I don't know how much more i can take!

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LauraWheeler

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Sorry for this pointless probably whining post. But i feel so down at the mo nothing seems to be going right. It started in Oct when my puppy ate some slug pellets out on a walk and he ended up in intensive care and stayed at the vets for three days. (We think someone had dumped the slug pellets on the downs where we walk). Then not long after this well it started in the same week my lovely old mare Lucy got some lumps on her lymph glands then blood coming out of both her eyes. She had loads of tests to try to figer out what was wrong but my vets couldn't work it out so when she went off her food i demanded she was refured to Liphook equine hospital. She stayed in for 4 days and had loads more tests. When we went to pick her up she had a nose bleed and several days later she started weeing blood. I eventually got a diagnosis She has a rear illness called Amyloidosis. She was put on steroids as they are the only treatment but the vets gave her a less than 50% chance and the steroids where a real worry as Lucy is a laminitic and has had rotation in all four feet in the past. But i desided i had to give her a chance. Lucy seems to be responding to treatment although no one knows what is ment to be happening as the illness is so rare.
I have to have a pony for my job (i am a nanny/groom) so i went out with my very limited budget to buy another pony. ( basicly my boss has lent me the money). I bought Herbie For £550 inclu everything. He has turned out to be a compleat nightmare and needs lots of work. (what did i expect for that little money!). I thought i had made progress with him yesterday it was one step forwards but today it was two steps back. But i could not buy a nice well behaved pony as i have a huge vet bill for charlie and lucy. And now just to make thimgs worse Charlie is intermitantly lame and my sister (who is a vetenary nurse) thinks he may need surgory to sort it out. To top it all off my boss has asked me to work valentinse weekend as she wants to go away and she needs someone to do the horses, other animals and look after the kids. My OH was so cross when i told him. I told her i couldn't do it and she made me feel guilty.
Sorry for the long post wine and chocs if you get to the end but if i try to talk to anyone i know about how i feel they just say they have it worse than me and i should count my self lucky. Especialy if i mention money but i only earn £80 a week and i have to pay liphook £200 a month and my normal vet £120.
Oh when did life get this hard. Sorry if i make no sence i haven't slept propaly since Oct. Don't know why i'm posting this to be honest.
 
Could you not get a 0% credit card so you could pay both bills off and then pay off a more manageable amount each month . Does your job include anything else like a room or livery for your pony because £80 a week is really low tbh
 
It's OK we're all allowed to whine! You've had a lot of stressful, worrying and scary things happening to your dog and your beloved horse whilst trying to hold down a hard job and find time for your relationship and it probably feels like it's all stacked against you. It never rains but it pours.. While I don't have much advice to offer I do just hope it all starts to get easier for you very soon Laura.
 
£80 a week is well below minimum wage and because of that is illegal, i hope you get free livery for the ponies at your bosses at the very least, if not i'd cut my losses and try to find something where i'd earn more to pay my bills off asap
 
I might be a bit thick but I don't understand why you have to have a pony for your job. In my world of work a nanny looks after other people's children and a groom looks after other people's horses. Am I missing something?
 
personally I think your boss is taking advantage of you.£80 a week plus she expects you to buy your own and keep your own horses out of that
shocked.gif

I presume she provides free livery for both your horses,but she surely must realise that expecting you to keep 2 horses regardless of whether she pays for their livery or not is asking alot of you.As for expecting you to work valentines weekend just so she can go away assuming you don't normally work weekends is taking the mick a bit.After all you should be entitled to some family time of your own.
Tbh I think the best solution would be for you to sell Herbie on.You have said yourself that you are forking out almost all your money each month on vet bills.I don't see that it is fair that your employer expects you to have a horse of your own to ride when she expects you to accompany her children out hacking.She should have brought a horse suitable for the job herself for you to use as at the end of the day the horse was brought for her benefit.
 
Sorry life is so hard for you at the moment it always seems when your having a hard time everything that you dont want to go wrong seems to do so. I would agree that a 0% credit card would be good for paying off your bills. I hope things start to pick up for you soon and your new pony starts showing more signs of progress for you.
 
I wouldn't get a credit card i have tryed in the past for just such a problem but i have no credit history. I am lucky with my job as i live in as family and the horse i use for work is mostly paid for. But i have to pay for Lucys keep now. (i would not be without her though no matter how much she costs) I have a £400 overdraft i am always very close to the limit but havn't gone over yet. My family try to help me with Lucys keep when they can but they don't have alot anyway.
 
You say you live in as a family, so you must know your employer quite well. Can you not talk to her about how you are feeling and the money situation. If she is nice she might be able to help you and at least you would have someone to talk it through with.

£80 per week does seem very low even for live in. You could call a nanny agency and check that the rate you are on is the going rate and then perhaps approach your employer politely and constructively and ask for a rise or perhaps a combination of a rise and a loan of some kind?

I agree you should sell Herbie on as he clearly isn't right for you. I don't really understand why you are obliged to provide your own horse presumably for accompanying the kids. If you happened to come with a suitable one, that is handy for the employer but it surely can't be a requirement. Could you consider a loan pony/horse perhaps to fill the role?

Chin up. Find someone to talk it through with (ideally your employer) she may not realise how badly you are struggling.
 
Why do you HAVE to have a pony for you work though?
So you get keep for two ponies & live in all found + £80 per week? How mny hours do you actually work?
The other thing you may have to come to terms with is as Lucy is old & very ill with a history of laminitis you have to think with your head (& pocket) rather than your heart, along with taking in to account how much you want her to have to go through by way of experimental treatments.
 
Thankyou everyone. I know it prob seems odd but i normaly love my job and it's not realy part of the problem (exept the lack of money and that is because all this has happened at once). Herbie was bought to use for work but he was also bought for me. I can't/don't want to sell him on as no one else would want him not at the mo anyway with all his issues. I know he will be a lovely pony he just needs time and an expereanced person. To be honest much as i love Lucy now she was so much worse when i got her than Herbie is now. I couldn't bare the thought of him passing from home to home the rest of his life or worse and at the mo when things go right with him and we take a step forward it is the only good thing in my life right now.
 
i feelmit for you as i am having a shitty time at the moment as well and i have an £8000 vet bill for my sick horse although insured it was been done to death. i am a student and realy stuggling but i do believe things will get better so keep your chin upa nd things will get better
 
How many hours a day do you work? Is it full time or is there time for another little job in the afternoon a couple of days a week perhaps? There are some jobs which would be able to fit around this, a friend used to clean some offices just for a couple of hours an evening and that was a massive help to her money wise. Might not be possible, but then again it might be worth a look if you really want to keep both ponies and stay where you are working. Hope things pick up for you soon and that Lucy continues to do well on her medication.
 
Hmm I use to pay my groom more than that and she was live in and had full board and lodge and I thought I did not pay enough at the time. We did do extras as well though, we bought her smokes weekly and helped her with regular flight costs so she could go home and visit her family. We also let her use our phone free (she had her own phone number and a phone in her room we arranged for her privacy) to call the UK and even her sister in Australia. She also had one of our PC's in her room and free B/band connection. Also we let her use our second car whenever she wanted.

I must add at that time I was on yard also and we have a quiet family yard. We did a little bit of dealing but she did not work Full time hours.

I think you are being grossly under paid honey, and if they truly value you they should give you a raise, even if it is just a small one. Why don't you sit down with your boss at the right moment and explain how much you enjoy your job but with your vets bill etc. you need to start to look for a job that pays a little better. If she values you she will respond by giving you a raise. If she doesn't you know they do not value you and you can move on by starting to look around for something else.

Big hugs for you honey, sounds like your having a rough time x
 
Sorry to hear you are struggling, I hope things look up for you soon.

I agree with the people above though who suggest looking for another job. In order to be comfortable and not stressed about finances you basically will either need to spend less or earn more, right? :-)
 
Laura really sorry to hear you are feeling down.

Can I suggest that you have a look at

www.moneysavingexpert.com

for help with your finances, there are good articles and an amazingly helpful forum full of people who have great expertise on financial issues.

Off the top of my head, you could approach a credit union for a low cost loan that doesn't require a good credit history. You can take steps to start getting yourself a credit history too by registering to vote and getting a credit card and spending a small amount on it and paying it off on time each month.

I would also suggest that you look into whether you are being paid legally, the citizen advice are probably the best people to advise you on this. £80 a week sounds very low but if your board is added on it might be legal (nothing to stop you asking for a raise though). If you need your horse for your job it may well be a legitimate business expense too so you might be able to save yourself some tax.

Finally you could contact the blue cross, they may be able to help with some of the ongoing vets bills.

Best of Luck.
 
Please, why do you have to have a horse for work?? That sounds very strange, anything you need for work has to be funded by your employer. It would be different if you were self-employed. I also think you are working below minimum wage and should check this out.
 
[ QUOTE ]
The other thing you may have to come to terms with is as Lucy is old & very ill with a history of laminitis you have to think with your head (& pocket) rather than your heart, along with taking in to account how much you want her to have to go through by way of experimental treatments.

[/ QUOTE ]
I can't give up on Lucy yet she is not suffering with her illness that was one of the first things i asked when she was diagnosed. The vet said she doesn't even know she is ill. I can still ride her a little and i'm not one to just put a horse down after 12 years of ownership just because she can't do all the things i want her to do anymore. That would also be the case if i couldn't ride her at all. If she starts to suffer it would be a different matter if she had shown any signs of laminitis i would call it a day but so far she is doing ok.
As for needing a horse for my job i have to take the children riding, take them on sp rides etc also take them hunting (which is all paid for). Herbie's livery, food and shoes are all paid for to. It's just Lucy i pay for although she is in a rent free field keeping a broodmare company so i don't pay field rent. Strange as it prob sounds i also needed to get another pony before Lucy is gone as i think if i waited till after i wouldn't be able to bring myself to get one as nothing will ever replace Lucy. I think i had almost convinced myself she was going to live forever (although i truly know she won't) so i am struggling to come to terms with the fact that oneday she won't be here anymore. I know i sound mad and i feel silly saying it but that is how i feel. I think that is whats getting me down more than the money situation (strange as that prob sounds). I will get through all that some how as my animals come first.
 
why dont you phone the citizens advice bureau as they might be able to assertain whether you are being paid enough (which i suspect you may not be!) its free for there advice!!
Good Luck
hope things get better!!
 
[ QUOTE ]
Please, why do you have to have a horse for work?? That sounds very strange, anything you need for work has to be funded by your employer. It would be different if you were self-employed. I also think you are working below minimum wage and should check this out.

[/ QUOTE ]

I think, from previous posts- but I could be wrong...that OP has to take her employers children out on hacks and hunting etc.
 
Totally agree with all who said to get some advice. I know you feel that you get a lot with things paid for etc but you still need money to live on. The entry fees for things you have to take the children to don't come into it. If they stipulate that you must have a pony then thats down to them to fund, livery, feed etc all included.

The only consideration with regards to how much you're paid should be that you live in, so they provide board and lodgings.

Have a chat to them, you can't solve this alone, and chin up, if you let them know how tough you're doing it chances are they'll be willing to help. And if they're not, you need to look for another job which will enable you to solve your debt problems and provide you with enough income for life in general. Very hard when you like your job, but sometimes we all have to make difficult desicions.

Keep smiling, we're always here for advice xxxx
 
Right, well if you need something to take your employers children out, then they should not only pay the keep, but provide the mount. You don't seem worried that you're being underpaid, but may of us think you are. I'd be looking for another job.
 
I think that I had better post a reply to this thread as I feel that the whole situation about the job has been misrepresented. The job is only 30 hours a week over 5 days and is totally flexible, in fact Laura has 2 other part time jobs that are fitted in during the afternoon. Wage is made up of full keep for one horse including shoes and full board for Laura. It was a bonus that Laura had a pony that could ride and lead when she came here but it is not a condition of the job and in fact since November she has been using one of our ponies for hunting and hacking duties. I did work out the hours at minimum wage and take off the costs and believe that it is above minimum wage. There are other perks such as use of lorry and trailer, free lifts to shows if we are going etc etc. We are very fond of Laura and she is a valued friend and employee, I have tried wherever possible to help with anything that I can including taking Lucy (pony) to Liphook and collecting and going to collect medicines. We are aware that Laura has had a difficult time and it has all come at once and feel that we have been as helpful as is possible. This is only posted to all of you who believe that I am using slave labour!! Cheers
 
The Minimun Wage is at present:
Those aged 22 £5.80 an hour (= £174 for 30 hours)
The rate for 18 to 21-year-olds £4.83 per hour (= £144.90 fpr 30 hours)
For 16 and 17-year-olds from £3.53 per hour 30 hours = (£105.90 fo 30 hours)

The keep of the horse(s), use of lorry etc needs to be kept completly seperate from your employees salary so as to make it quite clear that you are paying above the minimum wage.
 
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