I would just like to point out...

its those farrieromes that do it the smoke simply infiltrates every part of your brain and causes you to think your farrier is the most wonderful person alive so he can bend you to his will causing you to start home baking his favourite cakes (its cheesecake & apparently trouty wont let him have it!!!!) and biscuits and even buying him a special mug for his coffee ! do not think you are alone with the farrier addiction i have problems to! although my farrier is the bestest one!
 
Well you see... discouragement only makes me want him more! It's like putting a cake in front of someone who loves cake and saying "don't touch the cake".... you're gonna touch the cake!

Next time he bends over bite him bum then! Should get it out of your system! :)

I never did get to go on a date with Adam and prove that I really am not a coogar more of a tame, happy little puppy...

... have eaten up a few various chaps since though! Went through a "uniform phase"...
 
What the hell are Morags? This thread has distinctly adult, and dare I say it sinister, undercurrents...

Hahahaaa... I'm perfectly happy to give Troutina the opportunity to do the right thing and run off... OR for HIM to do the only really decent thing and tell her he's gay or wants to be a nun or something!

Morags are baps, boobies, bazungas... whatever you would like to call them my dear :D

I hope it isn't the smoke!! My last farrier was about 9ft tall, 103 years old, and although very nice, was rather mad! No temptation to bit HIS bum I tell thee!

Sod uniforms. Give me a sweaty, smelly man in a vest and chaps any day ;)
 
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ooh this post is like a mini Bridget Jones!! You should write a book!!

So what's his name and sexy flatmates name? I'll stalk them on FB for you!! I'll be your fag hag
 
I reckon hes the wealthiest farrier in oxford after all the money you pay him so its only justified that he should take you out on a date to repay the favour? no? ;)
 
AND ANOTHER THING!

He charges the boss £10 visit fee, £65 - £70 a set (we have a horse with feet the size of boats!) and £35 a trim... but when he has shod/trimmed mine I don't get charged the visit fee, and it cost me £60 a set and £20 - £30 a trim... now, either I'm enchanting and he wants me in his chaps, I look like I have no money and lick the goo off the underside of dustbin lids to survive, or the fact that I told him to eff off and die when he had the cheek to say he wanted £80 for a set sunk in...
HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

ETA: I would LOVE a fag hag... I almost had a rather dashing Hungarian one, but he dressed up as Debbie Harry and ran off with a man who wore the shiniest shoes I have ever seen in my life!
 
Oh my goodness, i had to re-read this thread, you are so out of your mind starzaan, have you tried internet dating, if he sees you with someone else, might he get really jealous and realise what he is missing, especially if the hot date is just after farrier visit and you are all dressed up with morags on display??????
 
ETA:
My beautiful, wonderful eighteen year old dog just died (my third birthday present...), and although I miss her terribly already and it's only been ten minutes, she went peacefully and was happy and pain free...and I think she would have loved for me to be the damsel in distress to snag him!

I know this is insensitive in the extreme, but................. you know his dog, he knew your dog - ring him in floods of tears, and he can't possibly resist. Your dog would be happy to have helped! xxx
 
I know this is insensitive in the extreme, but................. you know his dog, he knew your dog - ring him in floods of tears, and he can't possibly resist. Your dog would be happy to have helped! xxx


Sadly, this dog was rather too old and blind and bonkers to come out onto the yard and play when horses were present... so she didn't meet his lovely dog, BUT I am still very much planning on playing that card! I can cry at the drop of a hat...what a skill! I'm sure she would be very pleased to have helped!

I could always go down the "my other two are very sad because Biz died etc. and so please bring your dog to cheer them up!" route... HMMMM....

I am NOT out of my mind thank you! I am very much IN my mind, which might be the problem... and I very nearly did the "oh I was on my way home from (insert something which requires morag enhancing outfit and heels..) when you rang, so had to bring them in before changing ***look at my morags you fool!!!!***, I shall just go change! ***shameless arse wiggling down the yard***" but then thought that might be a bit strange.... :D

Niagaraduval... I'm on it, my EX fag hag did a shocking job! Merely perved all over his flat mate and then LEFT to feed his horses. SHOCKING.
 
Crikey! Aren't you a little concerned that he will see all these posts that you are making about him on a public forum (and calling his GF names) and work out who you are, and the fact that you are talking about him?! :eek:
 
OOOH! CHELLE! Have you found a pony then?!?!?

And Puppy, I think we have already established that I no longer have any self respect or dignity, and if he comes at me with a hammer for calling his girlfriend a trout, I'll nick Binky's farrier!

As I have said, I'm sure his girlfriend is wonderful and lovely, but I'm MUCH more so. AND I have just made the most amazing cake in the history of cake.

Nuff said!
 
WAHOOOO! YES!!! Quickly! Now now now!!! xxx

I'll fit him with some kind of satnav device and send him off to you ... *gets uber-geeky OH on the job* ... keep him til winter, he's got typical *****e TB feet and will probably lose one a week until the end of the summer xx
 
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