Hovis_and_SidsMum
Well-Known Member
Dear diary
Today is very exciting. I might be getting a new sister to try out. Well I think Dad is supposed to be trying her for a while to see if he thinks shes any good at SJ but personally I think mum and Dad want to see if I like her.
Apparently thats only going to happen if she passes her vetting though. Seriously if she doesnt pass it she doesnt deserve to be called a sister of mine. When I had my vetting test the other guys at the yard told me what to do. So here are my tips for passing your vet test:
1. Dont bite the vet.
2. Dont kick the vet
3. Dont make the mistake of thinking the vet is moving in for a snog when they hold that funny light up to your eyes take it from me theyre not.
4. Dont think its amusing to look cross eyed at the vet when theyre studying you at close range. Apparently that can mean they think youre BLIND
5. When asked to trot in a line dont think its funny to change the beat of your foot sounds halfway down the yard. Whilst its quite funny to see your mums face the vet usually seems to think this means you are LAME
6. For once summon up the energy to lift your own feet up rather than expect the vet to do it. Humans apparently view this as a sign of something sinister i.e. you are LAME. We all know its more a sign of I cant be arsed and youre daft enough to do it for me but heh whatever works for them.
7. When the vet holds you leg up till its dead dont hop around the yard on 3 legs screaming like a girl for 10 mins afterwards. This apparently means you are LAME. Instead take it like a man and run off on all four legs whilst surreptitiously taking a note of the vets car registration number to arrange a small accident at a later date.
8. Try not to sound like you smoke 50 a day when asked to run round in circles whilst its apparently ok for mum or Dad to be unfit and slightly overweight its a complete crime if we are seen to be.
9. Deep sighing and snorting whilst running round in circles is not seen as you expressing your disgust at being made to run but may mean you have WIND issues. The fact most of the horse on my yard have wind issues and its not from the front end seems to have escaped the attention of most vets I have met.
10. Finally one for us men only - if the vets asks you to cough whilst holding parts of your body that a man shouldnt hold, forget point 1 and 2 and beat the living daylights out of him. Hes not really conducting a vet test and is possibly just a pervert
So we shall have to see if this girl can pass her test I shall let you know soon. I dont know what she called but I do know she is ginger. There goes my standing in the neighbourhood again.
In the meantime the white stuff has continued to mean we cant go out. Mum takes me for walks in hand but its v v BORING. I thought it would be most fun to put my nose in the white stuff the other day and then flick my head up sharply thus covering mum in snow. Note to self dont do that again, that leadrope stings more when its cold
Anyway until next week I leave you with my current conundrum. What do I do if this girl passes her vet test and shes a fox?
Today is very exciting. I might be getting a new sister to try out. Well I think Dad is supposed to be trying her for a while to see if he thinks shes any good at SJ but personally I think mum and Dad want to see if I like her.
Apparently thats only going to happen if she passes her vetting though. Seriously if she doesnt pass it she doesnt deserve to be called a sister of mine. When I had my vetting test the other guys at the yard told me what to do. So here are my tips for passing your vet test:
1. Dont bite the vet.
2. Dont kick the vet
3. Dont make the mistake of thinking the vet is moving in for a snog when they hold that funny light up to your eyes take it from me theyre not.
4. Dont think its amusing to look cross eyed at the vet when theyre studying you at close range. Apparently that can mean they think youre BLIND
5. When asked to trot in a line dont think its funny to change the beat of your foot sounds halfway down the yard. Whilst its quite funny to see your mums face the vet usually seems to think this means you are LAME
6. For once summon up the energy to lift your own feet up rather than expect the vet to do it. Humans apparently view this as a sign of something sinister i.e. you are LAME. We all know its more a sign of I cant be arsed and youre daft enough to do it for me but heh whatever works for them.
7. When the vet holds you leg up till its dead dont hop around the yard on 3 legs screaming like a girl for 10 mins afterwards. This apparently means you are LAME. Instead take it like a man and run off on all four legs whilst surreptitiously taking a note of the vets car registration number to arrange a small accident at a later date.
8. Try not to sound like you smoke 50 a day when asked to run round in circles whilst its apparently ok for mum or Dad to be unfit and slightly overweight its a complete crime if we are seen to be.
9. Deep sighing and snorting whilst running round in circles is not seen as you expressing your disgust at being made to run but may mean you have WIND issues. The fact most of the horse on my yard have wind issues and its not from the front end seems to have escaped the attention of most vets I have met.
10. Finally one for us men only - if the vets asks you to cough whilst holding parts of your body that a man shouldnt hold, forget point 1 and 2 and beat the living daylights out of him. Hes not really conducting a vet test and is possibly just a pervert
So we shall have to see if this girl can pass her test I shall let you know soon. I dont know what she called but I do know she is ginger. There goes my standing in the neighbourhood again.
In the meantime the white stuff has continued to mean we cant go out. Mum takes me for walks in hand but its v v BORING. I thought it would be most fun to put my nose in the white stuff the other day and then flick my head up sharply thus covering mum in snow. Note to self dont do that again, that leadrope stings more when its cold
Anyway until next week I leave you with my current conundrum. What do I do if this girl passes her vet test and shes a fox?
