How to enjoy a youngster??

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Karenpd

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Many years ago at Your Horse Live Pippa Funnell stated that her greatest fear in riding was failure.

I recently bought a new 5yr old and am finding him REALLY hard to enjoy - I've eventually worked out that this has nothing to do with him (he is as close to Mr Perfect for me as I could ask), but I'm SO worried about getting it wrong, messing him up, that I can't seem to just relax into it. Compounded by the fact that I seem to have extremely competitive 'friends' .....

Your thoughts?
 
No thoughts as such, but I feel the same. Perfect horse and i just don't want to mess it up. Have only owned mine for 3 weeks so hoping I will relax into it soon :-/
 
I have two six year olds - have had one of them since she was a just backed 3 year old and the other since last summer (backed later). Messing them up is my biggest fear too! Good support from the ground is the key for me - I quite often ring my friend and say "can I come over and ride round in your school so you can see what you think" when I'm having a bleurgh moment and doing my own head in even though the horse is perfectly happy.

My top tip would be try not to worry too much or make anything too much of a big deal as they feel your tension and it doesn't help. I also try not to listen to competitive "friends".

Have you got a good instructor to help and encourage you?
 
How to enjoy a youngster? - keep a bottle of wine close by (for medicinal purposes only you understand ;) ).

Honestly don't beat yourself up about it - as long as the horse is having it's basic needs met, is happy in itself and you have the support of a good trainer there isn't a lot you can do 'wrong'. Horses in themselves aren't judgemental as long as they are happy and well cared for. Issues only generally arise when it is the wrong owner/rider & horse combo. We all have bad days with our horses whether they are youngsters or older, more experienced horses where we get off thinking we should have/could have done better, but this is part of life with horses and as long as you continue to learn from any mistakes and move forward that's all you can do in terms of doing your best by your horse. Also remember every horse is different and that many roads lead to rome. WHat works well for one person/horse may not work so well for you/your horse.

Enjoy the journey...
 
Firstly don't compare yourself to others. Whilst its good to be aware of doing things correctly, being hypercritical & worrying can have a negative affect on both of you. Provided you are generally on the right track its worth noting everyone sometimes makes mistakes. All horses are different & sometimes you have to try x to realise y works better. The important bit is how quickly you realise y suits better than x, rather than persisting in getting it wrong, rather than the fact you tried x first if that makes any sense?
 
I think this forum is enough to make anyone feel inadequent or nervous, you only ever hear horrible things happening or being told you have to do this, or that otherwise you will ruin a horse...... End of the day there are plenty of ways to skin a cat, you could invent your own method and it be perfect,so my advice is, to walk away from here lol then you will enjoy your horse! :D X
 
I bought mine as an unbacked 3yr old and have done all the work myself (he is just turning 7) and fretted constantly that I wasn't good enough for him. And I did make heaps of mistakes I'm sure. But I look at him now and think, ok, so we haven't competed much, or started flying changes, and we still don't manage a perfect contact all the time, but I have a pony who walk, trots and canters and goes sideways or backwards when I ask him to, jumps what I ask him to and is a polite hack (when not having a panic, which is always going to be his quirk). For my part I do my best not to bump around or pull on his face and annoy him! As for enjoying things, I let him be a baby and have fun, we play football or do tricks as an alternative to drilling him in the school all day. We aren't perfect, but we have masses of fun!
 
Don't overthink. I do it constantly. I'm best at starting them and getting them going. Giving them confidence and making things happy and fun. I suck at correct schooling ect. So I sent my first homebred jumper away for training. I should have just lessoned and forced myself to step out of my comfort zone. Which I do now.

But I'm the same, hyper critical of myself. When there are days when things could head down a bad road, I pull up and head out to the fields for some fun. This way neither one of us loses the head, her blahhhhhh and me crying because I'm useless! So we have fun and tomorrow is another day. Does seem to help.

One day you'll be like, wow, can't believe this is my horse. I only realised how well schooled I had my ex chaser about the time he needed to retire. Still have him don't worry. I got him when his injuries were so bad the vet said he'd never come sound. He did come sound but I also had to be mindful of how I schooled ect. I thought I did a terrible job with him and yet it took a couple of years for me to say, wow, this horse is so much fun and so well schooled. How'd that happen! LOL!
 
KatPT said:
I bought mine as an unbacked 3yr old and have done all the work myself (he is just turning 7) and fretted constantly that I wasn't good enough for him. And I did make heaps of mistakes I'm sure. But I look at him now and think, ok, so we haven't competed much, or started flying changes, and we still don't manage a perfect contact all the time, but I have a pony who walk, trots and canters and goes sideways or backwards when I ask him to, jumps what I ask him to and is a polite hack (when not having a panic, which is always going to be his quirk). For my part I do my best not to bump around or pull on his face and annoy him! As for enjoying things, I let him be a baby and have fun, we play football or do tricks as an alternative to drilling him in the school all day. We aren't perfect, but we have masses of fun!
Click to expand...

This, exactly. Almost word for word, except that mine is rising 6 and less hot blooded than Kat's :D
 
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