How would one approach this

jenbleep

jenbleep

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I have been riding Charisma for her owner (J) for 18 months now (where has the time gone?!) and I went for a ride this morning and I got to thinking
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Her owner has started mentioning how there are times where she feels like giving up, where she justs want to be a glam granny (she's not even a granny, I think she means a lady who lunches!) etc etc. She says every weekend she is up to ears in [****] and she is finding it tiresome.....

I have no money, I see C about 4 times a week. I was thinking, how could I say to J that I would do C for her twice a day 5 days a week for a small wage?? Is that reeeeeally cheeky??
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I have a full time job, a 3/4 times a week gym goer, and a 2 x course student so I would have to organise my time
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but I wonder if J would go for it?

Do you think it is really cheeky to even ask???! You can be honest, it was just while I was thinking this morning mucking out.....

I'm not even talking about a 'wage' as such, but more like pocket money
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I'm hardly a 'Groom', but I'll be doing her a favour. And I know she (or you!) might say 'I should do it out of love' but at the end of the day C is not mine, and I have other priorities as well
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but a small wage might sway them


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I don't know, I might leave it...

Oh and she doesn't just have C, she has Harry as well (her daughters pony)
 
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not sure, I dont htink its cheeky for suggesting it......

however also understand she might see it as a bit cheeky if you have been doing it for a while and not asked......

you know her best so its your call!
 
I was in the same position.......too many horses and to the point I felt like giving it all in..........now found homes for two of them but I would have loved to have found someone like u!!!!
 
If you're riding C and getting the opportunity to compete etc, then I think that's probably enough?

Do you pay C's owner any money for riding?

I help a lovely couple out with their horses, the running total is now 8 lol!
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I go up most days sometimes twice a day and will muck out, bring in and feed etc, I normally do evenings and they do mornings. I don't get paid and would never dream of asking for money. In return for helping they let me keep their horses fit (there are 4 in work) and take me hunting
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So if there's a mutual agreement, and C's owner is letting you ride at the moment for nothing, I wouldn't be asking for money. I would take it on the days you did her you would be able to ride her, so that would be enough for me to do her twice a day 5 days a week. You get more riding, owner gets to keep her. I have priorities too, but you just need to shuffle things around... I don't see how a small wage (that you would need to declare and pay tax on) would really make a difference aside from financial incentive?
 
I hear what you're saying, but I promise when I have no money whatsoever £30 a week could be nice
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I could get a part time job but I'm too lazy and I won't have time to do anything else
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I don't know how you do it, I really don't
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8 horses crazy. I don't want to rock the boat, and J does do so much for me (taking us to the beach, etc! Oh and she said I can go hunting
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) I was thinking of an solution for my skintness and her knee deep in shitness
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Oh I pay for every other set of shoes
 
Is the horse on part livery or anything? if so perhaps you could say to the owner that you will take better care of the horse for the difference between DIY and part livery and do the work instead of the yard doing it

Does that make sense?
 
Are you worrying that she might be getting so fed up that she might sell her, and you could give her an alternative ? Why don't you sound her out first before you make your sugestion. Also weigh up what you are getting out of the deal at the moment and what you may loose if you get paid (being taken to the beach and hunting).
 
Suggesting it may be a good idea, but beware that you may lose everything you now hhave if she were to take offence to you asking.
I honestly dont see a problem with asking her a few bob in return for doing her a favour. I have been offered a fair few horses to ride/hunt/compete etc since i moved here. I currently have 1 to hunt/exercise/compete as i wish - no stable chores required. Will be boxed to hunt for me and plaited/cleaned etc. Get some cash for mileage - dont look for payment but has been offered - its mutually beneficial as owner hasnt time to do it all. Have also the choice of 8 other horses to exercise if I wish. Just turn up and ride as little or as often as I want. It works because the guy (who is a professional horseman) has had a lot of trouble finding someone brave enough/good enough to ride these horses. I enjoy riding youngsters and racehorses but due to my job cant tie myself down to a loan/hare and currently am not in the position to buy my own, though I may do in late spring. For now I am quite enjoying the lack of responsibility!!
 
I do think it is cheeky, you have free use of the horse (maybe a small contribution towards its real cost) and she does a lot for you.

By her saying she doesnt have time etc etc, is really a way of saying that she is tired by the sounds of it. Your money problems are not hers, and at the end of the day you are getting a cheap horse to have use of. You have to add up the use you really are to her, less what you are paying her and the full total cost of keeping a horse with everything included and your value to that, and the risk you are taking by offending her.

Have to agree with Freshman here sorry, not what you want to hear. If one of my sharers said that to me, I would quickly and swiftly tell them where to go.
 
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I didn't say it was did I
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And plus so what if I don't own her, I still care if she gets sick/injured! Probably care too much jeez

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I'm sure you do, but you don't have the financial commitment if the horse gets injured. The owner takes all the risk on that and as you have no money I assume you wouldn't be in a position to contribute to the vets bills if the horse was injured while you were riding.

I've been in your position in the past and have been happy to help the owner for free in return for the riding. So I also think its a bit cheeky to ask for payment when you have free use of the horse. If you were my sharer I wouldn't be impressed.
 
Reading between the lines of your original post, it sounds like she is fed up with having to do the horses every single day. How about suggesting you do both for her 2 or 3 times a week rather than just C 5 days a week. She might be more inclined to pay for that.
Good luck
 
Yeah I'm with Rosie fan - If you have to get off the sofa to do 1 you may as well do 2 ! It's the dragging yourself out of the house thats the hard part - if you offered to do the other pony for a fee and still did C for free she might be up for that !
 
Maybe she is hinting that she could do with your help.
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I think you have a pretty good deal there as it is and I would personally be offering my help for nothing as a way of repaying her for her generosity.

Can you not save money by not going to the gym so much and helping her instead
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That way you'll have extra money, she'll have help and you get a workout too - everyone's happy
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i think she might be a bit shocked, as she probably sees herself as doing you a bit of a favour by letting you ride her horse in the first place without paying to much. She could easily put the horse out on full loan and not have to worry about her/money afterall... so tread carefully!
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My pony is out on informal loan but if the loanee suggested anything like this to me , when they already have a pony for next to nothing, I would also tell them I no longer require them to loan the pony and find someone who would pay his livery, rugs etc.
 
Wow thank you for all your replies everyone!
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You can see why I was a bit
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about approaching it, because I posted it on here! I knew it would be a bot awkward!

Oh AND I never said it was her fault I was skint did I?! It's mine, nobody else's and I don't think anyone owes me anything just so you know.

I love Charisma so it's not like I'm going to go off and find someone who will pay me, I just thought we'd be helping each other out
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I can see the point that she might be offended of me asking, especially if I have benn helping her for 18 months.
 
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Maybe she is hinting that she could do with your help.
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I think you have a pretty good deal there as it is and I would personally be offering my help for nothing as a way of repaying her for her generosity.

Can you not save money by not going to the gym so much and helping her instead
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That way you'll have extra money, she'll have help and you get a workout too - everyone's happy
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^^ That is a very good one point Mr Meldrew, and one I will most likely be using
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I don't think you should be expecting her to pay you either!!

I would be quite offended if I was letting somebody ride my horse for pretty much nothing, and then they expected me to pay them before they would help if I was struggling!!

It would be much easier for the owner to loan to somebody who would take everything on, if she doesn't really want all the work anymore. It sounds like you are really lucky to have somebody willing to put themselves out so that you can continue to enjoy her horse (and I'm sure she enjoys her horse being useful too!) and I thing it would be much more appropriate if maybe you made a similar effort to help her in return! Sorry x
 
Ditto dobbin27. I'd be well P'd off if I were allowing someone to ride my horse for nothing AND take them places only for them to turn round and ask to be paid!

Most people in your situation pay the owner to use the horse!

I've been in a similar position as you with riding other peoples horses with no money exchanging hands and I would never have consisdered asking to be paid! In fact I usually contributed as much as possible towards the horse in things such as new rugs, wormers, feed etc.
 
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Sorry but not a huge price to pay for the use of a horse that you have not to buy, take risk of illness/injury but have the pleasure of riding whenever. Some people would jump at the opportunity. It's not the owners fault that you are skint!

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Sorry, but to a degree I agree with this. I think you're very lucky having a horse to ride where she pays for everything including competing. If the horse was mine, I'd probably expect you to do all the mucking out anyway for the return of free riding and competing!
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I agree that it would be tricky and possibly offend C's owner, by suggesting after 18 months of helping in return for riding that she may like to start paying you.

I cant say if it is right or wrong of you to want payment as i have no knowledge of what your agreement is.

My suggestion is that you drop into the conversation that your finances are a bit tight, and mention that you may have to start looking for a part time job soon. If the owner is thinking of employing someone to do her horses, then she may suggest you working for her.
 
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