Hovis' friday diary

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Hovis_and_SidsMum

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Dear diary
I think i might be in trouble again. This time I'm not sure its entirely my fault but still I have to shoulder the blame. Life is, at times, so unfair.
As you will know from my show report last week mum and I went showing last weekend. I behaved, didn't kick the judge who was rude abut me and mum was pleased.
So far so good......
On monday mum gave me the day off and fed me carrots = ace day.
On tuesday mum took me for a little ride on my own and we had a nice time round the field. Then on the way back there was a very large chandlers gas lorry coming down our drive. The driver was nice and stopped but the drive is very very narrow so to get past it i literally could feel it against my whiskers - with an electric fence at the other side of me.
i wasn't too sure but mum stoked my neck and said it would be ok, so keeping a wary eye on the beast i walked past it. Everyone who saw it said their horses wouldn't have gone past so i was rather chuffed with myself.
Then came the oooops point of the week.
Aunty Sarah has a friend who having abd time at the moment. To cheer her up aunty sarah decided to take her for a ride and borrowed me to take her friend. So fit mare and i went stubble field racing! Yeeehaaaaa! It was ACE fun! We wet so fast! For miles! Man that girl has long legs and i had to work hard to keep up. Alas my recently snow white feathers didn't survive this encounter and did not return white. Aunty Sarah said mum would be mad about me being in stubble fields so we weren't allowed to tell her.
Three guesses who told her? Thats right - poofus bagus of the big gob. Mum was not amused.

To make things worse poofy is telling me he's going to burghley on saturday to meet his adoring fans. I didn't think you lot liked him? Anyway mum says its only a sponsored ride and I'm not allowed to go in case i get too strong and tank off with her. She has said i can go next year but I am well miffed. Fit mare is going with him too - its so not fair.
Omar says I'm not allowed to go because Burghley is a posh place and I'ma bog trotting commoner. Thats not true is it?

Anyway if any of you are going and see a very good looking [grudgingly though i admit that] poof having apoplexy over everything - that'll be my brother. Kick him for me!
 
Ha ha - excellent report Hovis. I think that was awful of Omar to say such a thing. You are luvly
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"Omar says I'm not allowed to go because Burghley is a posh place and I'm a bog trotting commoner"

PMSL. Though of course it's not true Hovis!!
 
Dearest Hovis

At least you have four hairy full glory legs - Stinky keeps calling me smelly pus spindle leg - but I do now have it looking a tiny bit fluffy and it don't smell now. He is very stuck up with week having been to a posh place called Addington and won lots.

I screwed up - I have been making Mum and Dad think I was still sore on my leg (careful flinches, slow walks, you know the score) so have done nothing for several weeks but be waited on - food and hay brought to me in the field and no exercise, great life. However, I was seen early this morning having a quick gallop round with a few bucks for fun. It was that sneaky old pony next door who told his mum who told mine what I had been doing.

Dad is now going to make me do some of this daft NH stuff walking backwards through poles tomorrow - if I can gallop around, I can do 10 mins walking the poles apparently. They say I need to have my manners reminded - I haven't forgot them, don't see the need to be nice when I am hungry and wanting my grub and people/Stinky are in the way. God gave me my size for a reason - I get first to eat
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Finally tell the idiot bro you are Clydesdale, Scottish and proud and he is an upper class over bred twit and should get his insults factually correct.

Lots of love,

Farra Clydesdale xxx
 
My Darling Hovis,

Please endeavour not to be too down heartened. You know you have true and loyal admirers, myself most definately included.

I am afraid Human is once again kn*ckered, so is incapable of writing what I wish to say. I think I should put her on Pink Powder.

Kindest and loving regards,

The Dizzy Blonde x

P.S. Poofbags is a ridiculous bag of horse hair!
 
Dear Hovis,

Poof Bags needs sorting out, I shall ask my mum to take me to Burghley so I can hide in a bush. I shall jump out as he passes and yell LOUDLY!
Then everyone will laugh at him for being such a poof.

Love Little Stig

P.S mum says I am not allowed to go, she says I am not big enough and jumping out of hedges is the kind of thing children do, not well behaved ponies.....Ha she wishes!
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Dear Hovis,

Poof Bags is lying to you about Burghley being too posh. After all, I went to Brechin Castle, and I'm only a little hairy pony of uncertain parentage! Everyone said how cute I was, too.

So if you want to go to Burghley next time, maybe you should think about not tanking off?? I know it's hard; I do it too if I get excited and confused: case in point, our lesson with the Evil Pole Lady tonight (though there weren't any poles, thank goodness).

Anyway, keep cheerful!

Carrots,
the Spooky Pony
 
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