How do you convince daughter she needs another horse!!

[rockinghorse]

OK, I am not a competive or pushy mum but my daughter has had her 14h pony for three years (he's only 9yrs old) she's just turned 14 and 5' tall weighs 8 stone wet! He hadn't done much when we got him so they have learnt together, he's done pc , games, hunted, sj, xc, hacks out alone etc and given her loads of confidence but now really needs to move on to the next one but she doesn't want to know. Each time we go out, other horsey mums & her instructors are telling me & her she needs to move onto something bigger & more forward going. I guess I am starting to feel pressurised from the pc. I have printed off loads of adverts for her & left them lying around the house. She admits that she would like another more forward going mount and does get frustrated with him,but I agree I don't want her to over horse herself so perhaps a full up 14'2 rather than 15'2. Shall I just retire & leave it up to her?????

 

[Natch]

If she's happy and he is, leave 'em to it!

 

[itsme123]

Over horsing a child is a recipie for disaster.

Just be pleased she has a pony that will last her for years yet and she is happy with. At 5ft a 14hh pony is perfectly fine! I'm 5'6 and at 9 stone was riding 12.3hh / 13.2hh ponies and was fine.


That's what i don't like about PC, the constant pressure...

 

[dsophiea]

if she's happy i would leave her be, who knows you may sell her 'perfect' pony and may never be able to replace him, im sure the time will come when she feels enough is enough with her 14hh pony. i would be gutted if my mum told me she wanted me to move on to horses.

 

[SpruceRI]

This is so unusual to read as it's usually the other way round !!!

But your daughter no doubt adores her pony and can't bear the thought of seeing him go. Plus she's done all the hard work with him and is now reaping the benefits.

At her height, weight and age she's not too heavy, tall or old to be riding a 14hh pony....well, you're never too old!!

Personally I'd leave it upto her to decide what she wants to do, and tell the PC to sod off too.
He's her pony, let her enjoy him, that's what I'd do.

 

[Bess]

If she's happy with the pony and not too big for it couldn't you look at how its kept, keep it in overnight and how its fed and maybe give it something more in its hard feed for more oomph?

 

[YorksG]

I bought my 15:3 Appy mare from a 14 year old girl who had had her for 6 months. The mare is not a novice ride, as she can be very spooky and would be bolshy if she was allowed to be. The girl we bought her from was about 5' tall and probably weighed a little less than your daughter. She went on to buy a 14hh Conemarax. If your daughter ends up with a horse that is too forward going for her you run the risk of her giving up horses altogether and becoming far more interested in boys

 

[Fleur100]

She's only 14 & needs to be having fun & if she competes she needs to be competing with other kids. Don't let the PC & others pressurise you. Ponies really are more fun. Just look at how many adults compete M&Ms.

 

[rockinghorse]

Actually thats a very good point cos he is such a good doer normally only on high fi light & slim & healthy maybe some oats or competition mix this winter for hunting!! He is Dartmoor / NF cross so quite steady but also don't want her or me to be sat in A & E on a saturday afternoon. He has a lot of stamina & is competive racing against other's but when he's asked to do HT or XC he does tend to amble around the course at his own pace! LOL

 

[buffy2]

I was 21,when i brought my 14hh pony,and im 5ftish and not sure what i weighed at the time,only retired her because of her old age,would be still riding her now,

 

[toffeesmarty]

Please let your daughter do what she wants to do and don't let the PC force you/her into dong something until she's ready.
A friend's daughters isn't allowed to ride in the senior group of her PC (she's 11) cos pony is only 12.2hh. She was told by the DC that they 'won't be able to keep up with the bigger ponies'. At last rally they made her sit out after 20 mins so as not to 'tire' pony out and 'get in the way of the bigger ones'.
She isn't underhorsed and I think it's really sad.

 

[rockinghorse]

He is kept out in summer (what summer I hear you ask) but we do stable him throughout winter, although with the weather recently he has had a few premature nights in which he loves. I think the feeding might be the answer and yes the pressurising bit about PC does feel a bit heavy at times. Pleased to hear this is not an isolated case.

 

[Natch]

She'll also probably learn more getting a laid back horse going forwards than by trying to woah a fizzy one.

PC mothers can be so b1tchy, or are you sure one of them hasn't got their eye on him for their own kid and wants you to sell him?!

I'll second Fleur's comments about adults riding M&Ms - ponies are definately more fun as far as I'm concerned!!

(fleur BTW - who is that gorgeous creature in your avatar?)

 

[Tia]

I know you say you're not, but you do sound like you are

. Perhaps your daughter thinks so too?

My daughter has just turned 12 and she has a 12.2hh pony which she has had since she was 1 year old. She does have other larger ponies which she competes but to be perfectly honest she does this as my little partner in my selling business and gets paid for doing it. These larger ponies/small horses are not here to stay, they are simply brought on, competed and then sold. Her little 12.2hh remains here and always will do. She is still ridden a number of times every week and is going nowhere. I know fine well that no other pony she has ever had the ride on will ever compare to her little 12.2hh.

I would imagine if your daughter wanted to change her pony then she would mention it to you? And would harp on to you? Rather than the other way around surely?

 

[Tia]

Well that's disgusting behaviour and I think you should tell your friend to make a formal complaint!

Gosh, interesting to see that the Pony Club has never changed over the years

.

 

[Natch]

[ QUOTE ]
A friend's daughters isn't allowed to ride in the senior group of her PC (she's 11) cos pony is only 12.2hh. She was told by the DC that they 'won't be able to keep up with the bigger ponies'. At last rally they made her sit out after 20 mins so as not to 'tire' pony out and 'get in the way of the bigger ones'.

[/ QUOTE ]

When I used to go on beach hacks every week it was ALWAYS the 12.2s and 13hhs who beat us on the big 'uns in the races! And I seem to recall having to trot to catch up with the instructor who often led the ride on the dinkiest pone ever!

 

[toffeesmarty]

Thanks for this - I thought it was just me.
Thankfully my daughter doesn't want to join the PC. She is very happy in the show ring riding ponies of 13hh and under - which are the right height for her age in county classes but would be too small for the local PC.

 

[Smash]

[ QUOTE ]
OK, I am not a competive or pushy mum

[/ QUOTE ]

You do an awfully good impression of one.

If she is happy as she is, then leave it alone. The PC may be pushy, but you're the parent here so start backing up your daughter - it's her opinion that matters here, not theirs.

 

[Ravenwood]

Why put yourself through the expense and hassle of finding a new pony (and selling loved pony) when there is no need?

If your daughter is happy with the pony she has, leave it at that. You could go out and buy a super dooper, win all, PC pony and your daughter may not bond with it and give up.

Let sleeping dogs lie - is my advice

 

[Ottinmeg]

what is it with the pony club eh ? Just ignore them and don't let them pressurise either of you into buying something else if you are both perfectly happy with what you've already got. the phrase, if it aint broke, don't fix it springs to mind. I don't think your being pushy either as the constant pressure to do something you don't want to will wear you down eventually. As others have said tell the pc to sod off! Just for the record my daughter is 14 and a little over 5ft weighs a lot more than your daughter and rides a 13.3hh welsh monkey, my 5ft 8 beanpole often rides her as well.

 

[PeterNatt]

Your daughters pony sounds like one in a million. There are far too many over-horsed children that go off horse riding.

If your daughter is enjoying her pony then let her keep it and continue enjoying it. After all the pony could continue to be ridden by her for at least another 20 years!

 

[angiebaby]

I'm just about to go and fetch my daughters 12.3h NF pony back from his loan home, because she misses him like mad, and she doesn't want to ride anything else.

She's 5ft 3 , 19!! and about to start Uni!

 

[daisycrazy]

Pony Club used to have a problem with me because they always reckoned my horses were too big (16.2 - 17.0 once I was 13). I was always happy though so merrily ignored them.

I was very fortunate that my mum would buy me my next pony/horse before selling the previous one, sometimes keeping them both for six months or more. It made the transition a lot easier and stopped me feeling so desperately upset when the "old" one waltzed off to a nice new home.

If your daughter is happy with her current pony then you should probably let her get on with it. You could ask her, though, if she would be interested in you buying her a second, slightly bigger (14.2 - 15.0?), pony for her to ride over the winter or next summer to see how she feels. If she likes the idea then great and if not then let her carry on enjoying her current pony for as long as she wants to. The opinions of the Pony Club are not the be all and end all, by any stretch of the imagination.

 

[MillionDollar]

Why? My sister is 19, 5'3" and 9 stone and her main 'horse' is still her first pony, a 13.2 NF mare who is now 16. She loves her and enjoys her............thats all that matters.

 

[Magicmillbrook]

I would leave it to her. Even when my daughter decided she wanted to move up to horses the wrench was enormous, and very nearly put her off riding altogether. Suffice to say, at 17 years old she is back to riding her old faithull 14.2.

 

[Smash]

If you're that desperate to spend money on a horse you can buy me one.

 

[reddie]

I would definitely leave it up to your daughter. She sounds like she's enjoying her pony. She's only 14 and you don't want to be pushing into something because all that will happen is that she could lose her horsey interests. She's coming up to that difficult age. My 16 year old loved her 14.1 pony to pieces but grew too big and never liked horses preferring Lads!!