthritis and can't turn around and reach beyond the girth line, she relies on me to do the bits she can't reach.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top