How do I get my bravery back??

[squirtlysmum]

Help? I really need some views on how I can regain confidence, I am an extremely experienced rider ridden upto medium dressage and jumped affiliated discovery, evented and county showed however I bred a baby ned who is now five and has turned into a firebreathing dragon who knows exactly how to put the frighteners on, we both have quite a lot of baggage to work through as he has had an op for Kissing spine, before people shout he is now normal in respect of his back! His back is regularly treated but he is seriously full of energy and very very agile ( a new found thing after back was mended!!) he is extra sharp and has decided that backwards at great speed is a fun game when he'd excited. If I use a stick on him he simply loses the plot and knaps even more usually ending in leaping around like a lipizzaner so I wear small spurs which do help the knapping problem but he is seriously damaging my confidence.
Selling is not an option and he has been sent away to be rebacked and behaved like an angel and has slowly digressed into a monster, I believe he is going through his teenage years but any confidence hints for me would be gladly accepted.

 

[kerilli]

umm, he sounds like a little toad. i hope he's living out and being fed hay and absolutely nothing else, i'd give him no more energy at all, he doesn't sound as if he needs it! i'm assuming you've tried major voice aids, telling him off when he's naughty and really telling him to WALK ON until he does? with some of them, that's enough.
have you tried having someone on the floor to threaten him with a lunge whip if he runs backwards? what triggers it, is it any old thing, does he just look for trouble? i'd be tempted to lunge him for 20 mins before getting on, knacker him out a bit, and then trot solidly for 20 minutes until he's too tired to argue. sorry if it sounds cruel, but he shouldn't be a little s*** then!
really drastic measures: i knew a very very good horseman who got a mare he couldn't get through to. she was the archbitch from hell, you name it, she did it. eventually he sent her to someone else and she came back quiet as a lamb, never gave any more problems. the old boy who'd had her had given her no water for a day or two or three, then ridden her. not ideal, obviously, and i've never had to do it yet, but it's better than him denting your confidence further etc. or, worse, ending up in a dogmeat can!
sorry if this suggestion causes uproar, but it really is a last case scenario.

 

[Shilasdair]

You have two options - either ride it yourself or get someone else to ride it for you (loan? schooling?).
Using a whip when he's going backwards is too late - he is already behind your leg so will just do a speedier reverse.
For horses that do this, the best advice can often be to do nothing but sit quiet, and wait until he eventually goes forward (this can take a while) then halt him and don't let him.
Then when you (aka 'The Boss'

) is ready to go forward, ride him on.
It'll take a few goes before he gets the message, but it's quite a good long term cure, in my experience.
If you are good at long reining (driven style) then long rein him around and give him a good tap with the whip (from a safe distance obviously) if he stops.
It could also be a lack of confidence so if you have a lead file for him for a while, that might help.
I agree with Kerilli - leave him out 24/7, no hard feed.
S

 

[lizzieuk1]

agree wth shilasdair just sit quiet when he reverses and then once he stops ask him to go on or try making him go back once he starts so you regain control of the situation, he'll soon get bored of the reversing thing. try schooling at home for a while rather than hacking out until he learns whos in charge, don;t let him get away with messing while you school, also i find lunging is great and if you can use a pessoa then that really helps as if they start messing they only fight with themselves and it makes control much easier. he just needs to learn who the boss is and then you should start having an easier time, it is v hard but you will get there, make sure you are consistent with him and don;t let him take charge, stay in the school/field or on the lunge until he's behaving properly then try hacking.

 

[BethH]

I went through napping with Ryan when we re-backed him, once they have experienced pain like KS, they tend to be very spooky at everything and it takes a long time for them to build confidence, he is young and green and used to being in pain so from his point of view he is reacting as a horse would if it feels insecure and scared.

Personally I'd lose the spurs and whip as in my view a horse with KS tends to fight back and the whole sitution goes downhill rapidly. Try to get him standing still and wait it out until he gets bored and goes forward as shilasdar suggests, this has been the best long term solution for Ryan. One tip is that if he is napping, if you turn him around and he reverses he'll soon be past the object he is scared off and then turn him again and off you go. If he tries to rear when you do it get your weight really far back and then use your whole leg to aid him and hold him together rather than your heels so he can feel you are with him, the further your weight is back the more transfers to his hocks which makes them feel more secure as he knows he is set up to be able to escape if that makes sense.

This problem is something that will take some time to work through, I agree that having someone walk on the ground with you or a good safe lead horse would be great but I did have to tackle Ryan hacking out alone and it was probably the hardest thing I've ever had to do. I just kept it short and gradually extended the time out. I kept repeating the same routes and going a little further each time and set goals i.e., the end of the path or across the river etc etc for my own confidence as well as his. You have to win this one but do it really quietly. I completely agree about the long reining but without the whip and have you walked him out in hand??? If you want to ask me any questions am happy for you to pm so I can give you some other ideas for the school and hacking out if it helps.

 

[TarrSteps]

Going with Shilasdair and Beth on this one. It is true that sometimes you can "shock" a naughty horse into going forward with well timed use of the stick but as Shilasdair said, if you misudge the situation or get it wrong it will simply make the situation worse. And don't feed him to be a pill or to be feeling so good he doesn't know what to do with himself.

He needs to learn to move off your leg, plain and simple. All the time. Without question. When you put your leg on lightly he marches, without spurs and without any sort of lag or questioning. You need to MAKE SURE this is the case, first in non-threatening situations and then in gradually more testing ones. If you think he's responsive and obedient now then he has to be more so and in more situations, working up to the ones that cause the most problem.

If he's forward going and goes without the leg you are in just as much trouble - he goes only when asked and only as much as asked. Having a horse that doesn't go when you ask is just as out of control as having one that goes when you don't ask, although it's never seen as being as dangerous for some reason.

As far as your confidence, being out of control is scary at the most base level. You're not worrying foolishly, you're genuinely anxious in a threatening situation. It's all very well trying to "fix" your confidence but fixing the training issue is the real key. It's sensible to be scared in a scary situation so you need to use education and active problem solving to restore your control, not just tell yourself to "buck up."

Is there anyone more experienced in this sort of thing who can work with you and your horse at home? Perhaps ride him through some of his episodes so you can watch and give you customised instruction about how to deal with him? I realise you are an experience, competant rider but perhaps you need some specialised advice in this situation. It's all well and good to ask for help on the internet but it's impossible to really assess these things without seeing them and it's very easy to get the "wrong" advice that was right for someone else.

 

[harrihjc]

I'm sorry you're having problems with William, I was wondering only yesterday how you are getting on and thinking I should pop down and see you all. It's horrible when you lose your confidence. Can any of the others at the yard help you? I'd be happy to come up if you want someone on the ground. Not really sure what to suggest that hasn't already been suggested, but can relate to the 5yr old temper tantrums!!

 

[LusoLover]

My boy went through a stage of only going backwards and still does on occassion. With him the answer is to drop my reins, literally through them at him, so that he has absolutley nothing to run back from. It may sound daft but I learnt to adopt an attitude of 'whatever / what was the point of that' rather than anger, so that it all becomes a bit pointless for him to run back. Hope that made sense.

There may be an element of him being like a 16 year old teenager, thinking that he is the bg I am. My boy definitely went through this for about 18 months. Lots of lunging will help to establish who's boss.

I can completely empathise as I have shed many tears of frustration with my boy. Get as much help as you can, a) to fix the problem, and b) to help keep you positive. It's hard to keep going sometimes, but it will be worth it. My boy is now a real sweetheart (most of the time) and our bond is a lot stronger for going through his 'growing pains'.