I just don't know what I'm doing :(

maisie1988

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Hi,

Try keep this short lol. So had one loan horse after another each with issues, old, tanking etc. took back etc. so I sold my old connie to buy a 5yr old tb of livery women. I had seen te horse for months and he is super sweet and well behaved. And the best horse I've ever had, never silly etc.

Problem... I'm in experienced, he's young and I don't know how to school really. I have a lot of lessons of my instructor but just not getting it. Because of cost of lessons I've been rising in school on my own a bit.

I'm trying to push him forward, and twiddling the reins so he is working from behind etc... But as I'm twiddling he is just turning his head left, right, left , right and sticking it out. ?????

I was upset the other day having a lesson as just couldn't do it then a girl at yard got on and did it straight away and he was forward as just looked right. I got back on and couldn't do it again, then was getting annoyed and was really firm on the reins and boom just like that he went soft and light and forward and just wet lovely. I was so pleased.

Last 3 days head is back in the air and looking about etc... I'm twiddling and he just looks annoyed and isn't listening.

What am I meant to be doing? I'm told I'm too soft but I feel like I have one hell of a grip on his mouth? That can't be right?? Surely? So how am I being too soft when I feel I'm being extra my heavy in the hand??

What should I be doing?? Sorry fed up, he is a fantastic horse and going to end up totally ruining him :(
 
I replied on your other post :)
And while I was replying dressedkez wrote pretty much the same thing :)
 
Twiddling sounds suspect tbh- you need to provide a consistent contact, and twiddling won't do that. Playing with the bit to encourage them to work into the contact is a bit different, but is quite hard to do well. If he's moving his head about, I'd say you need to really work on keeping your hands still rather than moving them...
 
Either the instructor isnt getting the message across in the right way or you are not twiddling in the correct way. It should be a pressure release system so once he softens you soften too if not be a bit firmer until you get a small response and then release. Problem with most people is they never learn the release bit so the horse ends up leaning or pulling or going above or behind the bit as it fights/ avoids the pressure
 
I had some good advice I think I will just ride him forward and stop trying to play with the reins as all I'm getting is a confused horse who doesn't have a clue what I'm trying to do as I'm just doing it wrong... I don't fully understand what I'm feeling for etc. right I'm going to ride him forward and not let him dribble along and stuff anything else for now... I couldn't sleep for worrying. Ill talk with livery lady tomo, she is very very good but I'm just not getting it lol :)
 
Oh no my instructor is fantastic and so patient with me! She makes it look so easy when she gets on lol... I'm no natural!!!
 
Okay lots to address here! :)

Firstly, it sounds as if you are riding 'backwards'. As in you are trying to ride with your hands, but really you should ride with your seat and legs. The twiddling worries me - if he is swinging his head from side to side that means you are applying an uneven pressure.

Forget about twiddling for the time-being. If you watch dressage riders you will see that their hands are still. Ideally you should have a fairly still (but supple, make sure bendy relaxed elbows and wrists!!) contact so that your horse has something to accept, and then ride him into it using your seat and legs. If you need to half halt do it gently and with your fingers only, it is important to never pull back.

I'm not an instructor, so I'm probably not vocalising very well something that depends totally on feel. What might help (has helped me a lot) is to watch a video of yourself riding him, and compare it with dressage riders on youtube, or even just the girl up the yard riding him, and see if there are any obvious differences that you can amend.
 
My old instructor sounds very similar to yours. She would get on my horse and ride her in a forced outline (I thought this was correct at the time but have since learnt otherwise) and was very focused on hands and getting her head down. During lessons I was tense and dizzy was tense and I could do what she was trying to tell me so I changed. Best decision ever! My new instructor teaches me to ride from my seat and the goal is to get dizzy stretching and forward. By the end of my first lesson with her we were doing just that :) my horse is also a young tb. I love my lessons and am so relaxed and so is dizzy!
 
Oh just to add enjoy your horse :) it shouldn't be stressful make sure you include plenty of hacking I only school mine once or twice a week for 15min tops on top of my lesson as I don't want her to get sour. Also it's worth remembering that young horses without muscle struggle to maintain an outline
 
My old instructor sounds very similar to yours. She would get on my horse and ride her in a forced outline (I thought this was correct at the time but have since learnt otherwise) and was very focused on hands and getting her head down. During lessons I was tense and dizzy was tense and I could do what she was trying to tell me so I changed. Best decision ever! My new instructor teaches me to ride from my seat and the goal is to get dizzy stretching and forward. By the end of my first lesson with her we were doing just that :) my horse is also a young tb. I love my lessons and am so relaxed and so is dizzy!

That's the other thing I wanted to say - head down doesn't necessarily mean the horse is going correctly!
 
Your instructor I am afraid is not very good. The idea is to help you get the best out of the horse not to get on and show how easy it is for her. You learn by being told what you are doing right so that you remember the feel and can try and do it for longer.
As every one has said fiddling with the mouth is the worst thing you can do, you send the horse forward into you hand, and if it a novice horse the contact is light but consistent. So you hands have to be steady in relation to the natural movement of the horses head, but your shoulders and arms are not fixed. It is unwise to force a horse into an outline and if he generally obedient and you are in control that the main thing.
I would invest in a really good riding text book, and try and get a lesson on a horse that already knows the ropes, you can learn skills on that one that you can use on your own horse.
 
Oh just to add enjoy your horse :) it shouldn't be stressful make sure you include plenty of hacking I only school mine once or twice a week for 15min tops on top of my lesson as I don't want her to get sour. Also it's worth remembering that young horses without muscle struggle to maintain an outline

How I agree with this. In that hacking I would also include steady hill work (if you've got some available) to build up muscle. Don't forget you can incorporate schooling exercises on a hack at random intervals. There is no rule that says you have to be going round and round in a school when you are trying to teach your horse something.
 
You may find it easier "out of school" too. I would also change instructor to someone who is highly recommended and give it a few lessons. Your current one may be lovely, she just may not be the best one for you.
 
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