I HATE MY YARD!!!!!!!! (long sorry)

RubysGold

RubysGold

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Woke up to a text from my YO this morning saying 'horses in please' I assumed he meant that from now on the horses would be coming in on a night, so me and another livery went and organised the stables and he told me they were coming in all day.
So got Roo in, found out her new stable leaks! All over my new bedding
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Asked the YO at 10am to bring some hay round, so at 5pm went to sort horses out.
Went to one of the liveries, and asked if the bail of haylage was ours or hers, she said hers. And then went MENTAL! She said if we wanted, we could roll it in to our tack room but we have to get into that F'ing shop and F'ing pay for it this time, not taking any more s**t like last year. So we asked what she meant and she said 'people nicking my haylage' My friend said, who, so she smacked my arm and went 'you for a start'
I am not a thief and have certainly not nicked any of her haylage!
So then went to YO and said, that without any haylage Roo can't stay in, as I'm not going to starve her, he said it was my own fault and that its too wet tonight for her to be out.
So I went back round to yard and have borrowed a bail of hay off a livery, I'm going to farm shop tomorrow to buy her it back.
Then the other horrible livery started telling me that my horse has muscle wastage and that I need to start working her, and she went on and on at me about how schooling is boring and I have to hack her out every day. She then said that my stable was leaking and she could have told me before, she doesnt know why I moved stables. *If she knew, why didnt she say, plus she shouldnt have been looking in my stable*
I don't see why I should be treated this way, I have done nothing wrong to any of the liveries.
I'm really upset about tonight
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Cannot stand my yard!
 
Sounds like these people are mental!! I really feel for you, riding and having a horse ahould be a pleasure and a hobbie but people like that make it a chore.
Chin up and good luck with it all!
 
I've looked at other yards before.
The only other ones are a bit of a trek away, and I would have to be on part because they have no diy spaces. And I simply refuse to pay someone to look after my horse, she's mine and I want to do everything.
They are so horrible, apparently, my friend was talking to sam, (the one who tried to tell me what to do) and mentioned me, Sam said something along the lines of 'ergh that girl.....'
I don't get it, I'm the quiet one, I'll chat to anyone, help anyone, have never pretended to know more then I do, so why be so awful!
I may not be doing everything right, but neither is anyone else, so why am I being treated like this, at the end of day, she is my horse and I'm trying my best!
 
There is no need for it at all
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,i see how you feel though i have been at many yards and now basically have my own place kinda thing with only one other person there but we still have a school adn that i would have a look around see if you can get any other yard, no one needs to take that from anyone, i would just go up there and get on with doing YOUR horse and leave them to it, i would not speak to them cuz they have by the sounds of it been talking behind your back for everyone to think it is you, definetly start lookingg round at other places if i were you, hope it gets better for you soon
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it will turn out for the good at some point
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Yo...useless... you could say that.
I asked him if I could swap stables and he said that was fine.
I told him the water pipe was leaking and asked him to sort it, he said he would, about 3 days later I mentioned it, he said he'd forgot. That day another livery asked if he'd sort electric out for her, next day, he's done her electric and not touched my water pipe.
10 times I asked him over 2 weeks, he finally came to look at pipe, told me it needed resealing and he would ring plumber, a week later he still hadnt. So I rang my uncle *a plumber* and he came and sorted it for me.
Its his job to make sure all the things are working!
So now the stable is leaking, on the roof is like some sheeting, which I think needs replacing, but he'll never get round to it, so no point even asking
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I've only moved into the stable next door to where I was, the other stable has a really annoying trough thing at back that didn't touch floor so I couldn't get my bed how I wanted it.
The livery with the haylage is under an arch away from all of us, but that is where the haylage gets delivered to and she has a tack room next to mine so theres no escaping her.
She's annoying, because she'll come over and chat or just say hi. Next time you see her, say hi, and she'll grunt at you or blank you. If she is in a good mood you're ok, if she's not she can't even be polite!
 
I think the only thing I can do at the moment is go to the yard and completely blank those people, I will just pretend they don't exist.
When Sam was lecturing me about my horse, I waited for a gap in convo and said to my friend, right are we gonna get on, I'm not standing around chatting, its too cold. And then I walked off.
When they left, she said 'Bye Neil'. And totally ignored me.
I was seething when I left that yard
 
I appreciate what you are saying about wanting to do your horse yourself but leaving aside the yard politics, you are obviously not getting a good service where you are now. If you could afford part and you were happy with the service and the facilities would it not make having your horse more enjoyable. I also agree with a previous post, if she smacked me, she would have bene looking for her teeth five seconds later.
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omg what sort of crap have you been puting up with come on girl sort yourself out 1st of all her who slapped you on the arm should of been told straight ever do that again n id of put her on her arse n if she said id been stealing well id of dragged her to the YO and it would of kicked off the YO would of been told i pay you rent for a stable not a swimming pool i want another dry stable and a refund on my bedding and nosey whos telling you to hack your horse ect ect would of got blasted beleive me im 36 years old n iv had horses 29 years and i supose at 1 time i was just like you but over the years iv changed i dont give un wanted advise or call eney one behind there back i dont creep up peoples arses on the yard like some do on our yard i dont take kindly to eneyone bitching about me n will have it out with them i dont borrow off people and if you dont like me i couldnt care less i keep my horse at the yard i choose for my horses sake not the people on there and beleive me they know that because some have tried it with me and havent said another word after iv had them my advise start as you mean to go on
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It's not surprising that some horses have problems when you meet their owners...

Only thing you can do is move if you are unhappy. it's an expensive way to be miserable.

It astounds me all the time how soem horsey preople think the normal rules of behaviour do not apply to them, and how rudeness and disrespectful lack of manners are common.

Manners and politeness are most important - that is what makes society work - without them we're just another herd
 
Well - I travel globally - and nowhere do I meet the rudeness and lack of manners in quite the same way as in the UK. It has almost become a defining national characteristic.

When you go into a shop or a restaurant in the UK after being in the US or Canada for example, the difference is outstanding. What customer engagement?
 
Rubysgold - this is an awful situation!
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First of all, I would write a letter to your YO, and keep a copy. Keep the letter short and to the point, and try not to use emotional language when writing it. Explain that the other livery is being extremely unhelpful, and has resorted to hitting you in the presence of a witness. Tell YO that you would like an explanation as to why she feels she has the right to treat you this way, and put the responsibility for sorting her out firmly with YO.

I would then list the matters that need to be sorted out. The leaking stable, and the hay situation. Ask if YO has a policy on purchasing hay. Explain that at least 48hours notification should be given if horses are to be brought in overnight, to enable feeding requirements to be sorted out.

I would ignore this person, and, by the sounds of it,the other nasty liveries. They are bullying you, perhaps because you are younger, take more care with your horse, etc.

I would then try to find an alternative yard. Perhaps you could ask if some one has a stable spare on a private yard, or another livery yard.

I really hope that you can sort something out, it is horrible to be stuck at a livery where you cannot enjoy your horse.

Good luck
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First tell the bossy girl to sod off, she's most probable jealous. The YO is paid for a service eg- dry stabling and decent grazing good fencing. If you are also paying for hay on top, ask him to put yours in seperate stack.
 


(((Hugs)))

Just sit tight until you can move, sounds like nighmare, even if you have to travel, surely thats better than spending time on a yard that you don't like, with nasty people and poor YO.

Get yourself organised with everything you require for your horse (feed wise) and get it in your tack room under lock and key/feed bins so you don't have to rely on anyone else (thus giving them less to moan about) and just try to make the best of the place until you can move.

Stick with people you can trust and only listen to them, don't be taking advice from people who don't genuinly care, there only out there to cause trouble and make themselves feel better about their own pathetic little lives by picking on the quiet girl.

People will see her for what she is if you keep yourself to yourself and remain polite with everyone, just ingnore her, she has no right to use you as her punch bag everytime she's in a bad mood.

I'd certainly think about moving though.
 
I agree with kenzo and f_s - I spend some time looking for a new yard - and if that meant part livery until a DIY space came up so be it.
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I know its cheap there but I think its a case of you get what you pay for and I think you and Ru would be better at a yard where they had the interests of the horses first ie a worming programme!!
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As for the livery that hit you - wait until you are leaving and then superglue her windscreen wipers to her windscreen!!
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Is the other stable you had before dry? If so I would move my horse back into it. The inconvenience of not getting the bed how you like is minor in comparison to your horse standing in wet bedding for hours at a time over night.

Ask the YO what the policy is with the hay/haylage ie do you order it or just let him know when you have had some and how much

Ignore the other liveries and get on with your horse and keep an eye out for another yard

Good luck - hope things improve for you
 
Poor you!! Sounds awful, have had some similar experiences myself. Agree with Elliesmum, move back into the dry stable, otherwise you will waste loads of money on bedding. Ask YO clearly & politely exactly what the policy on ordering your hay is, like is there a set day each week? Then buy an iPod, switch it on, ignore all the nasty bitches & get on & enjoy your horse, worked for me!! Good luck
 
[ QUOTE ]

I don't get it, I'm the quiet one, I'll chat to anyone, help anyone, have never pretended to know more then I do, so why be so awful!
I may not be doing everything right, but neither is anyone else, so why am I being treated like this, at the end of day, she is my horse and I'm trying my best!

[/ QUOTE ]

probably why. its the quiet ones who are easy targets for horrid bullies, i know i am a 'quite one' too.
if you could find a bit of extra bravery and turn around and say something like' just who on earth do you think you are talking to me like that?!' they would almost certainly back off and leave you alone!!!
hate yards. thats why i am on private yards and have done so for the last 5 years....least then its only potentially YO who is a nutter!lol
 
[ QUOTE ]


(((Hugs)))

Just sit tight until you can move, sounds like nighmare, even if you have to travel, surely thats better than spending time on a yard that you don't like, with nasty people and poor YO.

Get yourself organised with everything you require for your horse (feed wise) and get it in your tack room under lock and key/feed bins so you don't have to rely on anyone else (thus giving them less to moan about) and just try to make the best of the place until you can move.

Stick with people you can trust and only listen to them, don't be taking advice from people who don't genuinly care, there only out there to cause trouble and make themselves feel better about their own pathetic little lives by picking on the quiet girl.

People will see her for what she is if you keep yourself to yourself and remain polite with everyone, just ingnore her, she has no right to use you as her punch bag everytime she's in a bad mood.

I'd certainly think about moving though.

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Very good advice IMO. So sorry you are having such a horrible time. The yard sounds vile, I would definitely look for an alternative even if its part livery to begin with. Check the notice boards in tack shops and feed merchents, ask you farrier and vet if he knows any good yards (assuming not best mates with YO!). check local papers for any adverts, but basically get the hell out of there!

PS I LOVE the idea of super glueing that liveries wind screen wipers
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Good luck hun and keep your pecker up
 
I hate bitchy yards!
I was at one until about 3 months ago, and made me seriously question whether I actually wanted my boy or not, I dreaded going up there.
Moving was the best thing I have ever done. It is 5 mins further away from me, or 10 mins in rush hour, but it is the best thing I have ever done. I now love having my boy again.
It might be worth having a ring around local yards again, as in my area at least, a lot of vacancies have come up recently and YM's are really struggling to fill them.
 
OMG - and i thought the crap we're going through was bad.
For a start if ANYONE laid a finger on me I'd have them on an assault charge faster than they could say "whoops".
Secondly I have come to the conclusion that no matter how good the facilities, how convenient the location is to you etc nothing is worth being unhappy for.
Where we are is a dream on paper - close for us, great facilities etc but i have been ignoring for so long how unhappy the bullying from the YM is making me.
Hubby and i have had a long chat this weekend and we're moving. Hovis doesn't care how neat his stable is or how nicely the jumps are painted. He just wants grass, some mates and a happy mum.
Its taken me a long time to see this but i can tell you even making the decision to look elsewhere has made me feel a thousand times better.

Good luck with whatever you decide.
 
[ QUOTE ]

She's annoying, because she'll come over and chat or just say hi. Next time you see her, say hi, and she'll grunt at you or blank you. If she is in a good mood you're ok, if she's not she can't even be polite!

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Why is this all so familiar?

I was at a yard once with someone like this; it was like she had PMT every week not monthly. One minute she was your best friend, the next you were like something that she’d trod in. But it was the same for everyone, it was like she needed a new best friend every week so she could bitch about the person she was best friends with the week before, but the longer you were there the more you learnt how to handle her.

At one point it upset me and I spoke to YO about it and she said just smile, sing ‘good morning’ and that’s it done, say no more if she tries to engage in conversation, say ‘sorry, got to get on.’

Being polite will irritate her more and not engaging in conversation will make her even madder cos she can’t get into a fight with you.

I do feel sorry for you but there is no way I would move yards for some low life that thinks she can bully you. She’s the one with the problem, if you like the yard, it’s a price that’s right, and it’s where you want to be then stuff her.

The only problem with moving is there might be 2 of her type waiting at the next yard!!

Being polite and happy is the best way of sticking two fingers up at her (she'll hate it).

Fingers crossed everything works out for you.
 
Sounds like a nightmare and unfortunately i can't offer advice other than what others have said about moving.

But in the meantime (or assuming you might have to stay there) i'd have another word with the YO. I'm not saying for one minute you are doing this but if you act like a victim you'll be treated as one. If you know what i mean.

So speak to him with a bit of force i.e TELL him that this has to stop, that you are a customer and not doing him a favour, your offended by the comments which have been made and there are legal implications if they continue. Explain you are happy with other aspects of the yard and that you just want to be left alone to get on with your own thing.

As for the woman who started this. Have a similar word with her. Tell her you've taken 'advice' on the fact she 'assaulted' you. I know technically it wasn't but the lines on this are very blurred indeed. TELL her that you've also spoken to a welfare officer re her allegations of neglect and they are more than happy to come and assess your horse. Once the officer has confirmed you horse is not neglected / wasted then you'll be taking legal action to stop her slandering you. Animal neglect is a crime and if she's saying your committing a crime she's damn well better have proof.

I hate [****] like this which is why im going to put stables in my garden to use as emergencies. There is nothing worse than being on the receiving end of someones bad mood / ill temper / pms.
 
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