How do i convince my parents??? Help please

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Kola Bear

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I have part loaned before but at the momet i dont ahve one on loan i just show a shetland and occasionly help out with a friends but my parents know i want a horse on full loan but im not sure how to totally convince them any help would be much appreicated! :confused:;)
 
For a start how about working out exactly what it would cost them both initial set up costs (tack, grooming kit, mucking out kit etc) and weekly / monthly running costs and what you can do to help mitigate the costs? Then work out how much time you can afford to spend looking after it without impacting on your schoolwork. Also you need to show them how you will be able to get to and from where ever you intending to keep it and whether you can do it under your own steam or they will be needing to run you around. Don't forget to factor those costs and time (theirs and yours) in.

That should give you enough to start with.
 
You can't have all the equipment - all horses are different sizes so would require different sized rugs, saddle etc.

If you are moving then you need to find out how much local livery costs are.
 
A loan horse might come with some existing rugs.

You can always consider a part share if the loan option does not convince your parents.

How old are you, surely being out and about occupied with horses, is healthier and much better for you than running around with boys for eg. Think about the pluses, that might convince your parents.
 
Start earning the money you will need when you have a horse and put it in a savings account so that your parents can see you will stick at it....... and get your homework done in the restricted time you will have available. Show them you will be able to cope.:cool:
 
If your parents really aren't prepared to let you have a horse (and they are terribly expensive things -horses, not parents!), then virtually nothing you can say will talk them round. I bet I am not the only person on this forum who BEGGED for a horse throughout their entire childhood, and had to wait until they were an adult before they eventually got one.

However, if you can show them that your schoolwork won't suffer one little bit, that you are prepared to get a Saturday job or something to help contribute to costs (and that this also won't affect your schoolwork), and that you have thought about the most cost-effective way to keep a horse, then you will have done virtually all that you can do. If they really won't go for a full loan, why not look for a share again? Sometimes, shares can expand into a virtual full loan. I started off sharing, jsut doing a couple of evenings a week, and it turned into essentially a full loan, as the mare's owner was horrendously busy with her other horses and was more than happy for me to take her on as my responsibility.
 
Do you have a part time job already? If not, get one and show your parents you are prepared to help pay for your hobby.

Then do as Jemima_too has recommend, put some effort in and write out a comprehive list of costs and a weekly timetable of how school / college work and horse can be combined.

If you want the horse then you're going to have to prove you can / will look after it and you are prepared to put the effort in.
 
jeeve said:
A loan horse might come with some existing rugs.

You can always consider a part share if the loan option does not convince your parents.

How old are you, surely being out and about occupied with horses, is healthier and much better for you than running around with boys for eg. Think about the pluses, that might convince your parents.
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:cool::cool: Im 14 and yeah better than doing notheing! Weve part loaned for the past 3 years just not the right horses or good horses or bad owners that are unreliable ect
 
get a job - paperround etc?

Its really unfair to ask your parents to get you a horse/pay for it etc if you arnt willing to make a smal contribution,,?

I personally would offer help in exchange for riders @ a regular place....
 
I would expect my child to have a little job and be able to provide me with all the details of where they'd keep their pony - what things it would need etc!
 
I would get a job but theres 2 paper rounds in our village 1 to old man and 1 to some college kid! and there not much else in our village! i have my own money which i sell things on ebay all the time usuing parents account so thats an income?
 
To convince my parents to let me have a horse when I was 16 I did loads of things :)

I volunteered at any stables for any amount of time they'd have me to gain experiance handling different types of horses. I ususally got to ride their as well, which meant my riding improved.

I made a little "book" of horsey knowledge, such as illnesses etc, and how to handle an injured horse etc, just stuff that horse owners may face on a daily basis. This helped show that I was dedicated, I didnt just want a horse for the sake of it, I was putting as much effort in as I could to learn about how to be a responsible horse owner.

I priced every thing up, and was able to give them a clear cut figure so they knew how much it would cost them, rather than "umm...around £x's per month"

I didnt whinge/whine/moan, as this would have made my parents mind up for them, it would have been a massive no.

Instead I tried to show I was responisble, willing to learn and knowledgable enough to look after a horse. They are a big responsibility and I can fully understand in hindsight why my parents were reluctant.

After I'd done all of the above, I booked them a lesson each on a schoolmaster to show them exactly why I was passionate about horses (both my parents are non-horsey). Although they don't ride now that lesson did help prove a point, and 2 years later I have four.

Ever since I was earning I contributed as much as I could, I would never expect my parents to fund my hobby.

Good luck, it's worth the wait. I'm so glad I didn't get a horse when I wanted to, I'm so grateful I had to learn and gain experience, which has proved invaluble :)

But, one thing to remember, if your parents say no, please respect that, horses are expensive and very time consuming.
:)
 
Second that One! I very carefully researched everything to do with owning my first pony and put together a little information pack for my parents. I'd researched local yards, spoken to my instructors about what/how much to budget etc and even showed them how much time I'd spend at the yard per day. I saved all my pocket money and bought a bike to get to and from the yard under my own steam. Then I volunteered every evening, weekend and holiday that I could to learn the basic skills required and pick up stable management tips. I saved all money from my birthdays, paper rounds etc and gave it to my parents as a deposit! They were impressed with the dedication I showed to the cause, and also I made a point of showing them how much I'd focus on my schoolwork as well and worked really hard to impress them with my grades!
In short, I didn't really have to try to be seen to be keen - I just was ridiculously focused and it obviously showed.
 
Wow thanks thats really helpful, booked my mum a lesson ages ago on this huge cob it was soooo funny! and dad used to walk next to me when i used to hack out my old part loan tb! and he would take the mic outta me!
 
Tbh I think its best to get your parents involved :)

My dad loves coming up to the yard, and is proving invaluable with my youngster :)

If you are passionate about horses, just let it show like Lowen Ki said just be really focused and prove your point in a mature manner :)

If you want any help with researching stuff let me know, I still have lots of stuff that I used to persuade my parents :)

Plus, if your dad takes the mick out of you, ask if he wants a ride :p that soon shuts my dad up ;)
 
I think your parents are right that they don't want to buy you a horse. Your knowledge about them seems very poor, there's nothing worse for a horse than a teenage girl who has got no clue. Besides do your parents can trust you? Are you sure that after few months you'll still be interested in that horse? I advice you to go to some yard and do some volunteering jobs, like mucking out, brushing etc. Spend time with different horses and learn as much as you can. Obviously keep your school on good level and it would be ideal if you could earn some money
 
Ikarina said:
I think your parents are right that they don't want to buy you a horse. Your knowledge about them seems very poor, there's nothing worse for a horse than a teenage girl who has got no clue. Besides do your parents can trust you? Are you sure that after few months you'll still be interested in that horse? I advice you to go to some yard and do some volunteering jobs, like mucking out, brushing etc. Spend time with different horses and learn as much as you can. Obviously keep your school on good level and it would be ideal if you could earn some money
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I know enough i used to part loan 4 days a week 1 tb and 2 shetlands i do know and ive been riding for 8 years. So dont wrongly accuse me. I had one loan for nearly a year then he moved yards and and my old part loan was due to the onwer taking this mic that we ended it. i know how to muck out, groom, tack up, poo pick ride ect, i was trusted to give a sick pony meds so i cant be that irresponcible
 
Equestriansophie said:
I know enough i used to part loan 4 days a week 1 tb and 2 shetlands i do know and ive been riding for 8 years. So dont wrongly accuse me. I had one loan for nearly a year then he moved yards and and my old part loan was due to the onwer taking this mic that we ended it. i know how to muck out, groom, tack up, poo pick ride ect, i was trusted to give a sick pony meds so i cant be that irresponcible
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Maybe all well and true, but you are only 14.... and at that age there is no way you can 'know everything'. All us on here learn from our horses everyday and come across many new situations. You can read all the books in the universe about horses, but hands on, practical experience teaches much. Common sense is also an asset to have, and that comes with age and experience. Sadly 8 years isn't that long in the grand sceme of things, and thats only riding!
Part loan is a far cry from full loan... can you imagine getting up at dawn every morning, in the p1ssing rain to cycle to the yard to muck out and again after school. In mid winter, freezing cold and you 'have' to ride, poo pick and tack clean... all yours, no one to help and thats 24/7/365? It is a huge comitment.
I am with others, go to your local stables, offer to help out, get rides, and then you are on the ladder to full loaning - show dedication.
 
Im not sure where to get a job tbh lol paper rounds are all gone, not many shops ect cant work in a pub due to age i sell on ebay thats a bit but not a lot! lol will keep an eye out! course i dont know everything!
 
ok hun this is up to you to prove - and thats what it is about - prove you are responsible enough to loan/own a horse. it took me 8 yrs to prove this to my parents to buy me my first pony - i was 14 - i did 3 paperrounds and help at a farm. and im gratefully now - 48 yrs old to be shown how hard it is to own/loan a pony. you have to get out there and get a reliable job and trust me it takes hard work. horses are so exspensive and time consuming. you are coming to an age where school and exams are so so important. I think a part loan is better. or help out at local yards - muck out ragwort anything to get the experience and knowledge needed to have a horse and as you get to know people the chance of a ride . Prove to your parents and btw I think your parents are showing common sense hun. your young the whole of your life ahead of you - use this time to gain as much experience and knowledge and in the future you will reap the rewards - i did :) xx
 
Have you considered that your parents may feel that they don't have the funds for a full loan? They may also not want to commit to going back and forth twice a day every day.

I think that until you can run one on your own you should look to part loan/help at a riding school.

To put it in perspective Ive spent £500+ on vet bills in two months and am expecting it to be around £800+ after her trip to horsepital tomorrow. With a full loan you could be expected to pay the vet bills..
 
you getting a horse on full loan at 14 = your parents getting a horse on full loan. in the face of things, it will be them driving you there twice a day, and it will be the money in their pocket that funds it, be honest! you will surely run out of things to sell on ebay, i wouldn't class it as an income. and knowing that just d.i.y livery can range from £18-25 a week plus food plus hay plus straw plus petrol etc etc etc i will take a huge leap of faith and guess that you would not be selling enough things on ebay to cover these costs!

i can understand why your parents would be reluctant. at 14 i don't think you can legally work anywhere such as a shop/restaurant, most places are a minimum of 16. so unless you can get some work on a farm such as a milk round i don't think you'll have much luck. and untill you are able to contribute financially to YOUR hobby, i'm sure your parents will take a hell of a lot of pursuading!
 
fyi you can work in a pub, you just can't serve alcohol.

i'm 20 and just got my first horse on full loan after helping at a small riding school/livery yard for about 8 years, plus about another 6 or 7 years of riding lessons before that. in return for helping i got to ride, go to competitions to groom for the liveries and i got trained for bhs exams. i learnt a hell of a lot from the youngsters and naughty ponies that came in and all the mistakes i made that i will never make again. that experience was priceless. and i never nagged or whinged about it, but i think my parents refusing to buy me a pony was the best thing they could have done for me. now, i am so glad i took the time to learn so i'm truly ready to have my own horse now. i feel like i've really earned it and i have sound knowledge that will help me cope with the trials and tribulations of horse ownership - although i feel i still do rely quite heavily on my yard owner/instructor because i still know very little in the grand scheme of things. when the horse is seriously ill or injured, you have to make a decision. are you ready for that? i wasn't at 14.

go and make your mistakes at a riding school and i can tell you the experience will be invaluable. a lot of riding schools i know of actually have a loan scheme where riders can pay a small amount towards a horse's keep and that horse will be theirs to look after and ride for a set number of days a week. that's practically a normal share agreement, without the responsibility of having to look after it every day and the worry of what might happen when something goes wrong because there will always be someone there for you.
 
I'm with the people that say get more experience, share or part loan even but a full loan is A LOT to take on. What will you do if there's an emergency, will you know who to call? The vet is very very expensive. To give you an idea i had to pay £120 for my dog to be seen sunday evening because my horse stood on her leg, no break or fracture, just a scrape so a few tablets to prevent infection and a shot of pain killers cost me £120! Thats for a miniature poodle without the call out fee, so imagine what it would cost for a 600pound horse where you can't take it to the vets.
What about your exams? You have GCSE's coming up soon and trust me it is stressful. I'm only 2 years older than you and my friend looks after my horse for me on tuesdays and thursdays so that i have time to revise but i'm finding it hard anyway.
And i'm sure at some point you'll also want to go on holiday, who's looking after your horse then? Can you afford to pay someone to look after it for you while still paying for all the rest? Can you trust that person?
And remember you'll need lessons as well, once in a while, and the show fees, and the transport to and from.
And say you get your own horse, what happens to it when you go to uni/college? I don't think your parents will appriciate being left with a horse to look after. My parents aren't happy that i'm gonna leave my dog with them, not even mentioning the horse.
There's a lot more things to consider than just the day to day basis care and costs. You need insurance and in case of emergency you have to be prepared to pay the excess straight away before you can claim any of it back.
Horses are expensive and time consuming, my parents only said yes as me and my friend share our little herd of 4, they don't have the huge responsibility, they're not horsey, they don't get it why i'll get up at 6am in the rain and go to the yard just to shovel some s*** and come back again to then go to school.
If your parents say no, don't be mad at them, when you're older and earning your own money then you can make the choice for the horses to be a huge part of your life.
I think share or part loan will be good for you. Good luck and be patient!
 
I remember I got my first horse by doing a "business plan" showing it wouldnt cost my parents any money after purchase as I got a horse that was suitable for working livery at a riding school. This meant that I could ride her a couple of days a week but all the costs of feed/livery etc. were paid by the riding school as they used her in lessons and no worries when I went on holiday etc so my non-horsey parents didnt need to worry. She was a 14.3hh Connemara x Welsh Cob so suitable for both kids and adults. Also I never outgrew her so when she went lame I was "forced" to take her away and then I had her all to myself for the next 20 years or so!!! It really worked well. When I was distracted by boys etc. she was being looked after and I didnt need to go and visit her but later on I had her full time.
Best of luck persuading them.
 
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