How to cope wth yard bitchiness/those who dont do their bit....

georgiegirl

georgiegirl

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Dont get me wrong, I know it happens on every yard and I love my current yard to bits due to the hacking and the facilities we have.

That said during the past year or two it has changed. We now have a few people who wont keep up with keeping it the way is should be ie clean and tidy etc alongside the people who like to gossip/bitch/play the green eyed monster.

The YO is very unhorsey and leaves us all to get on with it (which in a way is a huge advantage) but at other times this makes life difficult....

so.... how would you deal with a yard like this? There is no option to move as there are no yards in the area which are as nice facility wise etc. So far, whenever someone has come up to me trying to start a bitchy conversation I tell them im not interested which seems to shut them up but at the same time I would like those who are may be not quite so considerate to others to wake up and smell the coffee.....

I know it happens everywhere but does anyone have some hints/tips/ morsels of advice?

thankyou
 
georgiegirl said:
Dont get me wrong, I know it happens on every yard and I love my current yard to bits due to the hacking and the facilities we have.

That said during the past year or two it has changed. We now have a few people who wont keep up with keeping it the way is should be ie clean and tidy etc alongside the people who like to gossip/bitch/play the green eyed monster.

The YO is very unhorsey and leaves us all to get on with it (which in a way is a huge advantage) but at other times this makes life difficult....

so.... how would you deal with a yard like this? There is no option to move as there are no yards in the area which are as nice facility wise etc. So far, whenever someone has come up to me trying to start a bitchy conversation I tell them im not interested which seems to shut them up but at the same time I would like those who are may be not quite so considerate to others to wake up and smell the coffee.....

I know it happens everywhere but does anyone have some hints/tips/ morsels of advice?

thankyou
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Buy an Ipod, so you don't need to talk to any of them :) Just stay completely out of it, don't worry about trying to make other people see the error of their ways, unless it immediately effects you I'd try and lay low. There's nothing worse than a herd of mean horsey people, so whilst you're not their target, I'd keep my head down! :D
 
Agree with the above for gossip etc. Earphones work a treat.

If not pulling weight on things that need to be done, then that's a YOs problem. As long as not affecting the horses I'd not care too much, but have a word with YO if in contract that you seem to be picking up others slack and then I'd sweep outside my stable and keep my area very tidy and when YO gets fed up of place in a state they will sort it.
What are the stable blocks like? If split a bit see if the lot who get on can all be in one area?
If a big issue I'd gently point out how much more it must cost emptying muck heap when people don't fork up etc.
 
horsesatemymoney said:
Buy an Ipod, so you don't need to talk to any of them :) Just stay completely out of it, don't worry about trying to make other people see the error of their ways, unless it immediately effects you I'd try and lay low. There's nothing worse than a herd of mean horsey people, so whilst you're not their target, I'd keep my head down! :D
Click to expand...

Very good advice!:)
 
Don't worry about it.
Be like Switzerland and stay neutral. Nothing worse than getting bogged down with other people's drama.
Headphones work well or even try saying to the people something like, "I am more than happy to have a chat however please don't make any nasty comments about people to me as I would rather not hear them."
 
The fact is you can't control what other people are like. The sooner you accept this and let it go the better it will be for you mentally. Just make a conscious decision not to get wound up about it.

Also though there is always a bit of idle chit chat on yards - I wouldn't always call it bitchy just human nature but if you do talk to people rather than dismiss them you might influence them in a good way? :)
 
I am very sensitive, and this can really get to me if I let it - but I now "do my own horse and keep out of things" , and feel so much better for it.

the key is to keep your head down, not say too much, say "thanks" for unwanted advice and ignore (that used to drive me crazy), and keep your stable and outside it as clean as you want to. I make a point of stacking the muck heap and sweeping up hay etc.

Then, you have done your bit, and they can get on with it. Oh, and make sure your stuff isn't used ! One yard I was at, the YO would poo pick my barrow so full I couldn't move it, and just leave it there - for me to empty. Or do the same with mucking out. It used to really upset me, as I have a bad back anyway.

I'm lucky now that I feel very safe on the yard I'm at now, with a very good YO, and nice liveries.
 
It's about give and take some people like to gossip some dont so if you don't don't leave them to it but you can't stop it happening .
Some people are tidier than others now this is a harder one and I am afraid you can't impose your standards on others so it's about give and take those who are untidy have to do a bit more than is natural for them and you as the tidy end of the scale have to accept things not being quite as you would like them.
 
We have the yard supergossip who loves to make up stories as she is a bored old woman!

I am not a fan of people generally, so I choose the quieter times to go to the yard where not many folk are about. Sometimes I cant help but be there at peak times, so it is head down, enjoy my horse and toddle off home again.

I don't get involved in any bitching and let the bitchy people crack on with each other. I chat to a few folk who I know are neutral and we chat about anything else other than ponies generally.

I do sometimes wonder about moving as in Winter I don't like loads of people in one space due to the above, but as you said my facilities are excellent and to have facilities means being on a big yard, so as much as I would like quiet, I would forego facilities (in my area). And therefore I think if I moved I would exchange one lot of people for another, so no mileage in it. I did post about thieves and that made me consider moving, but again, nothing a good padlock cant sort.

As for tidiness, that is down to people and unless YO enforces it, not sure what can be done there.
 
Shysmum... We had a pony who was very good at tipping over barrows left like this.... Was done on more than one occassion 'accidentally' outside the persons stable.
 
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