Hovis_and_SidsMum
Well-Known Member
Dear diary
What an interesting week I have had. As I told you in last weeks diary Mum had planned a busy few days for me which started with the dreaded cold bath on Friday night. After strict instructions to levitate all night thus not getting my newly white feathers dirty Mum returned in the morning. Unfortunately so did the men with the concrete lorries, the mixers, the rollers and the big trucks
After much swearing mum took me across some very nasty uneven ground and loaded me onto the lorry with a dumper truck running at the side of the ramp. Now I have to point out not many boys would have calmly walked up into the lorry with such a scary beast rattling away inches from their legs so I was feeling rather pleased with myself.
We got to the place we were going and I noted mum had put on those nice clean jodphurs that I like wiping my nose down so I was very excited. So was mum judging by the language she used when Dad informed her I was on three legs with a back shoe hanging off ..So we turned round and came back home again. Dad then swore constantly for 10 minutes whilst he removed both my back shoes and the large piece of concrete that was wedged under my left back shoe.
Anyway I was sort of relieved not to be poncing around in circles and was v excited about going to evil army mans house the next day.
Next day came and fancy pants and I got on the lorry, we were closer together than normal something I didnt understand until we pulled up on another yard and a strange mare got on . She was with Aunty Sarah and her name was Snazzy (or something like that). It turns out she is Aunty Sarahs new team ride and is an ex-eventer at a high level but best still she didnt fancy my brother!! Yippee!! Finally I have a brother whom women dont swoon over. In fact she tried to eat his head most of the way to evil army mans house. Hilarious.
When we got to evil army mans house I got off the lorry and headed for his ménage looking forward to a morning of jumping and lots of yeehaa cantering. Alas no. He seems fixated with the idea of me poncing about carrying my own head at the minute. Whats wrong with the man? What happened to him? I think he might have had a bang on the head.
Why is it that fancy pants got to jump? Huumm? Though he and Dad did part company so maybe they might have to do boring flat work too next time? Meanwhile Snazzy and I got cosy on the lorry whilst fancy pants was riding and shes pretty cool for an older lady. Mum told me to stop drooling as she was old enough to be my grandma but heh Im not fussy I can snog a GILF, I dont mind.
Snazzy went off for her lesson flat work too I noticed and fancy pants and I had a brief chat about not ruining my chances of scoring on the way home. Alas he fell out with her and Im not sure if Ill see her again. Ah well we had a brief moment over the haynet so I guess thatll have to do.
On Monday we went to cool new shoes mans house to be shod. OMG. Mum needs to start shoeing horses his house is AMAZING!! I got to be shod in this cool little room with a heat thing soothing my muscles it was v relaxing. Less relaxing was his stallion breathing down my neck in a very unmanly fashion. Cool New shoes man said the stallion might prefer men so I am now v v v scared. He kept calling to me and wiggling his top lip in a camp manner. Seriously dude there was women about pull yourself together. I am starting to think I must give off more camp signals than an Indian Teepee convention. Why do men always like me? Fancy pants was in trouble for being a fidget bottom and trashing the yard. I was of course on best behaviour and everyone loved me its only natural after all.
Anyway diary I think mum said I could have some fun this weekend and go and play on my XC bank so Im off to start practising by jumping over fancy pants shadow on the grass. Laters ..
What an interesting week I have had. As I told you in last weeks diary Mum had planned a busy few days for me which started with the dreaded cold bath on Friday night. After strict instructions to levitate all night thus not getting my newly white feathers dirty Mum returned in the morning. Unfortunately so did the men with the concrete lorries, the mixers, the rollers and the big trucks
After much swearing mum took me across some very nasty uneven ground and loaded me onto the lorry with a dumper truck running at the side of the ramp. Now I have to point out not many boys would have calmly walked up into the lorry with such a scary beast rattling away inches from their legs so I was feeling rather pleased with myself.
We got to the place we were going and I noted mum had put on those nice clean jodphurs that I like wiping my nose down so I was very excited. So was mum judging by the language she used when Dad informed her I was on three legs with a back shoe hanging off ..So we turned round and came back home again. Dad then swore constantly for 10 minutes whilst he removed both my back shoes and the large piece of concrete that was wedged under my left back shoe.
Anyway I was sort of relieved not to be poncing around in circles and was v excited about going to evil army mans house the next day.
Next day came and fancy pants and I got on the lorry, we were closer together than normal something I didnt understand until we pulled up on another yard and a strange mare got on . She was with Aunty Sarah and her name was Snazzy (or something like that). It turns out she is Aunty Sarahs new team ride and is an ex-eventer at a high level but best still she didnt fancy my brother!! Yippee!! Finally I have a brother whom women dont swoon over. In fact she tried to eat his head most of the way to evil army mans house. Hilarious.
When we got to evil army mans house I got off the lorry and headed for his ménage looking forward to a morning of jumping and lots of yeehaa cantering. Alas no. He seems fixated with the idea of me poncing about carrying my own head at the minute. Whats wrong with the man? What happened to him? I think he might have had a bang on the head.
Why is it that fancy pants got to jump? Huumm? Though he and Dad did part company so maybe they might have to do boring flat work too next time? Meanwhile Snazzy and I got cosy on the lorry whilst fancy pants was riding and shes pretty cool for an older lady. Mum told me to stop drooling as she was old enough to be my grandma but heh Im not fussy I can snog a GILF, I dont mind.
Snazzy went off for her lesson flat work too I noticed and fancy pants and I had a brief chat about not ruining my chances of scoring on the way home. Alas he fell out with her and Im not sure if Ill see her again. Ah well we had a brief moment over the haynet so I guess thatll have to do.
On Monday we went to cool new shoes mans house to be shod. OMG. Mum needs to start shoeing horses his house is AMAZING!! I got to be shod in this cool little room with a heat thing soothing my muscles it was v relaxing. Less relaxing was his stallion breathing down my neck in a very unmanly fashion. Cool New shoes man said the stallion might prefer men so I am now v v v scared. He kept calling to me and wiggling his top lip in a camp manner. Seriously dude there was women about pull yourself together. I am starting to think I must give off more camp signals than an Indian Teepee convention. Why do men always like me? Fancy pants was in trouble for being a fidget bottom and trashing the yard. I was of course on best behaviour and everyone loved me its only natural after all.
Anyway diary I think mum said I could have some fun this weekend and go and play on my XC bank so Im off to start practising by jumping over fancy pants shadow on the grass. Laters ..
