Hovis' friday diary

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Hovis_and_SidsMum

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Dear diary
Its been 7 months since the love of my life was tragically pts on Christmas eve. I have looked at other ladies and perhaps even felt a stirring of lust for a few but none have really taken my fancy. Well I think my heart may be mending……. More on that in a moment.
This week as mum is still lame Dad has taken me out. This week we have been out alone and then we went out with Dolly. Shes quite cute but older than me and a bit high maintenance. I don’t think she liked the fact that I had molasses all over my nose from the yummy yummy lickit mum and Dad got me the other day. Dad said it made me look even more like a ***** pony than normal – I’m not sure how much I normally look like one so I didn’t get it. What is a *****? Is it like those little dudes with the bad hair cuts that I see scuttling about at night?
Anyway Dolly Mum wanted to make sure I behaved before she would let Dolly come out with me to go fast so we walked………everywhere. YAWN. I’m sure my standing in the neighbourhood went up by being seen out with a lovely lady (rather than a bunch of chunky men) but still I’m far happier when we get to hurtle about the countryside like feathered Ferraris - alas not this time. I did try to behave myself so maybe Dollys mum will let us run next time.
The other night Dad gave me a shave and tried to scrub the molasses off my nose so mum wouldn’t see me looking like such a tramp. I don’t think mum can say anything about being a tramp – she went to the supermarket the other day wearing the hay on her head and my dinner down her back, how that all got there I have NO idea……..

Then last night SHE arrived. Hubba Hubba. I don’t even know her name yet but I walked into the barn and there she was - opposite my stable. Her ears went up and she neighed “hey big boy” – well in my head she did I couldn’t understand a word of it. Mum thinks she might be welsh so perhaps that explains it. Despite the language barrier she is HOT. I LIKE. Best of all only she and I came in last night so I had all night to prance about looking manly. She was impressed I could tell but I really wish mum wouldn’t stand there killing herself laughing. I do NOT look like a peacock I look like a stallion. Mum needs to get her wildlife books out – seriously she was ruining it all. I am trying to think of some good lines to entice her but mum says “How would you like to be wrapped in a hunk of Hovis” makes it sound like I want to turn her into a horseburger. Any ideas on some better ones?

Best of all they are cutting the field around us which only means one thing – stubble! A fit lady, stubble fields and molasses. Boy its been a good week………….
 
When all else goes mad on HHO of a week you can always rely on some things to stay the same...thank goodness for your diary Hovis! The surreptitious smearing of food remnants down an owner's back without them realising before they leave the yard is a high and subtle art form - well done H.
 
Dear Hovis,

That's great news about the new girl! I wish you the best of luck with her. I think the best technique might be to feign disinterest. Ignore her when she calls, groom her only when she starts it first, and be sure to kick her if she tries to get at the haynet before you. But always agree to share it, in the end.

This has certainly worked for me! I have a Welsh girlfriend too, now, in pony jail. She is grey, very young (though certainly no foal), and quite small. She does try to get in with the Carrot Lady, but I bite her if she tries, and the Carrot Lady, I have to say, is very good about paying me more attention than my girlfriend. And she never gives her treats, when I get treats. :)

I am intrigued, though, by "stubble fields". Why are they something good? It seems to me all the tasty grain has been taken out of them already? :confused:

Carrots,
the Spooky Pony
 
Thank you Hovis - only just got to your diary and what a great way to end the week. Good luck with your new lady - can't wait to hear if you get anywhere with her!
 
Now your Mum has posted those pics of you looking very handsome I don't see how the hot filly next door can fail to be impressed by your stunning good looks!

I would love to see a video of you prancing to impress her though!
 
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