Hovis_and_SidsMum
Well-Known Member
Dear diary
This week has seen the return of my status as the yards hairy version of Milton. Once again I have proved beyond doubt that whilst we are defying gravity us big hairy bottomed, feathery legged, big boys can really jump when we want to. More on that in a minute.
So last Friday saw Billy and I forced to go out in temperatures that would have fried a gecko. Luckily even mum and Aunty C were dripping with sweat so we just went for a sedate bimble out to the irrigation ponds and back. None the less I was sweating harder than a pig in a blanket so I over head mum say to Aunty C that drastic measures were needed.
So on Saturday the big guns turned up Dad and the clippers. To be honest I was so grateful to have all my hair off that for once I didnt worry about turning from my magnificent bronzed colour to cutesy baby seal colour. Oh and thats another thing I understand that mother was explaining this on my face book pages and used the words ginger and my name in the same sentence? I have to tell you all that mother is basically illterate when it comes to colour (its come sort of posh colour blindness) and thus cannot tell the difference between manly gleaming bronze and orange. I would not listen to her in the slightest if I were you I dont..........
So Dad removed the inches thick layer of hair and my yearly colour transformation was complete. Cue all the mums on the yard cooing about how cute I look and what amazing cheek bones I have. As usual my colour change was greeted with much come hither glances from the ladies especially dolly which Im never sure is because they think I look mighty fine or they think its a new man on the yard?
Then on Sunday morning I was loaded up into the lorry and we were off somewhere. Now mum wasnt in her nice clean cream jodhpurs that I like to wipe snot down so I assumed we werent going trotting pole competing and thus was a little baffled. Until we pulled up at HIS house. Thats right EAM. Now it has been some time since he beasted me last something I am very grateful for but still time has not dimmed his evilness. That said he did say I looked very smart with my new go faster clip and he was grateful Id been clipped so I didnt die on him. That did not bode well. What followed was a master class of athletics, a reminder that just because Im big doesnt mean I cant move and to be honest a display proving mum is finally getting some guts. We jumped loads! Including some very big red and yellow barrel things that seemed to affect mums breathing the first time we went over them. Can you be allergic to barrels? It was very hot but due to my slim lined cut only my legs were sweating and EAM did allow mum a few meagre gulps of water in between the work bit. EAM was over the moon with us (no moon in sight so proof if needed hes a bit gaga?) and was blown away by how weve improved (well clearly not blown away because he was still there cuddling me in an unmanly fashion?). We are apparently going again in a few weeks time. I see a future with star jumps back on the agenda............
When we got back to the yard HS was calling for me in his usual girlie fashion but then so was dolly. Sorry mate but my tastes run to prime fine mare not gangly geldings Hello Dolly!
I had Monday and Tuesday off as mum was working late and then as it was SO windy on weds mum lunged me. Remember last time? Our little fight over the whole run around in circles thing? Well I learnt my lesson and lunged beautifully. So I only had to do 20 minutes which was nice. One day I will learn comply with mum = shorter time doing it and less hassle.
Then yesterday the other man in my life came to see me Cool New shoes Man. He too was very nice about me making me start to wonder if there is something going on? CNSM is always taking the mick out of me but yesterday he said my diary was fab and very well written. That he recommends it to all his clients. That I am very talented. Huuummmm. Do you think hes after a tip? Ill give him one dont back comb, your hair will fall out. He did moan as usual about how heavy my legs are, how I lean on him (yep Im not daft) and how much the wind was blowing everything around not exactly my fault. I know Im not your average horse but I dont have the man upstairs on speed dial. Well I dont have a phone either but lets not let small details like reality get in the way of a good bit of prose (do you like that? Im thinking of writing plays next working title The Carrot and I).
Talking of having the man upstairs on speed dial. What the chuff has he done to the weather? Its freezing! I am very grateful for mums decision to bring me inside, last night was evil. *smugly points out I was in the warm with my pjs on, tunes on the radio and two haynets whilst everyone else bar HS was outside freezing to death*
Anyway as I have a feeling despite the cold and the howling gales mum will still insist on taking me for a hack with Billy I guess Id better sign off and go and do some warm up exercises. Being a talented boy I can do lunges whilst eating. Laters.............
This week has seen the return of my status as the yards hairy version of Milton. Once again I have proved beyond doubt that whilst we are defying gravity us big hairy bottomed, feathery legged, big boys can really jump when we want to. More on that in a minute.
So last Friday saw Billy and I forced to go out in temperatures that would have fried a gecko. Luckily even mum and Aunty C were dripping with sweat so we just went for a sedate bimble out to the irrigation ponds and back. None the less I was sweating harder than a pig in a blanket so I over head mum say to Aunty C that drastic measures were needed.
So on Saturday the big guns turned up Dad and the clippers. To be honest I was so grateful to have all my hair off that for once I didnt worry about turning from my magnificent bronzed colour to cutesy baby seal colour. Oh and thats another thing I understand that mother was explaining this on my face book pages and used the words ginger and my name in the same sentence? I have to tell you all that mother is basically illterate when it comes to colour (its come sort of posh colour blindness) and thus cannot tell the difference between manly gleaming bronze and orange. I would not listen to her in the slightest if I were you I dont..........
So Dad removed the inches thick layer of hair and my yearly colour transformation was complete. Cue all the mums on the yard cooing about how cute I look and what amazing cheek bones I have. As usual my colour change was greeted with much come hither glances from the ladies especially dolly which Im never sure is because they think I look mighty fine or they think its a new man on the yard?
Then on Sunday morning I was loaded up into the lorry and we were off somewhere. Now mum wasnt in her nice clean cream jodhpurs that I like to wipe snot down so I assumed we werent going trotting pole competing and thus was a little baffled. Until we pulled up at HIS house. Thats right EAM. Now it has been some time since he beasted me last something I am very grateful for but still time has not dimmed his evilness. That said he did say I looked very smart with my new go faster clip and he was grateful Id been clipped so I didnt die on him. That did not bode well. What followed was a master class of athletics, a reminder that just because Im big doesnt mean I cant move and to be honest a display proving mum is finally getting some guts. We jumped loads! Including some very big red and yellow barrel things that seemed to affect mums breathing the first time we went over them. Can you be allergic to barrels? It was very hot but due to my slim lined cut only my legs were sweating and EAM did allow mum a few meagre gulps of water in between the work bit. EAM was over the moon with us (no moon in sight so proof if needed hes a bit gaga?) and was blown away by how weve improved (well clearly not blown away because he was still there cuddling me in an unmanly fashion?). We are apparently going again in a few weeks time. I see a future with star jumps back on the agenda............
When we got back to the yard HS was calling for me in his usual girlie fashion but then so was dolly. Sorry mate but my tastes run to prime fine mare not gangly geldings Hello Dolly!
I had Monday and Tuesday off as mum was working late and then as it was SO windy on weds mum lunged me. Remember last time? Our little fight over the whole run around in circles thing? Well I learnt my lesson and lunged beautifully. So I only had to do 20 minutes which was nice. One day I will learn comply with mum = shorter time doing it and less hassle.
Then yesterday the other man in my life came to see me Cool New shoes Man. He too was very nice about me making me start to wonder if there is something going on? CNSM is always taking the mick out of me but yesterday he said my diary was fab and very well written. That he recommends it to all his clients. That I am very talented. Huuummmm. Do you think hes after a tip? Ill give him one dont back comb, your hair will fall out. He did moan as usual about how heavy my legs are, how I lean on him (yep Im not daft) and how much the wind was blowing everything around not exactly my fault. I know Im not your average horse but I dont have the man upstairs on speed dial. Well I dont have a phone either but lets not let small details like reality get in the way of a good bit of prose (do you like that? Im thinking of writing plays next working title The Carrot and I).
Talking of having the man upstairs on speed dial. What the chuff has he done to the weather? Its freezing! I am very grateful for mums decision to bring me inside, last night was evil. *smugly points out I was in the warm with my pjs on, tunes on the radio and two haynets whilst everyone else bar HS was outside freezing to death*
Anyway as I have a feeling despite the cold and the howling gales mum will still insist on taking me for a hack with Billy I guess Id better sign off and go and do some warm up exercises. Being a talented boy I can do lunges whilst eating. Laters.............
