How to decide if it’s the right horse?

Assuming the horse already ticks all the boxes, then yes, gut instinct. You'll face challenges with any horse so you need a bit of that pure je ne sais quoi to get you through the trying times.

I did buy my current horse without that gut feeling because he seemed like a really good fit. But he wasn't really -- at least not right off the bat -- and it took us a good year to develop the relationship. Now I wouldn't trade him for the world but there were definitely a few moments where I thought I made a mistake!

Horses aren't exactly flying off the shelves like they were during covid so don't be afraid to ask for a second viewing.
 
When I was horse shopping for Charlie, I'd been looking for 14 months and had a really bad time, ending up in A&E twice (through no fault of my own). I really liked him and felt 95% happy on him and thought that was enough. After 2 years, it didn't work out and I was searching again. I dreaded it but Wiggy was the first horse I saw. I knew within 30 seconds of my backside hitting the saddle, the next 30 mins I was on him just kept getting better. I had a very slight wobble simply because he was the first one I'd seen and I couldn't believe it could be this easy but I had a much bigger part of me thinking it was fate. I still think that. :)
 
I'm clearly not very good at this as we thought we had the perfect horse twice, then to have issues over a year later or in the current case, 8 months later! Probably not so easy when it comes to kids...we even view several times, hack out, got a more experienced person to ride etc...fly through vettings...

I wish I was better at it and I've been around horses for a long time!
 
Trakky14 said:
I'm clearly not very good at this as we thought we had the perfect horse twice, then to have issues over a year later or in the current case, 8 months later! Probably not so easy when it comes to kids...we even view several times, hack out, got a more experienced person to ride etc...fly through vettings...

I wish I was better at it and I've been around horses for a long time!
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I wouldn't think that would be your fault, no one could foresee issues arising so far down the line! Sounds like you just had some very bad luck.
 
I had a very strict list of must haves/must nots.

I would not view anything that was outside of those guidelines. (Mainly involving being safe enough for a tall gangly child who’d lost their confidence, big enough for mum to ride too). However, somethings I was flexible on- eg breed/sex/looking like the back end of a bus.

I then googled/stalked the life out of the potential seller (it helped that i bought my boy off Facebook before they clamped down on horse sales). I stalked her YouTube too. He had been a first PC pony and that was the job he was being bought for. I saw all the videos and photos of silly stuff teens do with ponies (bareback gymkhana games, jumping a single bucket, falling off sideways because you’re laughing too much, etc) as well as the polished videos for sale I then called the DC of her PC for a reference/to collaborate what I’d been told.

So before we’d even got to the viewing I knew that in theory he should fit the bill.

At the viewing he was very sweet, I felt safe on him. My son felt safe on him (and actually jumped a x pole which was a big deal for him). He was very nice… but I wasn’t sure if he was ‘the one’.

I was a bit worried he was a bit too quiet/chilled out and did we want more ooomph? (Obviously, that was a very daft question baring in mind why we were buying him 🤦‍♀️!!!) As other posters have said, buy the horse you can ride and feel safe on today… not the one you think you could ride in 6m…

I talked it over on the drive home, and called them that evening to say yes please. I figured that even if, in a year so, my son wanted to do more and needed a step up, that time spent gaining confidence now wouldn’t be wasted, and that a polite, safe and sensible pony that a novice child/small adult could ride wouldn’t be difficult to sell.

Best decision I’ve ever made. We’re still very happy together more than 10 years later and he’s never going anywhere.
 
With my latest project, I used my head to get to the point where I was prepared to drive 3 hours to see him in person, and he looked like what I was expecting as he was brought in to view, so still head at this point, but when I put my hand on his neck under his mane and he turned his head to look at me, I felt such a vivid connection it was 100% heart at that point. It was so spooky!
Edited to add he was unbacked and a bit feral at this point, so there wasn't much else to go on!
 
If you drive away wondering ‘is this the one?’ It isn’t. The right one you know.

I’ve brought loads to sell and that’s easy, you just them to tick all the boxes. The keep ones have to make your heart sing.

My horse of a lifetime I knew the second I set eyes on him. I looked at him, he turned his head and looked at me and we both went ‘ah, there you are.’ I did try him but I’d already made my mind up by the time I got to his side.
 
KINDMARE said:
When you go to view a new horse (especially with a dealer) and you only have a relatively short time - how the hell can you tell if it’s the right horse for you?
Do you go on gut instinct? What a mine field it is buying a horse that’s going to be a massive part of your life in just an hour or so?
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You can't. It takes a year or two to find out if it's the right horse for you. Assuming it ticks the right boxes on paper, you just have to decide if you like it or not in the flesh. If you like it, you take the gamble, buy the horse, then find out if it's right for you.
 
I saw a photo of her on a dubious site on the friday, I wasn't looking to buy another, didn't want, or need, another as trying to reduce numbers, but kept thinking about her over the weekend - she arrived that week!
I knew she would be smaller than advertised, slightly older than advertised and not as bombproof as declared...so with these expectations, she was as expected. Definitely home for life.
I buy on gut feeling, but wouldn't recommend it and these are at the cheap end of the market.

(I don't learn though, 2 years later I had a similar feeling and bought Mildred the mule unseen etc. Again she has a home for life)
 
KINDMARE said:
When you go to view a new horse (especially with a dealer) and you only have a relatively short time - how the hell can you tell if it’s the right horse for you?
Do you go on gut instinct? What a mine field it is buying a horse that’s going to be a massive part of your life in just an hour or so?
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When you are wondering this, when you don't want to disappoint the seller, or when you want to make the seller happy by wanting their horse (by buying their horse) run. The horse is not the right one. Maybe even the seller isn't the right one (especially if it's a dealer).
 
Goldie's mum said:
I'm emotional when I view, so I do all the 'head' things over the phone or by email. Ask hard questions, have a list of must haves and 'definitely not if' things. I try to be rigid at that stage and say no to a lot.

At the viewing it's all heart & feel. My horse of a lifetime was the one where I forgot it was a viewing & just enjoyed a long hack & didn't want to go home without her.

(I've never bought from a dealer. I think you'd need a hard headed friend with you to buy from a professional salesperson. They'd be just doing a day's work while you're full of emotion. Puts you at a big disadvantage.)
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Yes, I totally agree with you Goldie's mum.

Regarding dealers, I've also never bought from a dealer. The bad ones muck it up for the good ones (I've heard there are good ones. I'm sure there are good ones). I've never really met a good one but I did once see a horse that was being sold by someone who I think did buy them to sell, occasionally, and I liked and trusted her. But she was an exception and her horse was not my sort of horse, so...

OP, if I were you I'd keep away from dealers. A bad dealer who is good at being bad is someone you don't want to deal with. He'll con you. He'll make you feel bad if you don't buy his horse. And his horse will be a disaster for you. It won't be as it seems. You'll wonder why it's doing what it's doing. He'll have an answer for everything, and even if you doubt him, you'll want to believe him.

It's easier just to stay away from dealers.
 
I went to see a mare which was exactly what I wanted but there was no gut attraction. Came home with a gelding, much smaller, kicked out at me, wouldn’t Trot up but I just wanted him. Can’t explain it.
 
My last two purchases were the complete opposite of what I was looking for but for some reason I just knew I wanted them, pretty much the second I saw their pictures 🤣
 
Weirdly I’ve never had gut instinct with any of them.
I’ve had to go away and think about it in some detail. It took me a week to decide if I should go ahead with Diva and then it was the owner who contacted me and said she would drop the price as she wanted me to have her. She turned out to be a pony of a lifetime.
Millie, I mulled it over in a service station having a late tea at Costa 😅
Oddly the one horse that I felt an instant draw to was Polly, who you could argue has been my least successful purchase 🤣

I have a list of criteria and a few definite ‘no no’ things. I basically just work off that.
 
Do remember that when buying from a dealer that many of their horses are very young.They are bought in,quickly backed and then sold on.They are VERY green.Unless you are genuinely experienced with young horses you need to factor in the help of a very experienced friend/instructor.
 
Lois Lame said:
Yes, I totally agree with you Goldie's mum.

Regarding dealers, I've also never bought from a dealer. The bad ones muck it up for the good ones (I've heard there are good ones. I'm sure there are good ones). I've never really met a good one but I did once see a horse that was being sold by someone who I think did buy them to sell, occasionally, and I liked and trusted her. But she was an exception and her horse was not my sort of horse, so...

OP, if I were you I'd keep away from dealers. A bad dealer who is good at being bad is someone you don't want to deal with. He'll con you. He'll make you feel bad if you don't buy his horse. And his horse will be a disaster for you. It won't be as it seems. You'll wonder why it's doing what it's doing. He'll have an answer for everything, and even if you doubt him, you'll want to believe him.

It's easier just to stay away from dealers.
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There are good dealers out there who will try and match the rider to a horse. Private sellers are just of capable of being less than truthful. At least with a dealer you can go on one of the numerous facebook dodgy dealer pages and see other peoples experiences or ask about the dealer you are interested in. The good ones won't mind, they want happy purchasers. Just don't feel any pressure to agree to buy on the spot and you choose the vetting vet.
 
Lois Lame said:
When you are wondering this, when you don't want to disappoint the seller, or when you want to make the seller happy by wanting their horse (by buying their horse) run. The horse is not the right one. Maybe even the seller isn't the right one (especially if it's a dealer).
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Yes, I would say gut instinct extends to the sellers.

If anything doesn't stack up or the sellers make your spidey senses tingle in anyway, then you're probably best walking away.
 
Flowerofthefen said:
I've known with all mine as soon as I've looked at them!! During my search for my last horse I viewed 12/13. I knew as soon as I saw him that as long as I could stay on him that he was coming home!! I think the general feeling of not wanting to get off when you ride during the trial is a good indicator.
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Tbh I didn't like mine and couldn't wait to get off of him (it was also -15 and didn't have an indoor to ride in) but I didn't blame him for being a jerk as he was a 2 coming 3 yr old and had barely had anyone on his back at all. I was going to pass on mine as a horse to just partboard at the time but he put his head on my hip when I was untacking. It melted his then-owners heart as well as another girl at the barn at the time. It was that exact moment that I changed my mind and my heart melted too. It hasn't always been the "perfect" partnership but it's been one that has never meant more to me.

Since he's been in the UK, he has started doing the "nose in face/kiss me/snuggle me" to almost everyone and has captured the hearts of many.
 
I think it’s about knowing what you want… and then do you get on … I only get on a horse that really fits the bill and is sound to my eye… once those tests are passed, I ask a few questions I know the horse probably doesn’t know the answers to … if it’s a baby I might ask for a shoulder fore and if it’s a bit older and knows shoulder in I might ask for a bit of travers … I am looking for a horse that tries - not one that says ‘no’ or panics… not understanding is fine but it is how the horse responds to not understanding that gives me the clue to whether we are a match or not… also if I don’t want to get off that is a great sign.
 
I am currently looking for my 2nd horse and I feel much more worried this time then I did the first time! I think it was more naive then… haha

Finding the right one is so hard, making sure you’re buying from someone honest, it really is a minefield!
 
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