I am right to be highly peed off?

Little Squirrel

Little Squirrel

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13 June 2011
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I have had a girl working for me for the past 14 months. She is a super worker, always on time and her riding has improved a great deal. She had no knowledge of riding racehorses when she came but she learnt quickly and although she can't ride anything keen and doesn't school she is still a valuable person to have around the yard. In the summer I let all my horses off and just have a few breakers in. I told her before she started with me that I am not busy in the summer so she wouldn't be needed. Anyway summer came and I told her to get a summer job as I could manage the couple that I had in on my own but would need her back in August when the horses came back into work. Summer came and went, I payed her a full weekly wage for the couple of hours work each day, she had days off that she wanted and it was pretty easy going. I also said that I would "sell" her a horse that she wanted when he finished racing which she would pay each week out of her wages. I took her and this horse to shows, without charging her a penny fo diesel, bring in her horse each evening and brush him over, feed him and do everything to him on a Sunday which is her day off.
She has now payed off the horse in full and my yard is now full up with horses for the winter. She then handed me her notice on Monday and is leaving at the end of the month.
I am so annoyed, I have been very good to her and as she is going to another racing yard I feel like I have been stabbed in the back to be honest. All because her friend works in this other place. I wouldn't mind but I have a runner in a month's time and to find somebody capable of riding a horse, let alone a racehorse in this area is near impossible.
She is taking her horse to a DIY yard which is fine but I just don't think she understands that she can no longer go out on a Sat night and stay in bed all day on a Sunday. Maybe she will appreciate what I did for her a bit more when she gets in the real world.

Sorry if this sounds like sour grapes, I'm just having a total rant!
 
I can understand your frustration at having gone the extra mile for her and her then leaving. Continue to be professional - that way the door is open if you ever wanted her back.
 
What a shame

I had something similar happen to me and to this day I dont think the girl or her mother realised there are not many people who would let someone ride for nothing without helping with chores etc(that was my situation..i was so nice to them).

I was happy to have a day off but when I went on holiday and would ask them to check the horse of just do a bit of poo picking they were always busy. We got dumped after a couple of years and I often feel a bit of a mug!


I dont think some people can see further than the end of their noses......as you say reality may hit home that someone else may not be so accomodating. Not everywhere is friendly as I often read on this forum how bitchy some of the yards are etc I am glad I dont have to put up with that.

She is a silly girl! I wish I had someone decent to share with but I do find it easier to do my own thing too now. She has been lucky to have guidance from you and whilst everything goes well with horses thats fine but when it does go wrong she may regret going! Her loss.
 
You might feel sad that she is leaving but I don't think you should feel annoyed at her. She has given you a month's notice, is working that and is simply changing jobs. Perhaps she wants a different work set up, to better herself, to further her experience, continuity of work all year round, etc.. I think good young staff do normally move on, its quite par for the course, but I can't see what she has done wrong here, she is not indentured or apprenticed to you. Perhaps you have blurred the boundaries between the work and personal relationship a little?
 
Mithras said:
You might feel sad that she is leaving but I don't think you should feel annoyed at her. She has given you a month's notice, is working that and is simply changing jobs. Perhaps she wants a different work set up, to better herself, to further her experience, continuity of work all year round, etc.. I think good young staff do normally move on, its quite par for the course, but I can't see what she has done wrong here, she is not indentured or apprenticed to you. Perhaps you have blurred the boundaries between the work and personal relationship a little?
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No I don't think that I have blurred the work boundries at all, at the end of the day she was my employee and not my friend per say. I am annoyed as she knew how I need her at this time of the year more than ever. If she left in the summer then fair enough, at least I would have had a chance to find somebody who can ride before the horses are fit and in full work when not every tom, dick or harry can handle them. As I said in my previous post she is going to work in another racing yard and so she will be left off in the summer (I did keep her on all summer and paid her full wages for quarter of the work that she usually does so I have been very fair). I appreciate that we all want to move on at some point but I am just annoyed at her timing and after all I've helped her with she leaves me in the lurch. Of course I wish her all the best in the future and aren't falling out with her, her timing just couldn't have been worse!
 
Don't take it personally, young people( and even older people) are naturally self centred and she probably thinks she's paid off the horse and its time to move on.
From her point of view if its not just about earning money, working with a friend and widening your experience that you can put on your CV could have made her mind up. To be honest if she was such a good worker I would asked her if an increase in pay would make her stay after all its going to cost you time to find someone else and then train them.
 
If she regrets what she has done it is her own fault you shouldnt feel hurt by this because it happens all the time stay positive youll find another person she probally just wanted a change of backround that is her own descion.
;):):D
 
She's an employee shes had what she sees as a better offer if you get p'd off every time this happens the only person who suffers is you. I employ a lot of people and try to treat them well but this I see as part of their 'salary' for that months work... If they go they go if they stay they stay and the good ones are far more likely to go than the bad ad they find it easier to find a 'better' job it's not selfish on their part if you were young and offered extras eg more money / accommodation etc what would you do? Young ppl change jobs often when a new opportunity comes up and I think that is all this girl has done. There ate a million girls out there looking for this kinda work so find another one - and maybe this time don't be quite so generous!
 
Mmm I can sort of understand your frustration - however, fuding the lines between employer and 'friend' always ends in tears......... Don't let it ruin your relationship.

It sounds as if she's had a brilliant introduction to the world of racing from you - for which she'll be ever grateful.

It's just a parting of the ways, no need to fall out about it.
 
Ultimately you pay her wages for the work she does. She paid you for the horse she bought so as I see it the slate is clean. Just because she has decided to leave doesn't mean she doesn't appreciate the opportunities you gave her, the timing might not be good for you, but she may not have been in control of when the opportunity arose to work elsewhere. If you want her to stay, talk to her, tell her how you value her work & find out why she wants to leave there may be room for negotiation.
 
I don't really understand why you are so angry. She was a good employee for you. And in return you were a good employer. In the summer you didn't have any work for her, so I suspect she wants to find something that pays properly all year. Surely you didn't expect her to stay with you for the rest of her life ?

I am sure that if you had decided to stop keeping racehorses you would not have given a minutes thought to what would happen to this girl.
 
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