I didnt expect horse ownership to be this hard

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You have the wrong horse. You have been given a horse that no one else wanted, that ended up in an auction as it has so many issues and you 'friend' has totally dumped him on you.

Give it back. Why pay out all this money, have all this stress? You given him a chance, it hasn't worked out, let your friend try again

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Ditto this, I was trying to reply earlier but couldn't word it
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i would move like others have said. somewhere knowledgable where you can get you the help need.
as for your horse getting hot feet and episodes of lami when in the stable, he may possibly have a rotation of his pedal bone from is lami in the summer and the rotation cant be reversed so i would imagine that standing still in a stable wouldnt make it very comfortable hence the heat, the only thing to make it more comfortable is a very thick bed to cusion his feet. but if hes grubby he might not appreciate it very much.
x mb x
 
Hey. I wish I was closer to offer to help
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I agree with Mrs Mozart in that this sounds like it could be stress laminitis. Agree with everyone else that you should look at moving but to be honest from what i gather it can be just as bad at many yards.

Are you able to buy a stable mirror? My mare has shocking seperation anxiety when another of her pals is out of view and my friend put up a mirror - it worked an absolute treat.

If he's stressed he'll be burning off major calories. I don't know what hard feed you use but I'd try and cut most of that out altogether and just feed adlib hay - if poss as low quality as you can get. I don't mean old and dusty hay just stuff that hasn't come off quality ground.

There is some suggestion that feeding yea sacc 1026 is showing good results in keeping the hind gut stable and reducing the risk of laminitis. Dengie do this in their multivit and its worth a go. My pony had antibiotic induced lami and it seemed to help him a treat.

Aside from that all i can suggest is just trying to hold it together for another few months until spring starts to kick in - then hopefully you can go back to having fun again.

In the meantime good luck and don't think your on your own. There will be people out there who can help when your feeling up to go find them.
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Certainly does sound as though moving yards would be the way to go. Having been on a very bitchy yard myself where I would creep in when I knew it would be quieter to see my horse I know how dispiriting it can be.

On a different note, your horse does not have to like you (this is a human emotion) but he does have to respect you. Groundwork could definitely help with this if done with the assistance of a confident/experienced helper.

My vets have reported a very high incidence of laminitis ths year.
 
Not read the other replies yet so no doubt I am repeating lots of other advice.

I can totally empathise with where you're coming from though - I've had a bargy difficult pony and I've been on some god awful livery yards and it really does make you absolutely miserable. Not to mention the fact that pony is no doubt picking up on your stress and misery and acting up because of it.

Firstly - move yards. Not all livery yards are like this and you just don't need it, it is supposed to be fun.

Secondly, get a good instructor - one who will help you out on the ground as well as with riding. The pony I used to have was seriously bargy and it got to the point where I couldn't ride him because he was just taking the piss and he wouldn't even let me tack him up. All you need is someone experienced who can help you and him through his problems, and I am sure you'll be absolutely fine.
 
I don't think I can offer much advice that other haven't already especially if you can't really afford to get lessons.
But if it helps I am going through a similar feeling. I bought a horse supposedly suitable for a novice rider back in summer and ever since its been a battle with bucking, field trashing, and fence smashing, I have already spent sooo much money on this horse and tbh I am not getting any enjoyment out of it at the moment. Not very helpful, but it may help to feel like you aren't the only one. Im so sorry for how you're feeling.

Hopefully the summer will turn things around x x
 
I agree with all the very good advice given here re: moving yards and getting help if yo are keeping the horse.

I also agree with the wrong horse theory. You've been lumbered with a horse with some problems there.

Just as a matter of interest, is he shod?
 
I would definitely get the horse checked for EMS and Cushings. This might sound daft, but are you positive nobody else on the yard could be feeding your horse without your knowledge. He really has no reason to be getting Laminitis as you are keeping him.

Stranger things have happened.

Good Luck with him, make sure you make full use of the forum too! Sometimes it even helps just to have a moan
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hi im lucky our yard is nice, but my horse is so manic i arrive , bring in , tack up and go within about 10 mins, so no time for chatting or bitching, apparnatly they had a real problem with someone before i was there but the owner got rid before i arrived must of known i was coming haha , i would not stay if it was miserable find another yard x
 
Umm, I shall try to be brief:

1/ move yards. Life's too short. You don't need this.
2/ if you decide to keep the horse: get some help ASAP and don't struggle on anymore on your own, plus get vet checks, physio, saddle checks teeth etc. Obvious (and expensive) I know, but necessary.
3/ don't make hasty decisions. You sound like you're quite new to horse-owning? Any relationship needs working on (and sometimes some outside help too, to help you see things in perspective).
4/ alternative to all the above; sell horse and spend the money on a holiday
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My friend's a vet and she said often cushings tests do come back negative when they are in early stages, and I also agree it could be equine metabolic syndrome, especially as you say he is fat. There is a good website detailing all the signs of these diseases, I think it is the Laminitis Trust's own website. There has to be a strong reason for the laminitis this time of year.

You are in a vicious circle, in that you don't want to spend time at the yard, but you need to spend some time with him to even begin to sort out his problems. I agree with the advice that he is not the horse for you, despite your good moments in the summer!

I think you are in a catch-22 situation, as with no school and no friends at your yard, I don't see how you can make any progress. Can you find some grazing only livery to save money and just leave him out 24/7 for a few months to give yourself a break? Then decide if you get a better job to move yards to somewhere with a school so you can plan a programme to build up some trust with him, using a good instructor? Give yourself a time limit, then if there is no improvement by say the summer you need to contact your 'friend' (I use the word advisedly!) and say you are not coping, and what would she like you to do with him??!! She has to realise that he is tricky and if she gifted him to you, she at least needs to know it's not working for you before you decide to sell.
 
I would move yards first. If you are stressed and anxious and unhappy, your horse will be stressed and anxious and unhappy. This may be TMI, but i don't ride just before my period is due, or on the first day of my period for this exact reason - i am hormonal and stressy, and my (already stressy) mare picks up on it and acts like a cowbag. Neither of us enjoy the ride, so we just have a couple of days off and are both much happier.

Is this your first horse? He really doesnt sound like much fun. i am very novicey, but my loan mare looks after me very well, despite being a stresshead. if she was as high-maintenance as yours, i am sorry to say that I would have given her back.
 
Hi Greywelshie,

I really do feel for you.
It does sound as though your current yard isn't the nicest of places to be so if you can - move!

If things do not get any better with your horse then I have learnt over the years that parting company is nothing to feel ashamed of - I've spent too many year forking out for horses that were not the right match and have now finally come to the conclusion that they are too expensive to own if you get no pleasure out of them and it always ends up causing arguments with your OH if you never have a good time.
Just because you sell on doesn't mean to say that your horse will always be like that with another owner. A horse I really didn't gel with is now the perfect four legged friend for his new owner!

Chin up and put a logical thinking cap on for a while (the emotional one sounds like it needs a little break
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Okay, number one, you do need to move yards. You say the others are about £100 a month compared to your current £60 a month? is there anyway you can make savings in the rest of your monthly budget to allow for this? especially as it would make you a whole lot happier.I understand sometimes it isnt that simple, especially if you have to have the horse close to home. Or, would it be possible to perhaps rent a field / patch of land from a local farmer, put down woodchip, and keep the horse out 24/7 that way? Maybe get him a shettie companion?

If that was me, with all the issues you've described I'd be having a serious re think too. As a first horse, it's far from ideal. You need to chat to your friend about it and ask her if she'd have him back maybe or help you. Because if his issues don't mprove and medicine/ management doesnt help his lami then what kind of life is he having? he;s stressing being kept in, but can't be kept out, he's nervy, jumpy, and can't be exercised because he's anxious. That's no fun for either you or the horse.
 
Although it might sound a little harsh, I agree with Flame. The poor horse is bound to be difficult if he has regular laminitis, an agonising condition. My mental arab would not be able to cope with the sort of lifestyle imposed by laminitis without going completely nuts. Lets face it, they're not always the easiest breed to start with! It sounds like this horse was very broken long before you got it and that if you persevere with it (especially with limited finances) you and him will continue to be unhappy.
 
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This might sound daft, but are you positive nobody else on the yard could be feeding your horse without your knowledge. He really has no reason to be getting Laminitis as you are keeping him.

Stranger things have happened.



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I wondered about this as I read your posts. I had a horse who could only eat hay/alfalfa and I had endless trouble persuading other people not to give her anything she couldn't eat (there was never any reason for any-one to give her anything). I do wonder if some of the bitchy people on your yard could even be giving your horse oats or something 'for a laugh'.
Not all vets are experts in treating laminitis. You really need to contact the Laminitis Trust for advice asap. The suggestion about magnesium was a good one, this also acts as a calmer. Please do not fit him with a cribbing collar, this would raise his stress levels even more and cause even more problems.
If I were you I would try to move yards. I too have had a horse whose behaviour changed immensely for the better following a yard move. In your situation I would look for a family run yard where there are several horses but only a few livery customers and where the owners are very experienced and will NOT put up with bad behaviour on the part of either horses or liveries. If you tell us where you are there may be some-one on here who can help.
I too think that you should make sure that your 'friend' is aware of the problems and knows that you might need to give the horse back before too long.
 
I agree with the others - life is too short to be miserable - for BOTH of you. You are not making him happy an he is not making you happy. Unless you can find a compromise then I think you need to part ways.

I would def look for another livery yard or rented grazing. You are broke so no reason why he can't live out 24/7. You just need to manage the grazing and watch out for frost etc with his lami & also get the approrpiate rugs for his alergies. I have kept anglo arabs and full TB's (clipped and in work) out 24/7 in Scotland with no problems. If he is part of a small stable herd with restricted grazing he may start to lose weight and relax more in himself and be easier to manage. It would be less work for you too hopefully.

If you deceide he isn't for you there is no shame in it. In reality you can't really afford him at the moment. You can't afford lessons or to move to a yard where you would both be a lot happier. I would give it a month or tweo and if no improvement then start thinking about what would be the best options for him, as sadly I think rehoming him will be very difficult
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sell the horse. get a new one that you can have fun with. and if necessary, move yards - simple!

dont struggle on with a horse that you dont want to ride it becomes a chore and no fun. owning a horse is fantastic just sounds like you've got the wrong horse and maybe the wrong yard
 
Thankyou all again for your replies. This may be a long post as i am trying to answer everyones questions
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The reason I said he was costing a fortune to feed, yet is obese is that he is a very difficult horse to keep in good condition. He is obese around the stomach area, he looks like a pregnant mare however he lacks any sort of topline, muscle etc and I get alot of conflicting advice on what to feed him. A nutritionist said feed Happy hoof and some baileys low cal which is what he gets, but he never ever looks in good condition. I have spent a fortune on suppliments, oils etc trying to get a nice shiney coat and a healthy look about him with no luck.

He has been in for the past few days as the yard is an ice sheet and has spent the whole time nipping,kicking the door, weaving, box walking and generally being a pain in the backside. I would love to keep him out 24/7 but unfortunatley this isnt really practical with his mud fever and he needs careful weight management and i find it harder to control what he eats when he is out at night. He also gets bullied in the field and being in at night gives him a little break (i had hundreds of pounds of vets bills in summer due to a kick) Also the yard I am at does not offer 24/7 turnout in winter only summer.

At times i wish i could sell him, or loan him out or something. But i do really like this horse when he behaves, like i said when its good its fantastic but for the most part owning a horse is not what i thought it would be. In summer i did manage to hack, groom him etc but it seems that in winter he has turned into a demon and all i can think thats changed is the season! Is it normal for a horses behavour to change so much over winter? If i did sell him i doubt he would last long in a new home and i couldnt do that to him. I promised myself this home would be his last as he has been passed about for years with no stablility and i believed when i was given him that with some routine and care he would change, seems i was wrong! He is beautiful to look at and rides lovely when he wants to. Im hoping in summer he will go back to his nice calm self but what if he doesnt, and im worried i will have this nightmare for 6 months of the year every year until he goes!

The yard was lovely at first but is very cliquey. The problem is that it is split into 3 barns of stables. The people in each barn are bitchy towards eachother, and then theres bitching within the barns themselves. The people i share a barn with are all very close and wont even barely speak to me. They say nasty things about horse and i know he isnt perfect but i cant physically stop him weaving etc. They also complain he eats more than their horses and forced me to spend £30 on a bale of hay for myself as they wouldnt allow me to share the barn hay as i will use more than them (they all chip in together) I have thought about moving but like i said i cant seem to find another yard i like that will accomodate horse. I have viewed a few but 2 wouldnt take him as he has vices, akll were alot more expensive and seemed just as bitchy, as some were totally unsuitable and there are not many yard options around here. The yard i am on at the moment was supposed to be great and i waited a long time to get on it. Some people are nice but they are not in my barn so i never get to really speak to them. I would prefer not to uproot horse again if possible, so i try to just egnore them. I would move if i found another yard that would take him and was nicer though, and was within my price range. (before anyone mentions, i was working full time when i got him, i lost my job after i got him. I am now looking into going back to university hence the part time job)
They also are pretty sticky fingered and i find my feed and hay etc get used alot quicker than they should (anyone know where you can get lockable feed bins lol!)

The vet has seen him alot of times and just says he is a typical lami prone arab. He has been tested for cushings and has been also x rayed which showed no rotation. I have also had him looked at by a million different people all of which reel of the usual lami advice you hear. I dont think anyone else is feeding him but you never know

He is unshod and im located in the north east (i would rather not say exactly where incase other liveries are on this forum and put 2 and 2 together!!)

Like i said, thankyou everyone for your advice it is much appreciated.
 
Just to add, its not that I cant afford him or couldnt afford lesons per se, its more the fact that I am already spending in the region of £200 a month on him for nothing back. I would not mind spending more on lessons/part livery etc. but at the end of the day this is no fun and I am begruding upping this monthly cost further if it is not going to be of any benefit, im already wasting enough money im afraid. I have spend near anough a thousand pound trying to get this horse right and as far as i can see it hasnt worked. He changed in summer and was a star, the seond winter came he reverted back to his old badly behaved self.

I loaned and shared horses before him. I have also worked on a yard so am not completley clueless, but I have never had so many different problems at once! I moved to a yard for help and support as i have so much to learn and have got nothing but greif. I wouldnt be able to have him out 24/7 due to myself needing to manage the lami. I also wouldnt want to rent a field as it would mean i would have to buy 2 ponies to keep him company (he wont go out alone, and if one pony needed to come in he would go mental being left)

Hope this makes some sense!
 
The reason I said he was costing a fortune to feed, yet is obese is that he is a very difficult horse to keep in good condition. He is obese around the stomach area, he looks like a pregnant mare however he lacks any sort of topline, muscle etc

Sorry to say this again greywelshie, but that just smacks of Cushings syndrome.

I had a Cushings pony. She had impossible to manage Laminitis. After two years of trying everything we could she had to be PTS. That pony cost me almost £20K in vets bills, drugs, shoes etc. The Insurance paid £5K of that.

Now this is worse case scenario I know, but you could find yourself in the same situation, all for a horse that could possibly go back to it's owner?

I don't mean to sound harsh, but seriously think about cutting your losses. Owning a horse should be fun. It's one thing getting a horse, then looking after it into it's old age, but I can't help feeling this horse has been dumped on you.

I hope I'm wrong, but I just get a bad feeling about this whole thing.
 
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I hope I'm wrong, but I just get a bad feeling about this whole thing.

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ITA. OP, what area are you in? Maybe someone local could pop in, have a look and help you figure out a bit of a plan if the people on your yard aren't helping you.
 
Thankyou persephone.

As i said he has been tested for cushings and it came back negative. But i will certainly ask the vet to check again. The vet has checked everything and he passed a 5 stage last year but still i am battling with his problems and getting nowhere.

Horse is lovely when he wants to be, but he has had so many bad experiences and problems that i dont know if i can undo them. He is legally owned by me as I have paid £1 for him as his previous owner did not want him back as she no longer has the facilities for another horse. He is registered in my name and my 'friend' does not want him back. I suppose its all my stupid fault as I fell in love with him at the time and wanted to help him, underneath the problems he is a nice kind horse and I did have fun with him over summer as i said, but coming into winter all of these problems have come into light. Individually the problems, such as the MF, lami, weight problems etc would be manageable but by myself with no advice or support i am struggling.

I suppose he has been dumped on me, he has been dumped about all his life and has never had a permenant home. I would like to try everything i can to help him. I will definatley wait until the summer and see if he magically changes back into the nice loving horse he was last summer but i dont know if this is realistic. In a way i feel like he changed so drastically coming into winter he might change back just as easily! If not i could always look into loaning him out as a companion or a rescue (or worst come to worst pts) but I couldnt just pass on his problems to someone else that wouldnt be fair.
 
This post is going to be blunt, but is something I feel strongly about.

He is difficult to manage, a pain when stabled and obviously doesn't like it. Yet is bullied in the field (a sure sign of a poorly horse).

I can only go from what you post but your horse sounds down right miserbale most of the time. This in turn is making you down right miserable. If you cannot manage to keep him in a manner which makes him comfortable and happy ( and it sounds like this could be difficult) either find someone who can and be very careful to vet the new home very well or make the responsible decision for both of you and have the poor thing put to sleep.

I repeat agian I am only going by what you post on this forum and all I see is a steady stream of reason why neither of you can lead happier lives.

I feel you have been dumped on by the person who gave you the horse in the first place who clearly could not do the responsible thing and for that I do feel for you.
 
Equidermis Plus from Feedmark is great for flybites, skin allergies & mud fever. I guess buying another supplement could be a problem if money is tight but when you get fed up every little issue seems to get blown out of proportion, so if you can eradicate any of the problems it is one thing less to worry about. It's never easy in winter even when you have an easy horse, so to have a difficult one makes it seem like it's never worth it. Believe me, i have one really easy one and one that has every problem going so I know what it feels like. I think as everyone says it may help you to move yards, get some vets advice re the laminitis and try to think that spring is just round the corner! Remember why you took him on and how much you wanted to help him - those reasons haven't gone away, you may just have lost sight of them during this difficult time.
 
As everyone else has said - move yards for a start. You say your horse is an obese laminitic - so you're saying he is actually obese?! If so, this is why he is getting recurrent lami! He needs to go on a diet and get a lot of exercise
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When you say you weren't told about his behaviour problems, Id be careful as the horse may well have not had these issues with the previous owners. New horses always test new owners...

You have to remember that winter isn't a particularily nice time of year for ANY of us with horses. I can't ride mine (so he has his time off) because I only have a paddock to ride in so the weather has a great deal to do with it. Winter months are spent spending money on feed for them, mucking out (although they live out 24/7 which helps a lot!) etc. and not getting anything back as such. Once spring comes, its all worth it though
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If you're that unhappy about it, I really would sell the horse. Ive never regretted having horses, even when Ive had a really really bad day.
 
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