How honest are you with your husband/partner with what you spend

£30 for a bath!!!!!!!!


I know - I was thinking that!

I don't need to hide stuff or cover up 'real prices' as he probably knows and for bigger things I ask out of courtesy. When he starts caring or minding, then I might have a problem!

He has a large number of project cars, so can't really say too much...
 
My son has just bought a clydie/TB cross, and we have not told OH yet, but last night when I was talking to the middle son about starting to ride the older sons pony, (because it would be good for him to ride another pony), my OH said, "I suppose older son will be wanting to save up and buy a horse now he is working", and I said "probably".:)
 
totally and utterlly honest as my lovely fella (mmmmmmmm) knows what my little mare means to me, he never begrudges pulls a face just smiles- he fell in love with me cause of my passion of horses and my pure love of my mare. he is just the best :) but he also as his toys lol but best thing is when he says " your passion for horses makes you sparkle and shine" jesus i love my fella :) xx
 
My OH is as horsey as I am so he knows exactly what it all costs, but even if he didn't I would never dream of lying to him. As long as out bills are covered we spend our hard earned money on whatever we like.
He has just told me he wants a new squash raquet, I have just told him I want a new matchy set....... ;-)
 
Hmmmm, how far will you take it though?
I know one woman who started off sneaking little toys for the kids etc into the house and then when questioned, "oh, they've had them for months." etc and managed to end up in debt. Because the husband didn't know about all of these, she couldn't tell him and she ended up having to try to get herself out of debt (talking over 10k) because she would hide all of the bills that came in etc. They were going on holiday a few times a year and if she'd asked, could have been out of debt quickly but because he didn't know....

To me, I pride myself on being open and honest with my partner. He helps with ponies if I'm ill etc although totally unhorsey himself. He is the one that buys most of the ponies stuff as he is near the shops more often than I am.
I have an account kept aside and put x amount in a month - same as another poster said - I added all basic stuff up over a year - divided into x months and so much money goes to ponies account. Because I rounded it up, it ends up having £500 a year left over.
I pay my share of bills and also do all housework etc. OH has golf and his business. It was him that encouraged me to find a companion for my first beasty!

Whatever works for each relationship.
 
I earn my own money and I pay all my share of bills and we make an equal contribution to our joint savings, why should it concern him about where the rest of my money goes? I sure don't spend time wondering how much his various collections cost him!
I tend to just get what I need/want and there's no need to hide it(though if he's having a tight week I don't tend to parade it out for him to see just because it makes me feel a little guilty, even though he spent all his money too soon and it's not really my fault). I'm sure one day we will have a mortgage and other expenses and the amount we both spend on our hobbies will have to be cut back, but I'm fairly confident I will have bought everything I could possibly need by then!
 
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Pretty much Yes, He knows cost of feed/livery/shoes/insurance the basics, its like his van (the way I look at it) running costs, However he said he is getting on first name basis with the postman as I order tack and so on mostly from ebay (always like a bargin) This he says he does not want to know. Bless..
 
only on the odd occassion will i say a white lie and that's normally when i've bought something that i didn't need as such, more of a treat for the horses. even then i say it's only a few quid cheaper than what i paid, or failing that i don't tell him i bought anything and he doesn't really notice!
most of the time though he is the one who will go to the shops and buy whatever i need for them, he knows i will only buy what is needed as a rule and also the cheapest i can get away with so he doesn't worry about my spending on the horses.
 
He is very aware of how much it all costs.

The only time I did pull the wool over his eyes was when I was kitting Vardi out in a western saddle, saddle pad, cinch, bridle, split reins etc etc etc and he was going to pay as I was waiting for my tax rebate.

Everyone at the yard pulled a superb flanker by sucking their teeth and going "ohhh at least 2.5k for a good second hand saddle and all the other bits" when the final tally came in at a little under 1.5k he as ecstatic! (the amount was exactly as we had all excepted in the first place:-)
 
my dad knows all the livery costs etc, however sometimes we have spread out telling him a vets bill or something if he is having a bad week at work. I have paid off some vets bills (bute) so she didnt have to tell him about the vets bill/farrier and also bute bill in the same week!! Although he always knows the true costs eventually and would never begrudge paying, he is the one who wanted to rescue a horse that was being put down with his friend because he thought it was unfair as that horse was sound.
My OH doesnt really mind what i spend, although i only spend money on what i want rather than livery etc, but he wouldnt mind aslong as i was happy and we could still go out for meals etc.
 
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We have joint accounts and he does all the budgeting etc so not a penny goes on anything without him knowing. He's actually really good about horse expenses, especially as we run a livery yard and so all my expenses get bundled in with that. The only thing that irks me is that I would love to have lessons again (I haven't had any for 7 years). I teach others but would really like a trainer for me too as I must be falling into bad habits by now! But hubby can't see the point and so would definitely not agree to any. In his eyes I'm the best rider you can get :rolleyes: But he is not horsey at all so doesn't realise that we are learning all the time!
 
Fortunately I pay for the horses and him indoors doesn't have a clue how much they cost! Not that he'd mind, he knows some things are just far more important than money.
 
I always tell
, and my partner offers
To pay half
But we both have our hobbies
I have horses , he has boats
So it kind of
Equals it out
 
Joint account his money but he never looks at bank statements so I don't tell unless he finds a receipt or opens a vet bill.

If he knew he'd tell me to sell them all and they are my sanity ;)

I do all the accounts and budgeting so I make sure no-one goes without.
 
Pretty honest, we have joint accounts so he'd know anyway! Also some days I get him to stop off for feed/haylage etc! Luckily he doesn't mind! He has his cars, I have my horses!
 
This thread has proved to be very interesting, having read all your replies it has transpired that most of you are very honest with your partner/husband whilst a few might not reveal the true cost of keeping a horse simply because they haven't been asked by their spouses.

Then there are are few on here (myself included) that have openly lied about the true cost of things whether it be a new bridle or the general cost of livery.

I never lie about anything else in our relationship only about my horse and I think the main reason I do this from time to time is to soften the blow on how much things cost because I am sure he would have a coronary (so I am saving him from himself) lol. Seriously, I love him to bits and he does so much for me but, even I wince sometimes at how much all things equine cost so not revealing the true cost bodes for a harmonious relationship.

Btw, £30 I paid for a bath which sounds extravagant was money well spent. My big fat hairy cob was being prepared for a show, his bath took 41/2 hours, 5 washes (equine jet wash) all his hairy bits washed, groomed, taped up ready for next day. He looked stunning and won first in the Vanner class, came second for well turned out & confirmation classes :) and for any of you that are remotely interested I didn't lie about this expense because he didn't ask :D
 
In my experience, it is those who crow the most about how wonderful and honest their relationships are that are the most likely to split up. Usually on a parr with those who constantly slag off their spouse. Best thing I think is to find a happy medium.
 
My OH is worse than me!! :D he's the splurger and I'm the make-doer! I was very happy getting Clover a nice quality second hand leather saddle but he put his foot down and bought her a gorgeous ALbion barely a year old! I went to the yard a few days after her arrival to find he'd bought a new wheelbarrow (un-needed) and all singing all dancing fork! lol I however get everything second hand or try to get deals etc!!
 
I'm pretty truthful with him if he asks, why would I lie? Also for big purchases I shop around and I'm usually pretty proud that I've got a good deal so like to inform him.

Wagtail, my OH is amazing ;) he cleans, he washes up, he does laundry, he's affectionate, he's also shockingly good looking and we rarely ever argue... dear god we must be doomed by your standards! :D

Oooh actually, I'm not sure I told him how much my Brogini boots were, BUT I did get them with a bonus from a previous job so that's ok right?! :D
 
I do the house accounts so I am totally honest with me lol......Hubby just goes to work and throws his payslip on the table each month...he knows 5 ponies aren't cheap!!
 
I was one of the first to comment on this thread and i have to say for those of you who are totally honest then thats really good and your lucky your partners are understanding......however i agree with most people on the masking the truth, it;s not lying its just not telling them. If my OH asked i would tell him but he doesn't so there's no need to say anything and i know he would moan like hell if he knew.
 
If he asks i tell but he knows the cost of everything and dont hide what i buy, i work fulltime so dont have to justify spending money on who i class as my bestfriend!
 
He knows how much day to day costs such as livery,feed,shoes insurance etc cost. I don't tell him if I buy a new rug/numnah etc but he always notices! I try to tell him I've had it ages but that didn't work lol! Luckily he believed me when I said my new nu
 
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