I bet you can't top my weird thing I saw on my hack....

GrumpyMare

GrumpyMare

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So I was out hacking today, and it was going great, had a canter down the track, pony was behaving himself well. Then I got off to move the saddle back a bit and then hand walked him up the road to the laybye where I could get back on. So we got up there all fine and dandy, I checked my front end...no cars. I checked my back end. NAKED MAN MASTURBATING IN THE ROAD. Well I triple taked. and I was NOT seeing things. There he was, blatantly very naked, not even a pair of socks, cracking one out...in the middle of the road. Well bummer me I got on that pony so fast and we trotted up the road like noone's business. I wanna know where he came from... when he'd "Finished" he went back down the track we'd cantered up. *After the track we then went down the road and turned back around a triangle* so he could have been following me....which is very scary considering the lane I cantered up was very remote... *shudder*

Anyway I thought I'd share, anyone seen anything weirder?
 
We have suddenly come across a helicopter landing in front of us, whilst out hacking round our fields...and bearing in mind we had a fresh youngster with us...a bit hairy!
But that I grant you is MUCH weirder! Some oddballs in our country! :rolleyes:
 
OMG what a wierdo, the most wierd thing i've come across was a drunken couple butt naked having s*x at a busstop, it was a quiet road and it was a bit late, so not much traffic, but they didn't even look up when i passed.
 
Also illegal. I hope you got a good description of his..erm... to report him to the Police:D
 
nothing as wierd as that, only a homeless man having a poo in some allotments.

You should notify the police, the next female might be alot younger and more vunerable than you.
 
Also seen a naked man! weirdly we rode out and didnt see him, came back and he was in the bushes and jumped up! not my favorite experience! years and years ago now!
 
:eek: :eek: :eek: My word....! I do hope you reported this to the police.

I once came across a farmer squatting behind his tractor :o
 
Ooo lots of people having a number 2 then, not seen that then, I will get hold of the police, though I don't think they'll be able to do anything seeing as how it was a while ago and he probs just put his clothes back on *if he had any!??* and went back to where he lived. Scary thing is that's the road I walk down to work<_<
 
Something very similar as the OP but this guy was in his van wearing nothing but stockings, suspenders and high heels :D in January!
 
My friend & I came across a fat balding middle aged man dressed in a full ballet outfit - leotard, shoes, tutu = the lot!! We do have a lot of strange goings on involving only men on the moors near us but this was the best one we've seen so far :D
 
We just to have a bearded man in drag walk up and down our lane off an evening in huge high heels. He eventually got picked up by the police
 
Yep - happened to me a long time ago. Heard something behind us and turned round and there he was - not a stitch on 'playing' with himself - long hair and beard - was gobsmaked. Was a spate of 'flashing' and men in leotards and the like following girls on horses when I was a teenager. You could report it to the police but they'll just keep it on record - they wont do anything. I still wonder where he had left his clothes.......
 
YUK - at least my weird sighting is harmless.

Hacking past pub and saw a dead pig on the back seat of a yellow rolls royce convertable.
With it's head on the headrest. Most bizarre - it was a hot day too.
 
Thats horrid.

I was hacking my pony down a lane and rode past a car where two people were sat on the back seat trying to hide the fact they were naked! They'd obviosuly been at it minutes earlier!!

Then a few days later on the same lane I came across their car again. This time I decided to trot past - really didn't to see two overweight middle aged naked people again .... so trotted past just as the woman was bobbing up and down on top of the guy which spooked my pony, he shot sideways and I fell off onto the road. I was fine but they were obviously worried, so the woman got out stark naked, covering her boobs with one hand and her lady bits with the other and came running over to see if I was ok. That sight freaked my poor pony out even more.

I had to scrabble off the floor and said 'for gods sake you're scaring my pony and me - i'm fine!! ' She scuttled away and I never did see them down there again!!

It was funny afterwards but very surreal at the time!
 
Me and a friend came across a man naked with only a cowboy hat on and a rifle with a woman just in suspenders and stockings and a photographer :O we were also down a track and they definately weren't expecting to see us! I have never seen a man run so fast for cover trying to hide all! we were wetting ourselves laughing, apparently something to do with a calender! :)
 
We've also had a flasher. In a very stereotypical mac. Not nice!

Reported to the police, he was later arrested after flashing some kids on their paper round & turned out to be a local teacher :mad:
 
maxapple said:
Thats horrid.

I was hacking my pony down a lane and rode past a car where two people were sat on the back seat trying to hide the fact they were naked! They'd obviosuly been at it minutes earlier!!

Then a few days later on the same lane I came across their car again. This time I decided to trot past - really didn't to see two overweight middle aged naked people again .... so trotted past just as the woman was bobbing up and down on top of the guy which spooked my pony, he shot sideways and I fell off onto the road. I was fine but they were obviously worried, so the woman got out stark naked, covering her boobs with one hand and her lady bits with the other and came running over to see if I was ok. That sight freaked my poor pony out even more.

I had to scrabble off the floor and said 'for gods sake you're scaring my pony and me - i'm fine!! ' She scuttled away and I never did see them down there again!!

It was funny afterwards but very surreal at the time!
Click to expand...

Oh dear- sorry Maxapple, but i am crying with laughter here!! :D

Why do things like that always happen when we are trying to make a quick escape?! :D
 
wow! Some good 'uns here.
Saw an 'older' man sunbathing naked once, he apparently wasn't expecting someone that tall (ie on a horse) to wonder past and absent mindedly glance over his garden wall!!
 
maxapple said:
thats horrid.

I was hacking my pony down a lane and rode past a car where two people were sat on the back seat trying to hide the fact they were naked! They'd obviosuly been at it minutes earlier!!

Then a few days later on the same lane i came across their car again. This time i decided to trot past - really didn't to see two overweight middle aged naked people again .... So trotted past just as the woman was bobbing up and down on top of the guy which spooked my pony, he shot sideways and i fell off onto the road. I was fine but they were obviously worried, so the woman got out stark naked, covering her boobs with one hand and her lady bits with the other and came running over to see if i was ok. That sight freaked my poor pony out even more.

I had to scrabble off the floor and said 'for gods sake you're scaring my pony and me - i'm fine!! ' she scuttled away and i never did see them down there again!!

It was funny afterwards but very surreal at the time!
Click to expand...

lmao!! :D :D
 
maxapple said:
Thats horrid.

I was hacking my pony down a lane and rode past a car where two people were sat on the back seat trying to hide the fact they were naked! They'd obviosuly been at it minutes earlier!!

Then a few days later on the same lane I came across their car again. This time I decided to trot past - really didn't to see two overweight middle aged naked people again .... so trotted past just as the woman was bobbing up and down on top of the guy which spooked my pony, he shot sideways and I fell off onto the road. I was fine but they were obviously worried, so the woman got out stark naked, covering her boobs with one hand and her lady bits with the other and came running over to see if I was ok. That sight freaked my poor pony out even more.

I had to scrabble off the floor and said 'for gods sake you're scaring my pony and me - i'm fine!! ' She scuttled away and I never did see them down there again!!

It was funny afterwards but very surreal at the time!
Click to expand...

omg that was you!!!!!:o lol
 
hahahaaa! that is hilarous, although mighty shocking, some people have no shame. by any chance do you have any assulyms around where he could have escaped out of?
 
I had a similar experience as the OP when I was 15. My friend and I were out riding when a man over a hedge jumped up and flashed at us. I think he was expecting us to be scared, but we shouted "lets have a closer look!" or something, and "its so small!" etc, turned our horses, jumped the hedge and gallopped towards him. You've never seen anyone pull their pants up and run away so fast in your life!
 
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