How can it hurt so much to sell even when we know its the right decision

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rafty

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My horse leaves tomorrow for his new home. I am heart broken about him leaving even though it has been a tough couple of years with him. I have learnt so much from him, and although he was hard to ride he really taught me HOW to ride. His manners, and his temperment were perfect. I know I have made the right decision, albeit a very hard decision.

I had my last lesson with him today, and spent lots of time brushing and grazing. I have cried so many tears about this and just hurts so much. I don;t know how I am going to manage tomorrow morning actually saying goodbye, and what will his new owners think of me being this quivering mess!!!

I hope that this little Fjord I have my heart set on works out, I really need to focus my attention somewhere, am taking my children to view her at the weekend. I feel like I want to rush time forwards a little bit, to of moved on so that I can have proof that is 100% the right to do. Really deep down I know it is, but it doesn;t seem to make it easier.

Has anyone else felt like this ?:(
 
:( You sound like you're sure you're doing the right thing. However you love this horse, so it will hurt. Reading your past posts, he clearly isn't right for you and your family, and he might be just right for the next person.

We can never be 100% sure things will work out, but you've done your best and should try to be kind to yourself.

Have a good cry when he goes, be glad of the time you had together and all the things you learnt, then look forward to your new adventure and fall in love with your pony with your children. :)
 
Two years ago when my daughter out grew her 12.2 we had to sell her, which was tough, but on top of that my partner was made redundant meaning we had to cut down to 1 horse. My mare at the time was the stereotypical chestnut mare, fine one day doolally the next! Way too much for my daughter coming off her pony and as we now needed one we could both ride I had to sell her :-( I was heartbroken and I know exactly how you feel, on a good day my mare would have been fine for my daughter but on an off day she really wasn't, it was such a tough decision but one I had to make :-(
Hope it goes well with viewing the fjord xx
 
sorry to hear you feel like this :( {hugs}

i think everybody has these feelings just before saying goodbye - its natural! hopefully you know deep down that its the right thing for you and the pony, and can you stay in touch with the new owners?

not quite the same as she was a youngster, but I recently sold my rising 2 year old filly that i'd had since weaning because I realised that actually small babies (human ones!) take up a lot more time than i thought! it wasnt till the trailer was pulling out the yard that i burst into tears!

BUT it was definitely the best thing I could have done, her new owner loves her to pieces, spends loads of time with her, and sends me little notes, pics and updates of how shes getting on - hopefully u will get the same

thinking of u tho :(
 
Hi. it gets better, once he is gone for will feel better. We tend to transfer human emotions to animals imagining they are thinking and feeling alsorts.

I had my boy 6 years we had many setbacks and breakthroughs, i made the decision to sell him as he loves and is happier working alot and I could no longer do this. I sold him to the perfect home and owner, but felt awful but even after 6 years he settled in his new home in days, was fine with his new friends. So please dont worry about him you know its a good home and you are doing the right thing. Try and smile and look forward :)
 
Yes I've been there & its hard. I sold my sports horse when I divorced, no choice at the time & 8 yrs later still miss him, but I know it was the right thing. Lovely man bought him, I went to visit their farm & they were a perfect home & their other horses & ponies were lovingly cared for, his wife realised I found it upsetting & even got the kids pony club instructor to come & give references. Still wish I could have kept him, but only from a selfish point of view, I know the horse is fine. I did keep my 14.2 though, so I had one to keep my mind off it. I'm not saying a new horse will replace him, but it will help take your mind off him in the short term while you get used to him not being around.
 
I know how you feel. After lots of soul searching, my daughter has decided to rehome her warmblood gelding. He was involved in a RTA last October, and now has issues with bikes and motorcycles. My daughter has realised that no matter how much we work with his issues, she will never be confident riding him out again. We have someone coming to see him on Saturday and if she decides to take him, even though he is not my horse, I am going to be a wreck when he goes. It is hard but we know that it is the right thing to do for him.

It will be hard and although another horse can not replace your boy, in your heart you will know that you are doing the right thing.

Big Hugs to you.
 
it hurts because you love him and no matter how much you know it's the right decision you can't just switch off your feelings for him:) it does get better though, ;)
 
They have said they will send me photos and I can visit if I'm ever passing their way. I know its a good home that I chose for him and he will be happy but I will miss him. God even sang to him through tears (actually more squeaked) boys to men, end of the road!!!! Think he thought I had actually lost the plot!!

I am trying to think on the bright side, of the pony we will get and how much fun I can have and my children.

Thanks for your words of support.
 
When I realized that I had to sell the spooky one I cried for a week.Loved him to bits, just couldn't ride him.If I could have afforded it I would have kept him as a field ornament and bought another one.But you know, it would have been very wrong.He loved working.He loved coming in, being groomed and tacked up and ridden.Everything.He would have been miserable.I sent him to a selling livery where he was very happy, I used to visit him about once or twice a week and it made things a bit easier, like weaning really.He went to a lovely home where he is very happy.I don't think he would come back to me even if he he could.I bought a horse that I could ride and am soooomuch happier.Tomorrow will be tough but each day will get better.Keep us all updated about the Haffie.
 
In the 1970s I had to part with my beloved old lad Bamber. I was so allergic it wasn't just the right thing to do it was the only thing to do. I gave him to someone I trusted. I visited him once, and reacted so badly my face swelled up and I couldn't open one of my eyes for several days.

I never saw him again. It broke my heart.

However, he had many happy years with his new family and when he finally passed away they let me know. :(

Over thirty years later, an old friend found a photo of Bamber from 1976, one I'd never seen, and mailed it to me. I cried like a baby when I opened the envelope and saw it.

Life goes on, we do our best by our equine friends, but because we love them, they will always have the power to break our hearts.
 
I know how you feel and it is an absolute personal hell :( Huge hugs x

I sold my first horse as he was too much for me, and I was ok until we were on the road as we were meeting the new owners halfway.

There have been lots of tears and I constantly wondered why I'd done it and why I hadn't had the guts to stick with him. He went to Belfast and I got updates on how he settled, and their first competitions which did make it easier but I hated myself for it.

It took me a couple of years to move on and I can now think of him lovingly and fondly without tears. It was the best decision for both of us but the hurt it caused was immense. It does get easier, and it may also help knowing you have your haffie to concentrate on. x Thinking about you all x
 
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