HOW LONG TO GET OVER IT ????

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ace123

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I very sadly lost my lovely boy about 4 months ago, I had to take a week off work cos i couldn't stop crying, eyes like sand paper and pains in my chest. I still cry on a regular basis, everyone that new him is sooo nice and listen to me going on about him. Today i walked for miles while my daughter rode her pony and wished i was riding to. I've riden a friends horse and my daughters pony but its not the same. I know i will never be able to replace him and at the moment can't be bothered to look. I don't think anything will measure up to him. Does the hurt ever go away..
 
Of course the pain reduces in time. There will be other horses, of course none will be a replacement, they will simply be different - sounds like whatever you find in the future will have a big set of shoes to fill.

The key to moving on is always to remember the best times as a positive, and focus less on the loss.
 
It does get easier with time, I was a wreak when I lost Hector, but having Jerry to focus on really helped me get over it, I still miss him but I think Jerry will become someone just as special in time. (although I know there will never be a horse quite like Hector)
 
I lost a horse 4 years ago to a traffic accident when someone else took him out that wasn't supposed to, i still get really sad about him and terribly upset. The best i found was to set about a new project with a new horse (bought or borrowed) and look for the good things about them. Try not to think about measuring up to him, nothing will replace him, but others are just as good in their own ways. I always have a really nice photo of mine which makes me smile (albeit a watery one) when I look at it....(geesh I'm teary now......!)

*****good vibes*****

xx
 
You never get over it but it does get easier with time. I lost my old boy last boxing day. He was 21 yrs old and i had him since a 5 yr old and having gone up the eventing ladder from novice to advanced i owe him so much. I have 2 fantastic youngsters now but i will never forget him and i still think of him every day. I planted a rose bush in his memory and its right by my stables and menage and his ashes are buried under it so he is still there in a way. I hope this helps you with missing your old boy. xxx
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So sorry to read this and yes it is very very hard, but as the others have said, time does lessen the pain and heartache. For some people the best thing is to put all their efforts into a new horse, others can't face the thought of having another as they see it as replacing the old horse....that honestly doesn't happen. These special horses can never be replaced; but you can find a lovely relationship with another.

Hope it becomes easier for you in time.
Tia x
 
Thanks for your replies. I know what you all say is true and i would give the same advise to others, but when its you and your horse it doesn't seem to work. He was only 11 and was well up until a month before he was pts so all abit quick. thanks again x
 
I don't think you ever get over it, but you do start to live with it. I lost my lovely mare 2 years ago and still look at her memories book and videos on a regular basis. There's no time limit on grief, allow yourself to heal and you will be able to move on.
 
I know I didn't/don't have much sypamthy for other people because the chip in my shoulder but I thought I might share my story with you....You must be positive and something good must come out of yours and mine expeirence. Please never try to 'replace' him but when the time is right you'll know to start looking for a new horse. Four months on and the chip in my shoulder is still huge but I have a little yearling who never fails to put a smile on my face. That something positivie happening is so important to moving on.
http://www.horseandhound.co.uk/forums/sh...rue#Post2304710
 
So sorry you lost your horse
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I lost my boy almost exactly 6 months ago to twisted gut colic. It was very unexpected and I lost him within hours. I still cry my eyes out over it, and I think if you're horse was special to you then you don't quite ever get over it. I thought J was my forever horse and it feels wrong that he's not with me now.
 
I am so sorry to hear about your loss and I understand the pain you are going through. In time the pain will ease, you will never forget that hosre and never replace it, and non will live up to it, but a new horse will bring you a new focus and, believe it or not, a new love will grow.
Take care
 
yes, eventually it does. honestly. i think the sooner you start looking, and hopefully find another horse, the better, tbh. nothing will replace him, but it will divert your attention and give you another horse to love and to make great memories with.
 
very sorry to hear this. It does get easier but yes it will always play on your heart strings and always be emotional for you, you just learn to cope with it better and remember the good times.
I used to ride my best friends horse for her when I was younger and she unfortunately got grass sickness. Not only was the horse difficult to ride but a total pain in the bum. I loved riding her and she was always eventful which I throughly loved. She would play up, buck, bolt and be insane at times but she never once did it nasty, always playful.
I never forget her being loaded into the lorry and she was so fearful about where she was going, as if she knew....she was so patient and caring it was so upsetting. Took me months to pull myself together and it wasnt even my horse.
Tough times for you at the moment but take one step at a time. Its no good thinking about whats going to happen tomorrow if you cant get through the end of the day first...
chin up and think of the good times and smile.
 
Sorry to hear of your loss!.To be honest the pain never really goes properly but it does over time fade!.But the hurt you feel now will in time be replaced with such happy memories.I lost my old girl a few years ago now but sometimes i will sit and chuckle to myself about the times and trouble we got our selves into and the amount of times the old cow dumped me!.Then sometimes if i'm feeling abit down i will still have a little cry.They get into your heart and never leave it whether the horse is here or not,whether it has been one year or twenty.
 
It's a terrible thing, to lose your best friend. So sorry to hear you are hurting deeply. My honest advice is go and look for another. I don't believe you'd be timewasting, just putting feelers out. You never know, another best friend might be just around the corner waiting or you to find them! I do hope the pain eases soon - and cry as much and as long as you like.
 
I lost my horse 5 years ago suddenly to colic that was un-expected. It broke my heart and I can understand the grief you feel. I was so unconsolable that my poor OH could not cope so started looking for horses for me himself and dragged me out looking at them. I felt cold, guilty and disinterested until a work colleague of his pointed out an advert in H&H for a Welshie. He sent off for pictures from the owner and he was beautiful with a cheeky look about him...it was enough for me to want to see him...even though we had to travel from Derbys to Llandudno! I tried him in the school and had great fun and then hacked him out and he made me laugh so much with his funny ways and greeness that I came back in hysterics...that felt so good after all the pain and grief.
I have had him for 5 years now and he is the love of my life...I will never forget my previous baby but my Welshie is the best thing ever.
I hope you have a happy story to tell soon. Take care.
 
I lost my grade A 5 years ago to twisted gut colic. I still get upset now when I think of him, he was such a wonderful horse. For months afterwards I was a wreck, but fortunately I had another horse to focus on which helped to make me feel better. It does get easier to deal with but you never forget them.
 
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