I can handle when the body is failing...or the mind...

PucciNPoni

PucciNPoni

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...but not both together?

My poor old border terrier (14 1/2) has had a catalogue of issues for the past year. He has cholagiohepatitis - being controlled by drugs. He has good days and bad days, but we monitor with quarterly bloods. He's arthritic but recently has had some soft tissue soreness mostly due to my younger bitch mounting him. So I've separated them. Noticed that he has rather suddenly developed some dementia symptoms too. To me this feels like the final straw, he is on so many drugs for his other conditions and while I know there are good drugs to help with dementia I almost feel like it's taking it too far, now. If it was just the arthritis and liver issue I can cope - and have been for the past year. If it was just that he was developing the dementia but still fairly strong in himself that's another thing - can cope with that too.

I have been told by someone I greatly respect and admire that i'm being defeatist because I feel the end is near and not willing to try new drug therapy. Am I? I don't feel like the time is now, but I feel it coming soon. :(
 
Very tough call. Quality of life is all. I can find the scoring chart if that helps? It certainly helped me when looking at my 13 yr old.
 
is that the hhhhmmmm one? My husband found that for me. I scored it much lower he did - he had a 53/80 and I put down 38/80 . I think I'm a bit more of a realist, and generally the one doing most of the care.

Either score is above the 35 which is the line for where *they* feel it's an acceptable limit.

you're right though, QOL is everything.
 
I suspect that the time may be here to let him be at peace. This isn't meant to sound blunt, but there isn't an easy way; ask yourself if you're keeping him going for his well being, or your own. You aren't being defeatist, if you let him go, you're being humane and responsible, in my view, and if he hangs on for a few more weeks, time which I doubt will bring him much pleasure, do you suppose that you'll ask yourself afterwards if you were right to carry on?

It isn't easy, I really do understand and at such times, clear thought is often hard to come by.

Alec.
 
PucciNPoni said:
is that the hhhhmmmm one? My husband found that for me. I scored it much lower he did - he had a 53/80 and I put down 38/80 . I think I'm a bit more of a realist, and generally the one doing most of the care.

Either score is above the 35 which is the line for where *they* feel it's an acceptable limit.

you're right though, QOL is everything.
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Ultimately, it's what is acceptable for you. If you feel he's suffering, thand n it's time. If you feel he's enjoying life, maybe it's not quite time.
 
he is a good age so if he was mine I would be thinking the same as you.....I go by quality of life and if you have had a dog for a long time you will know if his quality of life is ok....only you will know when to call it a day, good luck with whatever you decide, its never easy!!!!
 
I feel for you so much PucciNPoni - my eldest girl is very nearly 13 and I am dreading having to make that decision about her - but as an owner I know you 'know' when the time is right. (((hugs)) for you xxx
 
Only three words matter - Quality of Life.

Having had two with dementia, it's not anything I would ever contemplate 'treating' again because they get so upset, you can see in their eyes, it's the most horrid thing and you are helpless. Any treatment is just prolonging the agony for them and is very short term according to my vet before they regress again. Coupled with his other problems I'm afraid I'd have no hesitation in calling it a day.
I'm sorry, it's a dreadful time but we always say about horses better a day early yet many rarely think the same for our house pets, I suppose because they are more like family.
 
Thanks guys, I knew you would say what I needed to hear. I do not believe in saving a life at all costs when it's at the end like this. I want to keep him around forever, but I can't bear to see him like this for much longer either. My husband isn't quite there yet in his mind, though.

This morning he seems fairly bright and cheery, and he is slightly less lame than he was the other day.

What makes this difficult too is that he is a miserable patient - always has been. Never an easy one to treat, despite the fact that he has always been very well handled from a young age - but do able. I warned the vet that I see that when it's his time to go he will need a massive sedative first as they'll never get near a vein, at least not these days. I can hardly get near him with a nail clipper without him having a screaming fit. That was the first clue that he was maybe going a bit senile....
 
A friend treated her dog for dementia. He used to get lost in the garden and would then panic, it was awful. The drugs helped but they suddeny stopped working one Sunday morning, who knows why, and he completely freaked and was screaming in terror, he didn't know who they were and ran away (contained in the garden) and hurt himself, it was the worst thing she has ever seen. Dementia is a cruel disease and personally I think it would be time for me. So sad for you though.
 
My husband is always the same; I'm always the first to spot something, I suppose because I am with them all day, I just notice it quicker and he always poo-poos it as in my mind (I'm definitely not a hypochondriac!) and tries to deny it for as long as possible until something's right under his nose. Having left it too long on some, I'm trying very hard to never make that mistake again in fairness to the ones we now have; he's coming around to my way of thinking but for both of us, it's one of the hardest things we have to do; there's always the what ifs, that's natural, but afterwards, a huge relief for them and as Clodagh said, dementia is such a cruel thing or them - and yourself to see.

Lol, we have one that can never have her claws cut, even filed as even from a puppy, she bleeds like stuck pig and wails like a banshee if you ever attempt it; luckily we have enough gravel, concrete, tarmac around that she wears them down herself. When it's toe clip time she smirks at the others (who couldn't give a fig) from behind the sofa, just in case we forget she's a special case!

Hugs for you all.
 
You are an "old salt" and as another old salt I will not offer any advice..you know it's coming time to act.i just want to send you a virtual nod and wish you well with the decision.
 
I have recently had an oldie, 16plus, PTS. For quite sometime I had been watching her quality of life. Sometimes it's hard to decide especially when they have become quiet and they spend a lot of time sleeping.
My girl was not on drugs but was a little senile and mostly only pottered in the garden in the last couple of months. The deciding factor came one day when she fell over a couple of times, she didn't cry, just picked herself up. Later I saw her leaning against the door post and I just thought 'you don't need to deal with old age any more'.
The hard part is deciding the right time, once the decision is made there is relief along with the sadness. Our thoughts are with you.
 
THanks for your comments.

I'm saying goodbye to my boy today. To say that I'm heart broken would be a gross understatement.

From younger happier days

chetcloseup.jpg


chesgallop.jpg
merlin2.jpg
 
PucciNPoni said:
THanks for your comments.

……..

From younger happier days ……..

merlin2.jpg
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Remember the happy times. A suitable caption to a poodle who thinks that he can take on a proper terrier and Macenroe-uesq …….. "You cannot be serious"! (actually, neither really looks convinced!).

In time you'll put the horrible sorrow behind you and remember the fun that you shared, though at the moment, there's nothing that helps, and along with everyone else, I really do understand.

Alec. xx
 
A brave decision, and personally, I believe absolutely the right one. Just because we can doesnt always mean we should, with regards to prolonging their life. Its all about the quality and the dignity and you have considered both. Hugs x
 
Alec Swan said:
Remember the happy times. A suitable caption to a poodle who thinks that he can take on a proper terrier and Macenroe-uesq …….. "You cannot be serious"! (actually, neither really looks convinced!).

In time you'll put the horrible sorrow behind you and remember the fun that you shared, though at the moment, there's nothing that helps, and along with everyone else, I really do understand.

Alec. xx
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hahaha that made me laugh.

Actually that was the day I introduced the poodle in to my wee pack (at the time it was just an ageing Minpin bitch who was the boss and Chester who was about 7. Merlin (the poodle) was only about 10 months here and though he was the bottom of the pack at his former home with the breeder, he quickly worked out that the wee terrier didn't have much bite in him having been bullied by two min pin bitches since day one! LOL

It's more my wee poodle bitch that will feel his loss. While she and Merlin are pals, she and Chester were besties. I think she noticed his mind (and body) changes long before I did as her behaviour started to change a few weeks back. She is now starting to dominate Merlin too as the whole dynamic has changed. Interesting the behaviours....



Thank you for all your kind words. It's a little too quiet in my house without the constant sound of his snores.
 
So sorry he's gone,he looked a little champion.
I lost my ST.apricot girl last year,I never thought I would ever replace her...she was the one.
My little schnauzer has triumphed ,she's such a character that I totally can say she's filled a huge hole. I know you expressed an interest in this breed,I'd say go for it when you are ready...the blacks 'especially from old bloodlines( Russian Belgian) are incredible dogs, and I believe would suit you well .My poodle boy loves his new girl,and she's definitely such huge character,she makes me laugh every day.
 
Bellasophia said:
So sorry he's gone,he looked a little champion.
I lost my ST.apricot girl last year,I never thought I would ever replace her...she was the one.
My little schnauzer has triumphed ,she's such a character that I totally can say she's filled a huge hole. I know you expressed an interest in this breed,I'd say go for it when you are ready...the blacks 'especially from old bloodlines( Russian Belgian) are incredible dogs, and I believe would suit you well .My poodle boy loves his new girl,and she's definitely such huge character,she makes me laugh every day.
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I adore schnauzers, but my next one will be an Alice baby - it's already been on the cards for some time now. But it's just a matter of finding the right mate for her.

I have considered getting a schnauzer to show, such bright sparks they are. I love looking at them, watching them move - and almost everything about them, apart from when you listen to one bark! LOL oh my ears bleed...but most of the ones I groom are pretty darned good.
 
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